I Can Barely Say
by soraspromise
Summary: After defeating Xehanort and his thirteen darknesses, Sora decides to continue to help those on other worlds rather than returning home with Riku and Kairi. When he returns home three years later, he has to figure out how to repair the relationships with everyone he had to leave behind. Sokai. Post-KH3.
1. Prologue

I CAN BARELY SAY: PROLOGUE

_I said I told you everything,  
but I left something out  
underneath the stairwell.  
and I'm under lock and key;  
you can probably tell.  
Powdered keg in a prison cell._

"What's wrong, Sora?" Kairi looked at him curiously. Everyone else had already gone to bed, but he had pulled her to the side just as she was about to go up the stairs. However, he had yet to say anything. She could tell he wanted to, but it just wasn't coming out.

'_I know Yen Sid said not to say anything… that it would distract her and Riku. But…'_ Sora's eyes flickered around the stairwell, '_How can I just _not _say that I can't go home with them?'_

Kairi waved her hand in his face, calling, "Sora! Hello?"

"I'm just nervous." He let out. It wasn't technically lying, but he knew that she would jump to conclusions and assume that he was talking about the battle with Xehanort. Of course, he was nervous about that too, but that was just one of so many things.

A few days prior, Yen Sid and King Mickey had privately met with him about their concerns about the worlds once Xehanort was hypothetically taken out of the picture. Even once Xehanort was gone, it was likely that there were still people out on other worlds who had met him and may have been inspired or intrigued by his ideas. And of course, there would always be people negative ideas of their own.

They hadn't exactly specifically chosen Sora for the task, but they happened to ask him first. He knew Riku and Kairi both seemed more than ready to return to their regular lives. And Aqua and Ven had been through more than enough struggles to last an eternity, so Sora agreed to take the task upon his shoulders.

"I'm nervous too." She admitted quietly with a sheepish smile, "I mean, I'm sure everyone else is as well. But it's nice to hear someone else say it."

Sora smiled at her briefly before continuing, "It's definitely the biggest battle we've ever done, and there's so many more of them than us. I'm just scared someone's going to get hurt and I'm not going to be able to do anything about it."

Kairi answered in an even quieter voice, "…I didn't think about that."

He quickly reached out to touch her shoulder, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"No, it's okay. It's good to be aware of possibilities." She shook her head. His chest tightened as she locked her eyes on his and smiled again, thinking of how it was going to be such a long time before he saw her again. The pain must have shown through his face because she frowned and asked, "Are you sure that's all that's bothering you?"

"Well…" He considered telling her the truth, but he came up with an alternate plan, "There's something I want to do since there's a lot of things that could happen tomorrow."

Kairi raised her eyebrows, curious, "What's that?"

Sora took a few steps forward, not sure if this was going to make the future situation better or worse. She looked up at him curiously as he rested his hands on her shoulders, not fully understanding until he started to lean in towards her and closed his eyes. Once she realized what was going on, she closed her eyes as well and rested her hands on his chest. Though she started out extremely nervous, she melted the moment his lips met hers.

He kept it short and sweet even though that was the last thing he wanted to do, but he didn't want her to catch on that he was essentially trying to say goodbye. Pulling himself away, he suggested, "We should probably go get some sleep."

Kairi stared at him for a moment before his words made it to her brain. "Oh, right." She blushed, following him up the stairs.

As they both turned for the rooms they were staying in, Sora said softly, "Goodnight."

"Goodnight." She smiled before disappearing behind the door.


	2. Returning Home

**Authors note: I'm not exactly sure how long this is going to be but I'm anticipating around three chapters or so. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own KH or the song "I Can Barely Say" by the Fray which was my inspiration for this fanfic. **

I CAN BARELY SAY

_I've been gone so long,  
I can barely say.  
All I know is now I wanna stay.  
Has it been too long  
since I went away?  
Cuz I'm trying to find the words,  
but I can barely say…_

Chapter One: Return Home

It'd been three years since Sora had been home and he couldn't have felt more uncomfortable. His mother, of course, was overjoyed to see him again and so far had not really asked any questions about his extended absence. As for the rest of the people he cared about, he wasn't sure if they'd be so happy about his return. Not wanting to cause a scene by his arrival, he basically had to sneak back onto the island and into his own house in the middle of the night.

The morning had come all too soon and now Sora had the blanket raised over his head to block out the sunlight. Having little luck, he tossed and turned, wishing he could fall back asleep.

Hearing a knock on his bedroom door, he questioned loudly, "Mom, aren't you going to be late for work? I'm okay, I'll make breakfast for myself later."

Receiving only silence in reply, he lifted the blanket off his head and stared curiously at the door. Finally, he heard a deep voice answer, "It's me, your mom let me in on her way out."

Sora's mouth fell open. "Riku?" He watched in shock as the door opened and the older boy walked into his room. He had gotten even taller and his hair was back to around the length it was before they first left the islands.

"Hey." Riku greeted, walking over to Sora's desk and taking a seat.

"…How did you know I was here?" The brunette stared up at him, confused and at a lack for words.

He laughed, "Nice to see you again, too." Pointing to the lamp on the desk and to the ceiling, Riku said, "I saw your lights on last night. Your mom never comes in here when you're gone so… I figured it had to be you."

"Gotcha." Sora sat up in his bed, smiling sheepishly, "And I am happy to see you… I just didn't know if you would be happy to see _me_."

"What makes you say that?" Riku stared at him intently, a bit confused himself.

"Just… I know it hurt you and Kairi that I decided to not come home with you two." He paused and looked down, a deep frown taking over his face, "…Does Kairi know I'm back?"

He heard Riku shake his head, "No. I haven't told her yet."

Sora let out a sigh of relief, "Good. I don't know what I'm going to say her." He looked back up, "But I don't even really know what to say to you, either."

The older boy shrugged, "You did what you had to do, Sora." He gave him a reassuring smile, "We can't blame you for that. Though, I won't lie, Kairi was really upset for a while. But not really at you, just at the fact that you weren't here. Sometimes it was a little more directly at you… but she was just frustrated and sad."

"What about now?" He pressed.

Riku's eyes flickered around the room, unsure of how to respond, "Don't get me wrong, she's missed you and I'm sure she wants to see you. We've talked about you a lot. But… it's been a few years, Sora. She's been going to school at the university and she actually just moved into an apartment this past summer with Selphie." His mouth parting, he paused for a moment before finishing, "She's dated a few guys here and there too."

"Oh." Sora felt a pang of sadness in his chest, even though he knew that was more than likely going to be the case, "I mean… I expected that. I knew she couldn't wait for me forever."

"I know it still hurts, though." Riku lightly touched his friend's shoulder, "Sorry."

Sora shook his head, "It's okay. We just kissed once; it's not like we were in a real relationship or anything."

Glancing down at his watch, Riku realized he needed to leave, "I've got to get going to make it on time for my class, but listen. Don't let Kairi find out from me or anybody else other than you that you're here or that will make things really awkward with her. She doesn't go to the play island anymore but she hangs out by the dock where all the row boats are tied up around sunset. Let me know how it goes after you do talk to her."

The brunette gave a half-hearted smile, "Thanks. I'll keep that in mind."

Riku gave Sora a quick hug, "It is good to have you home, Sora. Don't over think everything and try to relax."

He hugged him back, laughing, "I'll try."

"See you later." Riku pulled away and waved at him before walking out of the bedroom and down the stairs.

Even though the situation with Kairi was still completely up in the air, Sora already felt immensely better knowing that he and Riku were on good terms. Finally feeling calm, he laid back onto his bed and let himself get a few hours of sleep.

After getting up, making lunch, and taking a shower, he was beginning to feel less and less out of place. Changing into fresh clothes, he was thankful he hadn't grown almost a whole foot like he had the first time he came back home so all of his clothes still fit for the most part. Now donning a white t-shirt and brown shorts, he sat back on his bed and contemplated whether he should try to see Kairi today or if he should give himself more time to think.

'_What am I gonna say? What am I gonna do?'_ He moved his hands up his face and through his hair in frustration. Every situation he pictured in his head ended up with her being upset with him or even just flat out refusing to talk with him and it crushed him. But at the same time, he was dying to see her. He missed her so badly every single day that he was gone, his heart felt like bursting the moment he landed on the islands knowing that he was so close to her again. If he wasn't so afraid of her reaction, he would have already found her by now.

'_I guess I still have a few more hours to figure out what I want to say before she's done with classes and heads to the dock._' He tried to reassure himself.

But several hours wasn't enough; he felt just as hopeless as he had been earlier that morning as he dragged his feet along the path towards the shore. He was thankful that his house was fairly close to the dock so that way he wouldn't run into anyone else on the way there. He was afraid if anyone else saw him that he might lose whatever little bit of bravery he had managed to build up and turn around and go home.

He stopped, closing his eyes and trying to relax. '_It's still Kairi. She's still your best friend, the girl you grew up with; there's no reason to be scared of her.'_ He repeated over and over inside of his mind.

Eventually he managed to continue to pull himself forward but the moment he caught sight of the dock and Kairi's unmistakable red hair, he froze again. She was looking out over the ocean, in her own little world and from what Sora could see, she seemed to have only gotten more beautiful since he left. She'd let her hair grow out a tiny bit more and although she was still fairly slim, she had gotten a little bit curvier as well.

He stared for a moment before starting to walk towards the dock in a daze, his throat tight and his mouth dry. He still had no idea what he was going to say and his heart was racing, making it harder to think.

He was halfway across the dock when he saw Kairi beginning to get up, seemingly not noticing him still. Just as she started to turn, he noted she had earphones on.

She nearly walked into him. "Oh," Kairi jumped back, surprised, "I'm sorry, I didn't—" She looked up, starting out with an apologetic smile that quickly fell into a look of shock. "S-Sora…" His name barely escaped her lips before her legs began to buckle underneath her. He gently caught her shoulders and guided her down before scooting backwards to give her breathing room. She glanced at him repeatedly but didn't ever hold eye contact, asking quietly, "You're really home?"

He nodded with a small smile, "Yeah."

"Wow, I just—" Kairi started but shook her head and quickly stood up, "I'm sorry, I-I have to go." She rushed past Sora, hiding her face.

Sora stood up as quickly as he could, reaching out to catch her shoulder and pleading desperately, "Kairi, wait. Please..."

She shrugged him off, repeating tearfully, "I'm sorry." With that, she hurried off down the path towards the town.

Sora stared at the place she just was a moment ago, trying to let everything soak in. "Damn it…" He cursed himself and hung his head.

He wasn't even sure how he got home, all of a sudden he was just there and he was grateful to have his bed to collapse on. He wanted to bury himself underneath the blankets again before he remembered Riku told him to call.

Hesitantly, he grabbed the phone off of the corner of his desk and dialed Riku's number.

"Hello?" His friend answered.

"She ran." Sora said quietly.

Riku paused, "What?"

"She ran." Sora repeated, his heart dropping even farther into his chest, "I used to always be wrong whenever I assumed stuff about Kairi so I wanted to believe you, but this time I was right. She didn't want to see me."

"Just slow down and explain what exactly happened." Riku spoke in a slow and calm tone.

Sora let out a frustrated sigh, "There's nothing to explain, Riku. I went down to the dock. She was staring out at the ocean and listening to music. She got up, almost bumped into me and started apologizing before she realized it was me. She almost passed out and then she ran."

"She probably just didn't know how to react. It's been so long since she's seen you… She's probably just as scared as you are." He tried to console him before asking, "I mean… how long did it take you to get the guts to go down there in the first place?"

"All afternoon." The younger boy answered truthfully.

"See? You had all afternoon to prepare yourself to talk to her. Maybe she just needs time too."

Sora fell backwards onto his bed, mentally and emotionally exhausted, "Maybe…"

Riku paused for a moment before suggesting, "Just wait a few days and then try to talk to her again. I'm sure she'll come around."

"Alright." He answered, still feeling a little unsure. Taking a brief pause, he added, "And Riku… thank you."

The older boy gave a small laugh, "No problem, Sora."

"See you sometime tomorrow?" Sora questioned.

"Sure. See you then." Riku answered before hanging up.

Putting the phone back on the charger, he heard a knock at his door, "Sora?"

"Yeah, Mom?" He called back and she let herself into the room.

She motioned towards the phone, "Getting reacquainted with everyone?"

Sora shook his head, "Just Riku. And well… I tried with Kairi."

"I'm sorry, sweetie." She bent down to hug him, "I'm sure everything will turn around soon."

He gave a small smile, "Thanks."

She let go and took a step back, suggesting, "I've got to start cooking dinner soon. Do you want me to bring it up here?"

Sora shook his head and waved her off, "No, no. It's okay. I'll be downstairs in a few minutes, I spent enough time today up here by myself." She smiled, lightly rubbing his shoulder before heading back downstairs.

The night went by a lot quicker with his mom and the TV distract him, but once she had gone to bed he found himself tossing and turning again. Occasionally he would fall asleep in short bursts, but that little amount of sleep made him feel worse when he would wake up again.

The next morning when his doorbell went off, he wasn't sure if he was dreaming or awake until he heard it again. Half asleep and blinking repeatedly to keep his eyes open, Sora dragged himself down the stairs and to his front door. Swinging it open, he greeted tiredly, "Hey, Riku."

Instead he saw Kairi, nervously holding her hands together in front of her. "Can I come in?" She gave a little smile.

Sora stared at her, his mouth hanging open. Shaking himself out of it, he moved out of the doorway to let her step in, "S-sure…"

"Thanks." She stepped in past him to take a seat on his couch.

'_Am I dreaming right now?_' Sora asked himself as he shut his front door. When he turned around again he saw Kairi staring at her lap, twiddling with the hem of her pale blue dress. When he sat down at the other end of the couch, she finally looked up.

"I'm really sorry about yesterday." She began, tucking a few strands of hair behind her ear as she spoke, "I just shut down… I couldn't believe you were actually there."

Sora shook his head, "It's okay. Don't worry about it. Listen…" He glanced around the room nervously before locking his eyes on hers, "Kairi, I'm really sorry that I didn't come home with you and Riku after we defeated Xehanort. King Mickey and Yen Sid asked me and I knew no one else would really want to do it. You'd all been through enough already. But still, I wanted to go back with you two so badly. And I spent so much of the first year wondering if I had really made the right decision. I know I did, but I still know I hurt everyone… I hurt you."

Kairi looked down, "You did, but… you did it for the right reasons. I was completely miserable when Riku and I first got home. But, as time passed, I realized how selfish it was of me to want you back just for my own reasons when you were out there helping a ton of people on other worlds." She let out a small laugh at herself.

"It's normal to wanna be selfish sometimes… I know I definitely wanted to, too." Sora moved a little bit closer to her, "Anyway, how've you been lately? Riku told me you've been going to the University."

She looked up, a little surprised but smiling, "Yeah. I'm majoring in art, thanks to Naminé. I hadn't really drawn anything in a long time before I met her so I had almost completely forgotten it was something I enjoyed doing. And of course, I didn't really have much time to dedicate it when we were out on other worlds so I only truly rediscovered it once I came back to stay. All of the classes are really fun and I love my professors too."

"Good, good." He nodded, smiling.

Tilting her head, she asked curiously, "Do you think you'll start taking classes soon?"

Sora scratched the back of his neck, "I'm still not exactly sure how exactly all of the high school stuff works out… I'm probably just going to have to get a job soon. Plus I'll still have to go off to other worlds here and there, but nothing like I've been doing; it'll be really sparse."

"Oh." Kairi answered quietly, unsure of how to respond.

He racked his brain for something to say, eventually deciding on, "Um. What time do you have class? I don't want to make you late or anything."

She looked past him to glance at the clock, "Yeah, I do have class in thirty minutes so I probably need to start walking." She stood up and turned towards the door.

"Alright." He got up and opened the door for her, "I'll see you later."

"Sora." She looked up at him, a few tears threatening to fall from her eyes as she collapsed against his chest and wrapped her arms around him, "I'm really glad you're home."

He was a bit shocked by the hug, not expecting it at all after how awkward their conversation had been. Closing his eyes and hugging her as tightly as he could, he answered, "Me too."


	3. Getting Settled

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Two: Getting Settled_  
_

"It definitely went better than I expected, yeah." Sora nodded before frowning, "Now I just have to figure out how and when to tell her I'm still in love with her."

Riku gave a big shrug, staring at Sora from an arm chair on the other side of the living room, "You got me there. I guess just try to work up to it gradually; in the meantime, get reacquainted with everyone else on the island."

The brunette sprawled out on the couch, "Yeah and I gotta try to find a job sometime soon, too. Talked about that earlier with Kairi plus I told my mom I would as well if I didn't go back to school."

He raised an eyebrow, "You're not going to try and see if you can take classes?"

"I will, but I just want to get used to being here again." Sora shut his eyes and cringed, adding, "Not to mention I could probably use some tutoring in just about everything before I try to take classes for real. They might even make me go back to high school and take classes before I can go to the university, I dunno."

Riku leaned back, nodding, "Ah, yeah. I didn't really think about that. What would you study in school, anyway? Just curious."

The younger boy shook his head, "No idea about that either. So yeah, it's definitely the best thing to just try and get everything figured out before jumping into it." Looking up towards Riku he asked, "What are you studying? I think I forgot to ask."

"Business." He replied simply.

"Gotcha." Sora replied with a nod, "I can see you doing that." Getting up from the couch and motioning towards the door, he suggested, "I can walk with you half way to the university if you want. Since I have nothing better to do, I got assigned to go grocery shopping."

Riku stood up, walking towards the door, "Sure."

Once they had both walked out the door and Sora had locked it, they both started down the path into town. Sora started out walking casually before realizing Riku was walking at a much more brisk pace. Speeding up, he asked, "Did I keep you too late?"

"What?" Riku turned his head to look at Sora, "Oh, no. It's just kind of habit." He slowed down a little.

"Okay, good. Just making sure." He nodded with a small smile, "I know you're trying to help me feel comfortable again, but I don't want you or anyone else to put me in front of all their other responsibilities. I'll be okay."

"I won't, school's definitely way more important than you." Riku teased with a tousle of Sora's hair.

Sora laughed, "You're joking, but it's true."

The older boy shook his head, "School is really important, but if there's ever a time where you really need me, you'd come first."

"Thanks, Riku." He gave a small smile, "I'd say I'd do the same for you but I don't have anything else important going on right now."

Riku laughed as well, "Don't worry. You will soon."

Coming up onto the entrance of the grocery store, Sora commented, "This is my stop. I'll see you later!" He waved.

"See ya." Riku waved back, continuing straight down the path and further into town.

"Hello!" The cashier greeted with a quick glance but didn't really look at him.

"Hey." Sora replied back, glad that they didn't really pay attention to who he was or else they would have caused a scene about not seeing him in forever. But of course that part would come anyway, once he went to the cash register to check out.

Absent mindedly grabbing a cart, he dug in his pocket for the list his mom had given him. Unfolding it and reading over it, he commented to himself, "Alright, got it." Making his way through the maze of aisles he grabbed all of the things on his mom's list with a few improvisations.

When he made it back to the check-out line, it went exactly like he thought it would. "Sora! I heard from your mom that you were home, but wow, you've really grown up since I last saw ya!" The man greeted him as Sora started unloading all of the groceries.

"Hey, Sam. Yeah, it's been a while." He gave a small smile.

"Your mom's already got you back at work, huh?" He joked as he scanned and bagged the groceries.

Sora shrugged, "Eh, it's the least I can do. I'd just be laying around the house otherwise."

"Ah, I see." He finished bagging the last of the groceries and hit a few buttons on the register, saying, "That'll be $42.50."

"Okay," Sora dug in his pockets and pulled out the $50 his mom had left on the counter for him that morning, "Here you go."

"Say hi to your mom for me." He requested as he handed the change back.

Sora nodded as he loaded up the grocery bags onto his arms, "Will do. Bye!" With that, he walked out of the store and started heading back towards his house until he heard a voice from behind him.

"Whoa! Sora, is that you?"

Spinning around curiously, he smiled as he saw Tidus, "Hey! Yeah, it's me. How's it going?" It was a little weird seeing how much Tidus had grown. He was definitely still very much a kid when Sora first left the islands and now he was just a bit taller than him.

"Good, good!" He grinned, "Man, I haven't seen you in _forever_."

"Yeah, I know… Sorry about that." He smiled apologetically, wanting to scratch the back of his neck but his hands were weighed down by the groceries.

Tidus shook his head vigorously, "Nah! Don't worry about it. What've you been up to since you've been back to the islands? Aside from, you know, that." He pointed at the groceries.

Sora laughed, "Not much… I've just hung around the house with my mom and Riku. Then I saw Kairi for a little while yesterday. I need to start looking for a job soon, though…"

"Hey, my dad could use some help at his construction company. That is if you don't mind working outside a lot—which I'm sure you don't, considering what you've been doing for the past few years." Tidus started to babble, "Unless you're tired of being outside too much—"

Sora cut him off, "Tidus." The blonde boy shut his mouth and stared at him intently as he continued, "That sounds great."

"Cool! Okay, just show up at the office tomorrow around 8. He'll find something for you to do." He motioned towards the town.

"Thanks! I really, really appreciate it." Sora looked down at the bags on his arms, "I probably need to get home while this stuff is still cold but yeah, thank you again. I'll see you around."

Tidus grinned and waved as he started to walk off in the other direction, "No problem! See ya."

The rest of Sora's trip home was fairly uneventful since most people were either at school or work, leaving the residential side of the island practically abandoned. Once he was home, as he walked through the front door, he noticed that there was a message on the answering machine.

"Huh." He commented to himself, wondering if maybe his mom had called him during her lunch hour to check and see if he had gone grocery shopping yet.

When he had gotten everything put away, he moved back to the front hallway and pressed the play button. Surprisingly, he heard Kairi's voice, "Hey, Sora. It's Kairi. Um, I was just wondering if you'd maybe want to go watch the sunset with me like we used to do? I think it'd be a good chance to catch up a little more. So if you wanna come, I'll be back at my apartment around four o'clock. It's in the Bay Tree apartment complex and I'm in building 206 apartment D. Hope I see you then! Bye."

Sora smiled to himself, wandering into the living room to check the time. She still sounded nervous and shy but at least she wanted to see him. That was definitely a plus.

Seeing that it was almost two, he sprawled out on the couch and yawned, "Looks like I've got time to take a nap."

Waking up about an hour later, he scrambled to make sure that he looked at least somewhat presentable. After throwing on a fresh shirt and trying to tidy his hair (and failing), he was out the door. Kairi's apartment complex wasn't too far from his house but he walked a little bit faster to be on time. In the past, Sora was pretty much always late, so Kairi was used to saying a time and not expecting him to show up until ten or fifteen minutes past. Having the chance for a fresh start, Sora was determined to change that.

Knocking on Kairi's door, Sora heard Selphie's voice call out in a sing-song voice, "Just a second!"

As the younger girl opened the door, he greeted cheerfully, "Hey, Selphie."

At first she was smiling but her face fell once she saw him. "Oh, it's you." She commented sourly.

Frowning, Sora stared down at his feet for a moment, unsure of how to respond. Looking back up, he just asked, "Is Kairi home yet?"

"No. And you should go home, Kairi doesn't want to see you." Selphie crossed her arms.

Sora furrowed his eyebrows, "She was the one who invited me."

The younger girl looked surprised before firing back, "She had a temporarily lapse in judgment."

"Selphie, I don't—" Sora began with a sigh before he heard Kairi's voice from behind him.

"Selphie! I can't believe you." She glared daggers at her friend.

She glanced between them, replying, "I can't believe _you_! I've seen you cry way too many times over him. I'm not letting you get hurt again."

Sora frowned, his heart sinking in his chest and ready to tell Kairi that Selphie was right until Kairi started talking. "It's my choice to work things out with him, okay? I'll talk to you later about this." She gently grabbed his wrist and pulled him towards the apartment, "C'mon, Sora. Come inside for a minute while I get changed."

"O-okay." He replied nervously, Selphie shooting him a disapproving look as she stepped out of the way and Kairi guided him to her bedroom. Closing the door behind them, they heard Selphie go to her own room and shut the door loudly.

Kairi looked up to him, frowning deeply, "I'm so sorry."

Sora shook his head, "Don't worry about it. She's just trying to be a good friend." It definitely still stung, though. More than he could try and put into words.

"Still. She didn't have to be so rude about it." She sighed before gesturing towards her bed, "You can sit down, if you want. I just definitely want to change into something new after walking back and forth around the island all day." She walked over to her closet.

He sat down on her bed, watching her and asking curiously, "You have to walk around that much for classes?"

"I have a job at the coffee shop too." She answered as she picked out a white dress, holding it in front of her as she turned back to him.

"Where's your uniform?" He tilted his head.

"There. I mean, it's just an apron on top of my clothes, basically." She pointed to her backpack that she had dropped on the floor after they walked into the room, "Anyway, I'm gonna go change. Just hang tight."

He nodded, watching her go out of the room, "Okay."

Once she had closed the door behind her, he glanced around her bedroom. Much to his surprise, it wasn't that different from when she still lived with her parents. She still had a color scheme of pink, purple and white and a few of the same movie posters still decorated her walls. She also had a few photos posted to the wall but he wasn't quite brave enough to get up and look at that part of her life that he'd missed.

"You ready to go?" Kairi opened the door and peeked her head in.

"Yeah." He nodded, jumping up from the bed and heading towards her. Once Sora was out the door and could see Kairi's entire outfit, he felt his face begin to grow a little warm. She had put her hair up into a messy bun and he could now see that her white sundress actually was covered by tiny little blue flowers. And he wasn't imagining things, she was quite a bit curvier than the last time he saw her.

Noticing his stare, she asked with a bit of a smile, "What?"

"You look really nice." Sora answered shyly, looking away.

They both heard a loud scoff from Selphie's room and Kairi rolled her eyes. "Thank you, Sora." She smiled brightly, "Let's get going." A small distance away from her apartment building, she sighed, "Again, I'm really sorry about Selphie. She's being so over dramatic."

Sora frowned again and started to drag his feet as they walked, "I guess you must have been really upset for a long time."

"I was… but you're here now, right?" She gave his arm a light touch, "Let's just focus on that right now. We'll talk about everything else sometime soon but tonight's supposed to be about fun, okay?"

With a small smile, Sora looked up at her and repeated, "Okay."

"Good." She smiled too and locked her hands behind her back as they walked. Letting a moment of silence pass by, she spoke quietly, "You know, I haven't been to the play island in a while."

"Neither have I." Sora replied jokingly and Kairi let out a small laugh, "But seriously, why not?"

She shrugged, "It just didn't feel right. It doesn't feel right alone and even when I went with Riku it just felt off. It really only feels right when I know all three of us are here at home."

He nodded along silently until they reached the row boats, "I would offer to take my boat, but mine's kind of out of commission. Glad you took care of yours even though you haven't used it. By the way, I can still row, if you want."

Kairi stared at him for a moment before answering, embarrassed, "Oh, sure. Thank you."

"Not a problem." He went to go untie the boat from the dock, Kairi lingering where was and twiddling her fingers. Pulling it closer to the shore and holding it steady for her, he called out, "Here."

"Thanks." She climbed into the boat and sat down on the side that pointed towards the water.

Sora climbed in as well before dipping his hands back into the water and shoving off from the shore. Beginning to row, he said, "So… I got a job."

Kairi raised her eyebrows in interest, "That's great, Sora! Where is it?"

"Helping out Tidus's dad doing construction work. Probably working on houses, I think. I've helped out once or twice before without getting paid so it'll be cool to get money for it for once." He finished with a laugh.

She giggled, "I'm sure."

"By the way, how's your job at the coffee shop?" He asked curiously.

"It's good. It's kind of hectic sometimes, but overall I like it." She smiled, further explaining, "My coworkers are nice and most of the customers are too. Though, occasionally you'll get the really picky people or you'll get the people who are in a rush to get to work and take it out on you."

He smiled apologetically, "Ugh, I'm sure that sucks."

She nodded, "It can, but thankfully those incidents aren't super common."

"How badly do you have to bite your tongue sometimes?" He teased.

She laughed loudly, answering, "Oh, man. Really badly. I definitely can't talk to them like I do to you and Riku or I would get fired."

Sora grinned, pausing his rowing for a moment, "I figured. I guess I'm glad I won't really have to deal with customers face to face like you do."

She shrugged, "It has its perks, too. But the first couple of times I got rude people, it did really ruin my day."

"Yeah, I'm sure." Sora replied before commenting, "We're almost there, we'll be at the dock in a minute."

Kairi turned around to look at the island, obviously surprised, "Wow, that was fast!"

"We were talking pretty much the whole time." Sora said as he rowed the last few times before the boat's bottom hit the sand.

A light blush appearing on her cheeks, Kairi commented, "Your upper body strength from using the keyblade probably helps a lot, too."

Glancing at his arms before getting out to tie up the boat, he replied sheepishly, "I guess so."

Climbing on to the dock, she stood over him and watched him, adding, "That was one of the first things I noticed after coming home; how strong my arms were. But unfortunately that went away really quickly." She finished with a small laugh.

"It's good I'm doing construction work, then. Hopefully I can retain it for a little while." He pulled himself up onto the dock.

"Mhm." Kairi nodded as they walked towards the end of the dock and took their seats.

Looking out over the ocean for a moment, Sora turned back to see Kairi had a wide grin on her face. Amused, he asked, "What are you smiling about?"

"It almost feels like I'm in high school again." She continued staring out towards the ocean, swinging her legs back and forth, "Like nothing changed at all."

"Oh." He didn't know what to say, looking away from her and switching his focus to his feet, "Yeah, I guess so."

"Sora?"

He titled his head back up, looking at her attentively, "Hmm?"

Kairi smiled at him briefly before looking back out over the ocean again, seemingly hiding her face, "Did you ever watch the sunset while you were out on other worlds?"

"Sometimes, yeah." He nodded, "But the one here at home is definitely the best. It's way more beautiful than any of the others."

"Hmm… Is that so?" Kairi replied, but he wasn't sure if she was just acknowledging his answer or if she was really asking.

Unsure of how to respond yet again, Sora looked down beneath the dock for a minute before saying, "I think I'm gonna go in the water."

Kairi squinted, "Right now? Did you even bring swim trunks?"

"No." He shook his head, "But it wouldn't be the first time I swam in my clothes so why not? I haven't had the chance to do any swimming yet, so it's just really tempting."

She studied him for a moment before shrugging, "I mean, I won't stop you if you really want to."

"Alright, I'm gonna go for it." He laughed, lifting his shirt and teasingly throwing it at Kairi.

She let out a squeak as the shirt covered her face, "Hey!" She quickly threw it down onto the dock and crossed her arms.

Sora laughed before jumping down onto the sand and then wading out into the water, "It's actually a pretty good temperature. Sure you don't want to join me?"

Kairi eyed him suspiciously but smiled, "Considering my options are A. swim in a white dress which is pretty much the same as option B. swimming in my underwear, I'm gonna have to say the answer is no. I'll take a rain check."

"Alright, but you're missing out." He laid on his back, letting himself float on top of the water.

She shook her head, "I'll be okay." Sora watched as she lifted her legs back onto the dock. She then stood and jumped down into the sand, continuing, "I'll just get my feet wet."

He raised an eyebrow suggestively, "That's how it always starts…"

Kairi rolled her eyes, "Shush. Unless you drag me all the way, I swear it's all I'm doing." Pointing a finger at Sora, she warned, "And don't you dare try."

He threw his hands up defensively, "I won't, I won't."

She stared at him intently, "Promise?"

He stared back for a moment, serious, before his lips curled upwards into a grin, "No, I can't promise."


	4. Growing Up

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Three: Growing Up

Receiving a glare from Kairi in return, Sora continued, "Okay, I'll promise that I won't pull you in… but I won't promise that I won't splash you."

She rolled her eyes, smiling and coming a few steps closer to him, "I guess I'll take that." The waves now coming up to the hem of her dress, she commented, "You know, this might be one of the last weeks that the ocean's still warm. Fall's getting pretty close."

"I know." He sighed, returning to floating on his back, "I wish I would have come home earlier."

Kairi noticed he used the word 'would' instead of 'could' but decided not to linger on it for very long. Instead, she asked in a laugh, "Can you believe you're going to be twenty years old soon?"

"No," He tilted his head slightly to look at her, "Can you?"

She shook her head, smiling, "Not at all. But Riku's already twenty-one and he still seems like the same old Riku, so I guess it's not so bad."

Sora blinked and paused, letting his feet drop down to the ocean floor. "Wow… I hadn't even realized that. I mean, I knew that; I knew that when I looked at the calendar on his birthday. But my brain never really transferred it over after seeing him in person again."

"By the way, you owe us a few birthday presents mister." She put her hands on her hips.

"Maybe I could actually afford that by the time your birthday comes around." He laughed, "We'll see how this job goes."

She looked down at her feet, splashing around the water absentmindedly, "I'm just teasing you."

"I know. But maybe I'll surprise you." He replied, repeating, "Maybe." Looking at the sky and over at the main island to see the street lights were coming on, he commented, "It's getting kinda dark. We should start heading back."

"Okay." She nodded, before squinting at him, "Wait, you're not going to splash me at all? I'm surprised after you made a big deal of not being able to promise you wouldn't."

Sora shrugged, wading over to the boat, "The sun's almost all the way down, you'll be shivering the entire time we're walking home if I did it now."

"That's really considerate of you, Sora." Kairi commented in a soft voice as Sora brought the boat around for her. He was still the same old Sora, but he had definitely grown up too, Kairi thought.

He smiled sheepishly, holding the boat steady for her, "Uh, thanks, I guess."

"You're welcome." She replied as she stepped into the boat and took a seat.

Aside from the sound of Sora rowing, they shared a comfortable silence most of the way back to the main island; occasionally flashing quick smiles to each other.

After they had tied the boat up and started walking towards Kairi's apartment complex, she groaned, "Ugh, I have to start on a paper when I get home to and I really don't want to."

"We could go get something to eat first if you don't want to go home yet." He motioned towards town.

She shook her head smiling, "Thanks, but I've pushed this paper off one too many times already."

"Oh. I see how it is," Sora replied overdramatically, "You used me to avoid your paper."

Kairi rolled her eyes and shoved him playfully, "I definitely did not!"

"Yeah, yeah." He waved her off, "Whatever you say."

As they approached her door, she twiddled her fingers together, "Guess I have to go be productive now."

"And I guess I get to go home and lay around, doing nothing." Sora teased with a grin.

"Lucky you." She shook her head, "But you should try to go to bed early so you can be well rested to start your job in the morning."

Sora's eyes widened, "Oh yeah, that's right. Good idea."

"No problem." She and Sora stood there for a moment, just staring at each other.

His eyes darted around to look at everything but her, wondering, '_Does she want me to make a move or what?_' They'd only kissed once so he didn't really know any sort of body language that hinted towards that sort of thing. But she was just looking at him as if she were expecting something.

Feeling nervous and awkward, Sora started to lean forward and shut his eyes before he felt Kairi's head against his shoulder and her arms loosely around his waist, "Hope your first day goes well. And see you tomorrow; same time, same place?" She questioned.

'_Guess not?'_ He thought to himself, confused. "Um, thanks. And yeah, sounds good. Good luck with your paper and… I would say to say bye for Selphie for me but I don't know if she wants to hear it." He hugged her back awkwardly.

She let go of him, groaning, "Yeah, I've still got to talk to her about that… Don't worry, though. She'll warm up to you again soon."

"Hope so. Anyway, I'll see you later, Kairi." He started to turn to leave.

"Bye, Sora." He heard her reply softly before knocking on the door to be let in by Selphie, who spared Sora from another snide comment even though he was still in ear-shot.

Glancing behind him, he watched Kairi disappear behind the closed door. '_I wonder if that was bad timing, or if she changed or mind… or if I just really have no idea what I'm doing._' He stuffed his hands in his pockets, still damp from the ocean water.

When he reached his house, he opened and closed his front door loudly and announced, "I'm home!"

As he walked into the kitchen, his mom caught one glance of him and said, "I'm guessing you went to the beach."

Sora smiled sheepishly, "Yeah. Went to watch the sunset with Kairi. I'm assuming you saw I went grocery shopping, right?"

"I would joke that you took the $50 and went on a shopping spree somewhere but I don't think there's any shops here that have anything you like more than food." She tousled his hair.

"You got that right." He laughed, "Oh! By the way, I ran into Tidus after I went grocery shopping and I'm going to start working with his dad tomorrow morning."

She hugged him tightly, "That's great news, honey." Stepping back, she waved a finger, "Just make sure you're always paying attention while walking around; there's a lot of power tools running all around you."

He inwardly laughed, thinking heartless were a lot more dangerous than power tools, but he knew his mom had good intentions. "I know, I know; I will." Sora stepped backwards pointing towards the stairs, "I'm gonna go upstairs and change."

She nodded, moving back towards the sink and working on dishes, "Okay. I finished dinner a little while ago so you'll probably need to reheat it."

"Okay, no problem. Thanks!" He headed up the stairs, hearing her call back 'you're welcome'. Shutting the door and grabbing the first t-shirt, boxers, and pajama pants he could see out of his dresser, he shrugged out of his wet clothes and changed into the new ones.

Once he was at the top of the stairs, his mom heard him and called up, "Did you hang up your wet clothes?"

Sora froze, slowly responding as he turned back towards his room, "…No." After hanging up everything on the towel rack in the bathroom, he headed down the stairs; slightly embarrassed. "Sorry, some old habits die hard I guess." He apologized as he passed his mom on the way to the kitchen.

His mom shook her head, "It's okay. I figured that one might slip your mind, but you have been really helpful lately. Don't put yourself down too much."

"Thanks. And… yeah, I'm really sorry I wasn't more helpful around the house when I was younger. Especially after Dad died and you had to do everything by yourself." He paused and looked up at her.

She gave a grateful smile, "It's okay Sora, you were a teenager. I'm glad that you got to have to have a lot of fun with your friends and go on your own adventures." Smirking, she continued, "But now that you're an adult, it's time to pay back your debts."

"Hey, I'm still a teenager for a few more weeks." He pointed out with a wave of his finger.

She laughed, "I guess you get to use that excuse for a little bit longer, then."

"Shouldn't have said that, I'm totally going to abuse it now." He grinned, heading into the kitchen to grab a plate.

As he scooped the leftovers onto his plate and popped them into the microwave, she replied with a snap of her fingers, "Oh well. A few more weeks won't kill me."

Sora laughed, taking out his reheated food and sitting down at the dinner table to continue the conversation with his mom. Once he had finished eating, he promptly washed his dish and headed upstairs to go to bed early as Kairi had suggested. Seeing that it was only 9:30 when he set his alarm, he figured he was going to have a hard time falling asleep that early.

But to his surprise, he fell asleep not long after his head hit the pillow. When his alarm went off the next morning, he still felt a little groggy but nowhere near the amount he would normally be feeling. '_Thanks, Kairi.'_ He thought to himself.

Rushing through his morning routine, Sora quickly headed out the door after his mom wished him luck on his first day. Making it to the office with fifteen minutes to spare, he nervously knocked on the door. Once it opened, he started to greet, "Hi, Mr.—"

"Sora; Tidus told me you were coming by. And no need to be so formal, just call me Jecht. After all, you're a man now." Jecht hovered in the doorway, neither inviting Sora in or stepping out.

"Err, right." Sora was unsure how to respond, not exactly used to being recognized as a 'man' as opposed to a 'young man' or 'boy'.

"If you're not quite a man yet, you definitely will be after a few weeks of work here." Jecht let out a deep laugh before stepping out of the door and closing it behind him, "Either way, you've definitely done a lot more than my boy has."

Sora bit his tongue. He didn't know much about what Tidus had been up to in the past few years, but in the past he'd always tried hard to please his dad and it never seemed to pay off. Sora assumed it was the same thing going on now and as much as it irritated him, he knew it definitely wasn't the right time or place to bring it up.

Motioning him forward, Jecht continued, "I'll let Wakka teach you the ropes since you two already know each other pretty well." They walked past a few houses that were close to being finished but had a few minor details left until they finally reached a house that was only three/fourths of the way finished. Pointing, he said, "He's probably around back. I'll let you get started."

"Thanks." Sora answered, already feeling unsure of this as Jecht began to walk away. Carefully edging his way around the house, careful to avoid any wires or cables on the ground, he eventually caught sight of Wakka.

Once the loud buzz of the miter saw that he was using had stopped, Sora greeted, "Hey, Wakka."

He looked up curiously before a large grin took over his face, "Sora! Nice to see ya. Tidus said you'd probably be around today."

Rounding the cutting table, Sora asked curiously, "So do you work here full time or just part time?"

"Full time; I use all the rest to practice blitzball. They make it sound like I'm not too far off from making the team, I just gotta keep at it." He grinned enthusiastically.

"That's great." Sora smiled as well.

"What about you?" Wakka motioned toward the younger boy, "You going to school too?"

The brunette shook his head, "Nah. It's too late plus I have quite a bit of catching up to do, so I'll be working full time as well for the next few months."

"Gotcha. Well, at least we've got each other and with you around, I'm not the newbie anymore so I appreciate it." Wakka laughed loudly and patted him on the back, "Guess we should get to it."

Sora laughed, "Guess so…"


	5. Just Like Old Times

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Four: Just Like Old Times

His shoulders aching and his clothes covered in sawdust, Sora managed to drag himself across the island all the way to the dock where he found Riku and Kairi waiting.

"Hey," Sora greeted, out of breath and bent over slightly with his hands on his knees, "Glad you could make it, Riku."

The older boy tried to hold in a laugh but failed, "I could say the same to you. Jecht worked you too hard, huh?"

Sora shook his head, "More like Wakka. I saw Jecht for all of ten minutes." Riku walked closer to him and gave him a heavy smack on his back, to which Sora let out an audible, "Oww…"

Ignoring the questioning look that Kairi was giving him, Riku commented, "It's just a different kind of work than what you've been doing. You'll get used to it soon."

Stretching out and then rubbing his back, the brunette replied, "I hope so."

"So," Kairi stepped in between them, "You two ready to go?"

"Sure." Sora looked back and forth between her and Riku, "Who am I going to bum off of today?"

Kairi quickly pointed in Riku's direction who shrugged, "I guess I can pity you today. You should really get your boat fixed, though."

"I will, I will. Geez, Riku. You must have gotten used to me being around again since you're not being nice anymore." He stuck out his tongue.

Riku chuckled, "Something like that." Getting his boat ready, he added, "I'm not going to be able to stay for very long, though. So you're gonna have to catch a ride back with Kairi."

"I think I'll be recovered by then." Sora flashed a smile to her, "So I won't make you row back, promise."

"Thanks. But I will if I have too." She smiled back.

Once they had all gotten farther out into the water and Kairi was a bit behind them, Sora asked Riku, "So why do you have to leave early?"

"The sunset's been you and Kairi's thing for a while now, you know. Plus I'm sure you want some alone time with her." His eyes flickered over towards the red head as he responded in a low voice.

Sora glanced over at her too, but she was too focused on rowing to notice either of them. "I mean, I do." He answered honestly, "But I haven't seen you in three years, either."

"Yeah, but all's good between us." He replied back, "I'm not going anywhere and for the most part, you're not going anywhere. Or at least you'll be coming back here more often, so we'll catch up with each other. You and Kairi have more stuff you need to work out, so focus on her for right now."

The brunette gave a soft smile, "I guess you're right… and I dunno if I told you, but Selphie hates my guts for what I did to Kairi. I know Kairi seems okay with me at the moment but yeah, that still stung a bit."

"She's probably just being overprotective, but either way, just try to ignore her. If Kairi's making the effort and wants to be around you, that's all that matters. Selphie will see that being around you makes her happy and she'll let it go." Riku consoled him.

Noticing that the island was getting closer and Kairi would catch up to them soon, Sora replied, "I'm just worried that even if she's happy right now, it might not stay that way. But we can talk about it later. She's probably gonna overhear if I keep going."

"Gotcha." Riku nodded.

The two boys docked the boat and stood on the other side of the dock, waiting for Kairi. Once she had caught up with them, they all began to walk towards the little island with the paopu tree. "So what were you two chatting about the entire time?" She moved between them.

"Nothing much. Just how school's going and stuff." Riku replied right off the bat and Sora was extremely thankful. He was absolutely terrible at lying and Kairi would probably have known something was up if he answered. But Riku, as always, was calm, cool and collected.

"So how are your classes going, Riku? I feel like you're so busy I hardly ever see you for more than five minutes." She asked curiously.

He laughed, "I could say the same about you. They're going well but they're definitely not getting any easier, that's for sure."

"I know the feeling." She sighed, "But I still have enough time to come out here and hang out with you two, so I guess I can't complain too much."

Pausing, Sora asked quietly, "Do you think there'll be a point where you can't anymore?"

Kairi shrugged, "I mean… I'll always come if I can. But I'm sure there's going to be some days where I have to be somewhere else."

"And the same goes for me." Riku echoed as they crossed the bridge and reached the paopu tree.

"That's good." Sora let out a sigh of relief to himself, "But come to think of it… I guess there'll be times when I'm not here either. But it's okay, that just means I have to just appreciate the time I have with you guys even more."

Everybody took their usual spots as Riku replied with a nod, "Right."

"So what sort of adventure should the three of us plan for next? Pretty much everything is been there, done that." Kairi swung her legs back and forth.

A smirk took over Sora's face as he turned to her, "I dunno, but I hope you have more realistic expectations for how much food we'll need."

Kairi let out a gasp and playfully slapped his shoulder, "Shut up! It's not like you two argued with me about it."

"Hey, Sora. I recall Kairi having to remind you that we needed fresh water and not salt water, so you can't talk much." Riku chimed in.

"Oh yeah? Well you—you…" Sora tried to snap back at him, but failed, "Damn. I can't think of anything."

Riku laughed and crossed his arms, "Yeah, cuz I was constantly working on building the raft, unlike you two slackers."

Sora had slumped his shoulders in defeat before Kairi pointed out, "But you managed to find time to swordfight and race Sora."

"Touché." Riku nodded in acknowledgement while Sora felt his face grow a little warm, remembering the deal that he and Riku had made.

Of course the whole thing seemed extremely stupid now, especially since they hadn't even asked Kairi how she felt about the whole thing. She probably would have smacked them both if she had found out they'd essentially bet on her.

The trio continued to pick on each other, bringing up moments that they each remembered fondly and ones that made the cringe until they laughed it off. There were never any awkward silences, despite the time that they had spent apart and that, more than anything, made Sora feel like he was truly at home again.

"I thought of the next adventure." Sora commented suddenly.

Curious, Kairi stared at him, "And what's that?"

"Just growing up; becoming adults." He answered softly, "That's crazy enough on its own."

Kairi let out a little laugh and looked back out into the ocean, "True."

"On that note," Riku stood up straight, "I guess I need to get home and get some work done."

"I just turned in a paper today so I'm free." Kairi stretched her arms out excitedly.

"Rub it in, why don't you." Riku rolled his eyes jokingly, "Anyway, I'll see you two later."

They both gave small waves, "Bye, Riku." "See ya!"

Noticing the sun was really low in the sky, Sora realized Riku actually stayed later than he thought he would. "It's going to be completely dark by the time we reach the main island, even if we left right now." He pointed out.

Kairi shrugged, still looking out at the ocean and the sunset, "It's okay. Since I moved out of my parents' house, I don't have a curfew anymore."

"Right." Sora nodded with a small laugh, "But still, is there a certain time you wanna be home by?"

"Not really. Just as long as it's before midnight so I can get some sleep." She replied with a turn to him.

"I definitely need sleep too, so not a problem." He smiled before asking curiously, "But do you think we'll really be out until midnight?"

Kairi's face fell as she looked back out into the water, "Well, you know how yesterday I said I wanted to talk about everything later? I don't want to push it off too long, so I'd rather just get it over with… if that's okay with you."

Sora's eyes widened and his lips parted, "Oh." Letting out a breath of air, he answered, "Yeah, that's fine."

"I guess I'll start." Kairi let out a deep breath of air as well, continuing, "When Riku and I first got home, I was just in shock. I knew deep down inside what you meant when you said you weren't coming home for a while, but I wanted to believe that maybe that meant a few weeks. Or even a few months. But time kept going on and on and the pain just grew deeper and deeper the longer that you weren't here."

Sora's frown deepened as he noticed Kairi's fists were now clenched and he saw tears threatening to fall from her eyes. "Everything we'd been through and even you just started to seem like a dream." She held her hands in front of herself, "I used to summon my keyblade almost every night to try and remind myself that everything was real and that you were coming back. And sometimes I wished that if I kept summoning it, maybe something would happen and I'd find some way to try and get to you instead."

"Kairi…" He wanted to touch her shoulder or just comfort her in some way, but he wasn't sure if that would only make her more upset.

"Eventually I just tried not to think about you, so I started dating other guys…" She admitted quietly, "But that didn't work for obvious reasons. They would always get fed up after a few days or a week at most. I did manage to have one somewhat healthy relationship, but that just dissolved too. We were better as friends. Anyway… I had thought I had forgiven you and accepted the reasons of why you couldn't come home. But seeing you again for the first time just made me feel everything all over again and then I felt guilty for all of the things that I had done to try and get over missing you all at once. And to be honest, I had only just gotten used to the idea of you not being around, so needless to say it was overwhelming."

He smiled sheepishly, trying to let that all sink in, "Yeah, I would say so."

Kairi motioned towards him, "And now it's your turn."

"There's really not a whole lot to tell, despite how much time I spent away." He answered honestly, "I did get to see some new worlds, but I spent a lot of time revisiting others. Heartless were pretty few and far between, I was just basically making sure that worlds were rebuilding themselves and not running into issues with any inhabitants who got funny ideas. But if I wasn't busy doing something, more than likely I was staring at your good luck charm. I thought about you all the time. I mean, I thought about everybody here at home too. But with you, there were just so many things still up in the air."

Kairi was quiet for a moment before she asked jokingly, "No other girls?"

He smiled and shook his head, "No other girls."

Kairi laughed nervously, looking down twiddling her fingers, "Wow, I feel kinda even worse about that now."

"Don't." Sora replied quickly, causing her to look up.

"It's not disappointing or weird for you at all?" She questioned.

Sora shook his head again, "Not really. I was still your first kiss." Pausing and laughing sheepishly, he added, "Plus I didn't have to actually see you with anyone else so… that makes it easier."

Kairi giggled a bit before sliding closer to him and calling, "Sora."

"Hm?" He watched her intently.

"I love you." She placed her hand over his, "I've known that for a long time now. But I've been too scared to say it. I thought about saying it in the moment before Riku and I were separated from you, but it didn't feel right. And now I'm glad I waited, because this definitely feels right."

Sora beamed; all of the guilt and worry that he had built up over the past three years all vanished within that instant. "I love you too." He shifted and Kairi expected that he was leaning in for a kiss, but instead found him dropping from the paopu tree onto the ground. Lightly grabbing her hands and slightly kneeling, he spoke softly, "You already know that I'll still have to leave home sometimes, but I promise that I'll always try to come back as soon as possible. You've done way more than enough waiting."

"I appreciate it, but don't rush yourself. I don't want you to get hurt." She looked down at him with a small smile.

"Of course." Sora nodded, adding, "And whenever you're free, you and Riku could always come with me too. I know it's a little complicated because of your classes and jobs, but just throwing it out there."

She held onto his hands as she slid off of the paopu tree and joined him on the ground, "That sounds great." She took a step closer and motioned for him to let go of her hands.

"Heh." He laughed nervously as he complied, her arms moving up to wrap around his neck. Once he had his arms lightly around her waist, he opened his mouth to say something else but Kairi quickly shushed him and guided him down to her.

It was a little awkward at first, Sora only faintly remembering what their kiss was like before, but Kairi was patient. Once they had developed a rhythm that worked, the kiss quickly intensified. As Kairi parted her lips to give him entrance, Sora held her tighter almost in desperation. He had missed her for so long and it was one thing to say it, but he was starting to think that this was a much better way of expressing it. Kairi's hands had since moved to Sora's hair, running through it and occasionally stopping to pull him even closer till the point that there was no longer a gap between them.

Eventually she was the one to break the kiss, resting her head on Sora's shoulder as she tried to catch her breath. Sora, however, continued to pepper a few more kisses on her forehead and on her cheeks which caused her to go into a short giggling fit. "You don't know when to stop, do you?" She looked up at him with a wide smile.

He kissed her one more time, answering, "No." Pausing for a moment, he asked, "Since you made it sound like you don't want to go home until later tonight, how about dinner since you blew me off yesterday?"

Kairi rolled her eyes with a laugh, "I didn't blow you off, I had a paper to write; remember?"

"Same difference." He replied jokingly, retreating his arms backwards a little bit but keeping his hands on her sides as he asked, "So?"

She looked up in thought, as if she were debating the options in her head. "I dunno, that means I have to be seen in public with you. I was hoping this whole thing would be kinda secret." She replied in a teasing manner.

"Oh, I see how it is." Sora played along, his arms dropping back to his side as he turned, "I guess I'll be going, then." He took a few steps towards the bridge before Kairi caught one of his wrists.

"I'd love to." She answered seriously, slipping her hand into his.


	6. A Different Way of Life

**I laid out an outline and decided there was quite a bit more I could do with this story so I've officially decided to continue it! I don't have a set amount of chapters right now, but I should be continuing to write this for at least a few months. **

**Thank you for your continued interest and welcome to any new readers! **

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Five: A Different Way of Life

He was thinking it was a bit odd that it was so quiet as he walked to work. Even this early in the morning, there were usually saws running or at least a few workers talking to each other as they tried to plan out what they wanted to do first or else just talked about what was going on in their lives. He had heard it almost every day when he walked to school.

It was only when he finally got to the site of the house and saw literally no one there that he realized, "It's Saturday…"

Destiny Islands was anything but rapidly expanding; they had to build a few new houses here and there, but there was hardly ever a rush to complete them. A decent chunk of construction work was usually dedicated to house modifications but it all depended on who needed what first since there was a limited amount of workers. Because of that limited demand, construction work hardly ever took place on the weekends so that the workers could have a decent amount of time to relax and give their all to every project when they returned.

"Wow, guess I could have slept in…" Sora commented to himself, turning around to head back to the main path. As he walked, he thought, '_It's really nice when the island's quiet and peaceful like this._'

He'd never really gotten the chance to admire it before. Sure, he was up this early whenever he had to go to school, but he was too tired to really even pay attention.

'_Maybe this is why Riku and Kairi both like the mornings so much_.' He smiled to himself. Taking a few more steps back towards his house, he paused in the middle of the road and thought, '_Actually, maybe I should go see Riku at his house. He's always been coming over to mine and I still need to tell him what happened yesterday.' _

He continued, diverting down another path once he got closer to his house. Riku's house was fairly close to his, but it was quite larger so it was on its own farther back from where Sora's was with several others. Riku's house was even bigger than the mayor's house so most important events and holiday parties often took place there, but Riku's parents were great friends with the mayor and his wife so it was no problem at all for them. And since Sora was always over at Riku's house as a kid, once the mayor had adopted Kairi and brought her over all the time as well, the three of them became inseparable. If they weren't at his house, Sora's dad had taken them over to the play island.

He knocked gently on the door, figuring Riku was probably awake but he didn't want to ring the doorbell and wake up his parents as well.

Hearing the door click and seeing it start to open, he heard Riku's confused voice, "Sora?"

"Hey!" He greeted cheerfully.

"What are you doing up this early?" Riku asked, laughing a bit in disbelief.

Sora had to laugh at himself as well, "Uh. I kinda thought I had work this morning. I didn't really think about what day it was."

Riku shook his head and waved him in, "C'mon." The brunette stepped in and followed him into the kitchen where they both sat down at the table.

"So wait, you left early yesterday to work on a paper on a Friday night?" Sora squinted at him.

Riku shrugged, "Yeah? I'm I was trying to get some of it done so I don't have to do everything Sunday night before it's due." Folding his arms on the table, he asked, "So how'd it go after I left?" Sora smiled widely and before he even spoke, the older boy commented, "Alright, I think I can guess. So you're dating now?"

He nodded, "Yeah. After you left, she told me about everything she was feeling after I left and why she reacted the way she did when she first saw me. I dunno if I'll ever really be able to completely forgive myself for hurting her so badly, but I'm just glad she's willing to trust me again. Even just as a friend would have been good enough, honestly. So when she said she loved me, I was blown away."

"She said it first?" Riku gave a small laugh, "Figures, Kairi always was a step ahead."

Sora pouted and fired back, "I didn't want to say it at the wrong time and make her feel awkward! I was trying to work up to it gradually, like you said to me before. And anyway, I kissed her first. Er, I mean, at least I did 3 years ago…"

"Wow." He snickered a bit.

The younger boy rolled his eyes, "Anyway… So, yeah. I know everything's not gonna magically be perfect and I know three years is a really long time so there's a lot we still have to catch up on, but we'll just have to take it as it comes."

"Well, I'm definitely happy to hear you have pretty realistic expectations." Riku answered seriously with a nod, "I figured you were probably going to be a hopeless romantic and think everything was fixed."

Sora smiled and shook his head, "Nah. I'm optimistic, but I'm not stupid. I am almost twenty years old, remember?"

Riku laughed and put a hand to his forehead, "You and twenty years old don't belong in the same sentence."

"I know I've missed out on some stuff, but yeah. I've aged." He joked back, "I know it's hard to believe. But hey, it's hard to believe you're twenty-one too."

"Believe me, I know. I even forget sometimes."

"When'd we get so old? Being mature? Forgetting things? We're practically old men already."

The two boys laughed for a minute, interrupted by a light knocking on the doorframe.

"Good morning." Riku's mom greeted from the doorway. She was a very small and slender woman with straight silver hair that went just past her chin.

"Good morning!" "Good morning." Sora answered a little more enthusiastically than Riku before realizing his volume, "We didn't wake you up, did we?"

She strolled into the kitchen and gave Sora a half hug from where he was seated in the chair, "Not at all. It's great to see you again."

"Nice to see you too." He hugged her back as best as he could.

She let him go and moved over to the stove to start preparing herself breakfast, Riku calling, "So, hey Mom. Sora and Kairi started dating."

"Who would have guessed?" She answered with a hint of sarcasm, turning around briefly to add, "I'm just teasing. But really. I think everyone saw it coming."

"So I've heard." He laid his face on the table and stretched his arms out across it in an over dramatic fashion, "Even my own mom's response was just 'finally'."

Riku laughed again, "Sorry, Sora. It's just too easy to read your face."

He let out a groan. Sitting up, he said, "Well, speaking of my mom, I guess I should head home and see if she needs me to do anything since I'm not working."

"Sure you don't want any breakfast?" Riku's mom questioned sincerely.

He shook his head, "I ate before I left this morning. Thank you, though." Getting up out of the chair, he waved to Riku, "See ya. And make sure to tell your dad I said hi, as well." He started to leave.

"See ya." He heard Riku's echo from behind him.

Once he was out of Riku's house, he cut through a back alleyway to get to his backyard's gate. Sliding open the back door, he heard his mom's amused voice, "Did you really go to work this morning?"

"Yes…" He answered bitterly, sliding the door closed before he walked into the living room where she was sitting, "Give me a break. It's been years since I've paid attention to week days."

"Guess that's true. Sorry." She smiled, watching him begin to sit down on the arm chair across the room.

Once he had plopped himself down, he asked, "So, got anything else for me to do today?"

She shook her head, "No, not really. The grass probably needs to be cut in a few days but it's fine for now. That's really the only thing since you went grocery shopping already." Shrugging, she added, "I guess you could sweep if you get really bored."

"Yeah, I can do that." He volunteered, putting his elbow on the arm of the chair and resting his face against his palm, "I might try to catch up on a little bit of the sleep I missed this morning, though."

"Not a bad idea considering you were out somewhat late last night." She replied before continuing with a question, "Speaking of, are you seeing Kairi today?"

"Yeah, supposed to meet at the dock for the sunset as usual." Sora replied automatically, moving his arm back to his lap as he considered, "But I guess I could leave earlier and meet her at her work."

His mom raised an eyebrow, seemingly disapproving, "As long as you don't distract her from doing her job."

Sora scoffed and jumped up from the chair, "I'm only gonna go in like ten minutes before the end of her shift! Plus I wouldn't get her in trouble, that would make me feel terrible." He headed towards the stairs, "Any way, I'm gonna go get some sleep. Maybe when I wake up you'll have a little more faith in me." He turned his head back slightly to call out.

She just laughed, answering back teasingly, "We'll see."

Once he had climbed up all of the stairs and headed into his room, he kicked off his shoes and went to collapse on top of his bed; not bothering to close his door behind him. He wasn't exhausted by any means, but his bed was comfortable and it seemed like there wasn't much else to do.

Besides, when was the last chance he got to actually be lazy? And how long would that last?

Thinking that over, he closed his eyes and turned over onto his side. When he woke up, it was almost two in the afternoon and he was starving.

Walking down the stairs, he noticed it was extremely quiet again, save for the birds chirping outside. His mom wasn't really one for just sitting around so he figured she must have gone out somewhere. For a walk on the shore or around the island, into town to do some window shopping or real shopping; there was no telling with her.

After throwing together a sandwich and munching on it while watching TV for a bit, he pulled out the broom from the closet in the hallway and started sweeping. With as much sand as everyone brought in constantly, most places on Destiny Islands only had wood floors to make it easier to clean. Riku and Kairi's parents both happened to have one of the few with carpets but only on the second floor and needless to say he was amazed the first time he saw them.

He finished the kitchen, living room, hallway and the stairs before he realized it was about time to leave. Since it seemed like his mom wasn't even that concerned with it getting done, he figured it probably wouldn't hurt to leave their bedrooms until tomorrow. Since the temperature was probably going to drop quite a bit once the sun went down, he decided to quickly change into jeans before heading out the door.

The coffee shop wasn't too far of a walk as it was one of the first things that came into view as islanders walked into town. Since everyone had to walk in the same direction to get to their jobs or school, it only made sense to put it where people would pass it every single day.

It usually wasn't as busy in the afternoon but Sora saw a few people sitting in the shop through the window as he walked towards the door, noting that most looked like college students who needed a pick-me-up after a long day. He opened the door slowly, setting off the little bell that hung above.

"Welcome!" He heard a few voices come from the counter.

Kairi was busy making someone's order while Noctis was taking another and Serah and Vanille were staring at him intently. Noctis was Riku's age so he didn't know him very well but had seem him around, Serah was in the same year as him and Kairi so he knew her pretty well from classes, and Vanille was a good friend of Selphie's that he had met a few times.

"Hey," He greeted a little nervously, "Can I just get some water?" He wasn't really a coffee person and he had just eaten not that long ago but it seemed rude to just order nothing.

"Sure." Serah answered, turning around to grab a cup.

He looked back over to Kairi who had just passed over the coffee cup to the customer. Once she turned and saw him, she flashed a bright smile, "Hi."

"Hi." He mirrored her before he saw Serah slide the cup of water towards him out of the corner of his eye. "Thanks." He took the cup and went to the closest corner of the room, sitting at the booth there.

"Is that really Sora?" He heard Vanille ask in a loud whisper and glanced back over to the counter, all the girls gathered at the other side while they worked on restocking things.

Kairi gave a little laugh of disbelief, "Yeah. Isn't it obvious?"

"I mean, I know no one else on the islands has hair like that, but still. He was so dorky and now…" He looked down and sipped on his water, not wanting to get caught looking, but still listening as Vanille finished, "He's hot."

The girls all laughed and he grinned to himself, his ego boosted.

"Better be careful what you say, Kairi and him just started dating." Serah warned her teasingly.

"I was just making an observation. He's not really my type." Vanille replied simply, "But congrats to you both! I know you really missed him and I'm sure he's happy to be back."

He peeked back over there to see Kairi smile shyly, nodding, "Yeah."

"Little help over here." Noctis interrupted them, nodding towards a new customer about to come in through the door. Vanille dashed over to the other side of him to help while Kairi and Serah continued organizing the cups, still talking to each other but they were a bit quieter now.

Sora had taken to looking out the window, watching the groups of high school kids going in and out of the shops and the people walking home from work while he idly drank from his cup. When he felt hands on his shoulder, he jumped a little bit before looking up to see Kairi giggling. Smiling himself, he commented, "It sounded like you guys were having fun."

"I figured you probably overhead." She answered with an embarrassed smile, "Vanille never has been the quietest."

"I heard stuff like that all the time about Riku when we were younger, so it was kinda cool getting to be the focus for once." He admitted, pausing to add, "Though I didn't really appreciate the dorky part."

"You're still dorky to me." Kairi slid her hands off his shoulders and stepped to the side of the table, his eyes watching her as she said, "But that's part of your charm."

"Hmm." Sora started to slide out of the chair, "So are you ready to go, then?"

She nodded, "Yeah." Once he had stood up and they began walking towards the door, she asked, "By the way, is there a reason you came early?"

"Sort of…" He trailed off, feeling the eyes of Kairi's coworkers on him, "I'll tell you in a minute."

Her eyes flickered over to the counter, curious, but agreed, "Okay." She looked back again to wave at them all, "Bye!" Sora also added a small wave. Once they were outside, she immediately questioned, "So what is it?"

He managed to keep her walking towards the dock though she was dying to know, "It's just something stupid that I've already been picked on about a couple of times today. Nothing serious."

"Just tell me." She whined, purposely bumping into his side.

"I went to work this morning." He answered simply.

"So—" She realized only a moment after she had begun, "Oh. It's Saturday."

He nodded, "Yeah. I didn't even think about it. I haven't had a weekend in forever."

"You never had any days where you didn't have anything to do?" She questioned curiously.

"I mean, yeah. That happened every once in a while. But I haven't had certain planned out days of the week in years." He finished loudly and over dramatically, "Anyway, since I was already up, I just went to Riku's house for a little bit. Then I went home and slept some more before sweeping my house."

Kairi looked at him intently, "So you told him."

"I didn't even say a word, he just guessed." He answered truthfully, giving a small laugh, "He said the reason no one's surprised is because it's so easy to read my face."

She giggled as well, "It is kind of true."

He smiled back at her as they approached the row boats. Once they had set sail for the play island, his face fell a little bit as he asked, "So did you tell Selphie?"


	7. Realizations & Changes

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Six: Realizations &amp; Changes

Kairi locked eyes with him and sighed, "Yeah… I did."

"I'm guessing she didn't have a very good reaction." He continued to row.

She looked out into the water, looking a bit sad as she said with a small laugh, "She called me stupid."

Sora's arms froze in place, though the boat continued to move from the current. His eyes washed over her as he considered what to say, eventually deciding on, "She didn't mean it. She's just mad at me and taking it out on you." He started to row again as he finished.

"Either way, _she's_ the one being stupid." She crossed her arms and huffed, "I can hardly even get a word in when she goes off on her rants. If she would actually listen to me she wouldn't be acting this way."

"I guess all you can do is keep trying, right? In the meantime, just try to take it with a grain of salt when she says stuff like that." He suggested softly, looking back up at her to say, "I'll try to talk to her again, too, if she'll let me. I didn't do a very good job defending myself last time since I wasn't completely sure of how you felt. It didn't seem too out of the question that you might have changed your mind about wanting to see me."

Kairi shook her head and laughed, "We were best friends for over 12 years before we defeated Xehanort and I came home. You really thought I was just going to let all of that go?"

Sora shrugged, defending, "I dunno. I knew you were hurt and that I'd been gone a long time. I didn't know how much had changed. How much you changed. I wouldn't have blamed you if you didn't want to be around me." He paused, remembering how much that thought haunted him upon his return, "It would have hurt me, yeah, but I would have done whatever was best for you."

"Even if I wanted to try to ignore you, I would have given in eventually. I can't stay away from you for too long." She smiled, "I mean, you saw that. Kind of. I tried to run away from everything at first, but I ended up going to your house the next morning."

He smiled widely in return, continuing to row till they reached the play island. As they got out of the boat, Kairi asked, "So have I changed?"

"Huh?" He questioned back, as he went to take his seat at the edge of the dock.

She sat next to him, "You said you didn't know how much I'd changed. Have I changed?"

"Not a whole lot. Not that I've noticed, yet." He answered automatically, looking out over the ocean at the sunset. Looking back at her, he added, "Personality wise, anyway. You've changed a bit physically."

Kairi looked a bit surprised and concerned, "I hope that's a compliment."

His eyes widened, answering sheepishly, "It is! It definitely is." Smiling a bit to himself, he admitted, "It made it _that_ much harder when I saw you for the first time. I was already terrified and had no idea what to say. Seeing you only made it worse."

"Hm." She acknowledged with a bit of a smirk.

"So what about me?" He questioned back.

She titled her head, "What?"

"Have I changed?" He watched her curiously.

Kairi looked away again, "You're a little different. More mature, more cautious." She looked back him, smiling sweetly, "But that's not necessarily a bad thing and I can tell at the core you're still the same."

He hummed, taking in her answer. "And physically?" He asked a moment later.

"Wasn't Vanille's description good enough?" She replied in a mumble, embarrassed.

"No," Sora shook his head, "Those were her words. I wanna hear what you think."

Her eyes flickered to him momentarily before looking down at her lap, "You're nicely toned. I mean, you always have been, but just slightly more than before I guess. I don't know." She fumbled with her words.

He laughed, "Anything else?"

"I guess not." She replied, her face red, "You got a bit taller I guess. At least your hair didn't get any messier."

Running his hand through his hair, he answered jokingly, "I don't think that's possible to begin with." He smiled at her, adding, "And thanks."

"You're welcome." She answered quietly, still a bit sheepish.

"Sorry, I was just curious since I just kind of blurted it out about you." He lightly placed his hand over hers.

She smiled appreciatively before leaning towards him, their shoulders touching, "It's okay."

They both looked out across the ocean at the sunset, sitting in silence until Sora asked, "What do you wanna do tonight? Since it's apparently Saturday." He added sarcastically and Kairi laughed.

"I don't know. I don't really want to go back to my apartment and deal with Selphie yet…" She bit her lip. After a moment, she asked, "What do you think about staying out here after the sun sets?"

"I mean, we can. It'll be pitch black, though." Sora shrugged.

Kairi slid closer to him, putting more of her weight against his arm, "We can make a fire if we need to. C'mon, it'll be fun."

"Okay." He agreed, "But you should have told me to bring marshmallows and stuff. A fire's not as fun without s'mores and everything we need is about forty five minutes away in that direction." He held out his arm towards the main island.

"We'll be alright." She slipped her hand out from underneath his and began to stand up. "Walk with me?" She questioned before jumping down from the dock.

Sora followed her wordlessly, jumping down onto the sand. A little ways down the shore, she surprised him a bit when she reached over for his hand but he quickly complied, his fingers intertwined with hers.

It was kind of funny. He'd worried for so long about doing anything that might pass the best friend boundary and would make her uncomfortable that now, when he was free to do that sort of thing, he didn't even really think about it.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked softly as they continued walking.

Sora smiled a bit, answering, "The kind of stuff that makes me dorky, I guess."

Kairi giggled, "And what's that?"

"I was so awkward around you for so long because I didn't want to do accidentally do anything that would make you feel uncomfortable. Because your friendship was way important to me than my feelings. And I feel like I spent so long doing that, I'm absolutely terrible at trying to make the transition from best friends to a couple." He looked over to her, "You've initiated pretty much everything."

She closed her eyes and smiled, "You're over thinking it."

"What a surprise." Sora commented sarcastically, laughing at himself.

"It's not any sort of drastic change. Most of the time, it will be just like it was before. But as for initiating stuff, don't force it just because you think you should do something. Just let it happen when it feels right; like you putting your hand over mine on the dock." She looked up at him, "You wouldn't have done that before. But you were comfortable enough to do it now that you didn't even think about it. It's just like that."

He nodded thoughtfully, "Hmm. I guess so."

"You'll get the hang of it. I'm still working on it, too." She admitted, using her thumb to rub the back of his hand comfortingly.

"I guess it's just like Riku said, the thing about me being an open book. I forget everyone else isn't like that, so I always think that I'm just missing something while they're all perfectly comfortable with the situation." He laughed, "I guess I just have to remember everyone else has their own problems, too."

Kairi smiled and nodded, "Yeah, some people are better at hiding it than others, but everyone's got something. It's always better to be upfront and honest about it because it'll honestly save you a bunch of grief in the long run, so it's really not a bad thing that you're so open about everything."

"Thanks, for all of that. I needed it." He came to a stop, locking his eyes with hers with a small smile.

She shrugged, still smiling, "You're welcome."

"I'll go ahead and take a little bit of your advice now." He used his free hand to pull her closer. Realizing what he was doing, she grinned a little wider and closed her eyes as he leaned in towards her. He kissed her tenderly and slowly, relishing the feeling. Aside from the small peck that they'd shared when Sora dropped her off at her apartment, the last time they kissed was so rushed. It'd been built up over so many years that they were both desperate and there were a lot of different emotions involved. But this time, he knew he had all the time in the world and he wanted to take advantage of that as much as possible.

He pulled away first, not wanting to overdo it again even though Kairi hadn't particularly minded. As he pulled away, she pressed against him and hugged him tightly, whining into the fabric of his shirt, "Ugh, I just wanna stay out here with you but we both need to eat dinner."

Hugging her back, he answered, "If you still don't wanna go home, you could always come over to my house for a little while." Turning his head a bit, he admitted, "Mom might be a little mad at me for not telling her ahead of time, but she'll still be happy to see you."

"You sure that'd be okay?" She leaned back to look at him.

"Yeah, of course. She loves you and Riku both."

She pulled herself away and turned around, starting to head back to the dock, "Let's get going, then!"

"That was fast." He trudged along after her, almost tripping in the sand as he turned around.

"I'm just a little bit hungry now, so I know I'll be almost starving by the time we get back. Plus we've still got a teeny tiny bit of sun left at the moment to make it easier to get back to the main island." She answered loudly, not bothering to turn back to look at him as she did so.

He shrugged, "Whatever's best for you."

She titled her head back and looked at him, stopping for just a moment, "Did you wanna stay longer?"

He held his hands up, "Not really? I'm sort of hungry too. But I couldn't really leave you alone out here, either."

"You should have told me." She turned back around with a frown, walking a bit faster, "Don't make yourself uncomfortable just because I didn't feel like going home yet."

"I would have told you if it was _that_ bad." He put a hand on his hip, watching Kairi untie the boat, "I'm fine. Really."

"I hope so." She replied with another glance to him, sitting down in the boat once Sora had reached down to hold it steady.

Once he had gotten in as well and rowed a small amount away from the island, he questioned, "So, what are you doing tomorrow?"

"I've probably gotta start studying for a test…" She sighed, "You're lucky you get the weekends off. I mean, the coffee shop never stays open any later than seven, so I always get a portion of the day to myself, but still. I wish I always had all of Saturdays to myself like I used to in high school."

He reminded her, "You will, when you start a full time job and don't have to balance work and school anymore."

She slumped, "But that's so far away and so… intimidating."

He gave a small, sheepish smile, "Yeah, you got me there." He looked out into the water, mumbling, "I still don't even know what I want to do."

"You'll figure it out. You can just do Gen Ed classes and a few classes in different departments till you find something you like." Kairi reached out and rested her palm on his knee comfortingly, "By the way, when are you going to talk to someone from the high school?"

He shrugged, "Sometime this week. I'll probably have to go sometime during one of my lunch breaks or something." Giving a little laugh, he admitted, "I'm nervous about that too. Whatever they're going to make me do."

She shook her head and smiled, "Don't be. Riku and I are going to help you with anything and everything you need."

He nodded appreciatively, "Thanks."

"No problem. We may just have to be studying for our own classes while you're doing your own work too." She admitted as they came in towards the dock.

"Understandable." He agreed before getting out of the boat to help Kairi out as well. Once he had accomplished that, he tied it to the dock and they started walking towards his house. "I still need to fix my own boat too." He commented with a laugh.

Swiftly intertwining her hand with his, she replied, "You just got home, you don't need to rush. Just take it one thing at a time." She bumped her shoulder lightly against his as she continued, "And I don't really mind having to use my boat. We've both been leaving and coming back at the same time so we haven't really needed two."

Sora gave a slight nod, "Yeah, I guess that's true."

The island was dark now, the street lights only illuminating the pathway in small patches as they walked. They didn't say much, probably because they were both getting pretty hungry and Sora's house wasn't far. But along the way he found himself captivated by the way the lights caught her hair and faded as they walked out of their reach. Even in the dark, her hair was unmistakably red, but he'd never really paid attention to how many different shades it could be.

She caught him staring and blushed, but didn't say anything other than a soft "C'mon." before tugging him forward.

Sora's mom spotted them as they walked up the stairs of the front porch, swinging open the screen door and greeting Kairi immediately with a hug. Though, just as expected, she snuck a glare in towards Sora for not telling her that Kairi was coming and he just shrugged.

"Come on in and help yourself to whatever you like." She ushered Kairi in with a light tap of her back.

"Thank you." Kairi smiled sweetly before making her way towards the kitchen.

Sora lingered in the door way, apologizing, "Sorry. Inviting her over was sort of a last minute thing."

"It's okay. I'm just giving you a hard time." She gave him a little shove forward as well, "Go ahead and go get dinner."

"Thanks." He moved forward while his mom shut the door behind him.

He had almost made it halfway through the living room before his mom called out his name, "Sora."

"Hm?" He spun back around.

She moved closer to him and put a hand on his shoulder, smiling, "I'm glad everything worked out with you two. I was really worried about you when you first came home but when you were walking up the porch, I think that's the happiest I've ever seen you."

He smiled sheepishly and scratched the back of his neck, "Yeah, I'm pretty happy. But… I've still got a lot of other stuff to worry about, unfortunately."

"One day at a time." She replied, reminding him of what Kairi had said earlier, "You can go eat now. I'll be in here when you guys are finished." She sat down on the couch.

"Okay." He flashed another smile before grabbing food from the kitchen and joining Kairi at the dinner table.


	8. Birthday Wishes

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Seven: Birthday Wishes

He'd spent a while thinking about this wish.

Every birthday in the past he'd always thought of something on the spot or had something that he already wanted. But he was already home and Riku and Kairi were right there with him, singing as his mom placed a chocolate cake in front of him. There really wasn't a whole lot that he wanted more than that; to be at home and with his friends and family.

He had a few worries, though. The high school had called earlier that morning to say that he would be able to take a test for his diploma. They'd need about two weeks to compile something together since they'd never really had a situation like this before and Sora was completely fine with that because he desperately needed the study time. Once he had finished that, he had to worry about applying to the university as well. And on top of all of that, he started to notice people whispering around him whenever he was out in the town. Some even seem scared of him, much to his dismay.

If he was by himself, he'd do his best to keep his distance and do whatever he needed to do as quickly as possible. If Kairi was with him, though, she'd glare daggers back at them before urging Sora to take his time and reminding him that he had just as much of a right to be there as they did. When he talked to Riku about it, Riku suggested that the idea of being to so many different worlds scares them in combination with the fact they don't really understand what exactly a keyblade is and what it does. He also added that there were some people who still weren't very fond of him or Kairi but most had gotten over their worries after they went back to school and everything continued as normal.

'_I wish for this year to go smoothly_.' He blew out the candles on the cake and everyone clapped. "Now it's time for the best part." He joked with a wide grin, rubbing his hands together. He wasn't sure if wishing on a birthday cake would actually help change anything, but it sure didn't hurt. After all, he got to eat it afterwards.

"How's it feel to be twenty?" Kairi asked as his mom set down a piece of cake which he immediately started digging into with his fork.

"Not much different." He took a bite, asking with his mouth full, "How's it feel to be the only teenager left?"

After saying thank you for her own piece of cake, she replied smugly, "Just fine. I'll catch up to you soon enough."

"Besides, it's not like you can really call yourself an adult yet, Sora." Riku chimed in and everyone laughed, with the exception of Sora.

He pouted, but he agreed. He certainly didn't feel like an adult at all even though he'd spent so much time out on his own. He'd always had help, be it from Donald or Goofy or various residents of the worlds he was visiting. "Guess I'm just stick in limbo." He finished off his piece of cake and folded his arms behind his head, "But I think that's okay with me."

"Just don't turn back into an actual kid, I don't think I have the energy levels to handle that." His mom replied with a ruffle of his hair.

He laughed, "That would maybe be nice for like, a day, but I'm good where I am." His mom flashed a smile before heading into the kitchen, making Sora ask, "You're not gonna eat a piece?"

"Later!" She answered back loudly.

Turning back to Riku and Kairi, he tilted his chair backwards, "So when should we start doing these crazy cramming sessions?"

"Tomorrow morning, if you're up for it." Riku shrugged, "I've got some research to do for a paper so I'll read my books in any spare time I get."

Sora nodded and looked to Kairi who answered, "I can do tomorrow morning."

"Sounds like a plan. And we can have left over birthday cake for breakfast." Sora let his chair fall back onto all fours.

Kairi clapped excitedly while Riku made a noise of disgust, mumbling, "I'll pass. Too much chocolate for so early in the morning."

"C'mon, Riku. You're no fun." Sora teased, sticking his tongue out before continuing, "Don't take the adult thing too seriously."

"I think that's a code meaning that I'm gonna have to keep you two slackers in line tomorrow." The older boy crossed his arms as he looked at his two friends.

Kairi grinned first, "Probably."

"Jeez." Riku shook his head before standing up, "Guess it'll never end, no matter how old you two get."

"Nope." Sora stood up as well, flashing a smile.

"In that case, I better get going so I can mentally prepare myself." He hugged his younger friend, "Happy Birthday, again."

Sora hugged him back, "Thanks."

As Riku turned away, Kairi added, "I should get going too." She leaned in towards Sora and he expected that she was going to kiss his cheek. Instead, he found her whispering into his ear, "I'll meet you upstairs."

"O-okay." He smiled nervously, his heart beginning to race. She flashed a smile back as she pulled away from him and turned to leave.

Sora's room was fairly easy to get to even though it was on the second story thanks to a large tree right next to his house so Riku and Kairi had been sneaking into his room for years. But this was the first time in a long time and this time was the first time Kairi had ever been more than just a friend, and that was what made him nervous.

He didn't watch her as she left the room, instead focusing on collecting the dirty plates off the table to try and calm himself down. He walked into the kitchen and rinsed off the plates in the sink before putting them neatly in the dish washer. As he stood back up, he announced loudly without looking at his mom, "I'm gonna go to bed so I can get up early to study tomorrow."

His voice was believable; it was just his face that was always a dead giveaway when he was lying.

"Goodnight, sweetie. Happy Birthday." He heard her reply.

He turned around to flash a quick smile and answered, "Thanks. Goodnight." With that, she went back to reading her book and Sora went up the stairs.

He opened the cracked door and saw Kairi seated on his bed, her legs folded underneath her and her shoes on the floor. Taking a step in and locking the door behind him, he moved towards his bed and sat down next to her. In the past, normally have sat in the chair at his desk but he was still trying his best to be a little more forward, at least in small ways like this.

"Are you nervous?" She asked quietly as he sat down.

"Huh?" He jumped a little bit, turning to look at her.

"Are you nervous about the test?" She repeated, resting her weight on her left arm to lean closer to him.

He smiled, feeling a bit relieved by her clarification, "Yeah. I am."

"It's okay to be, it's a big thing." She scooted closer to him, bumping into his shoulder, "But you'll be okay. You're gonna get plenty of help."

He turned his head to look at her, smiling again, "Thanks." She smiled back and he looked away briefly before he couldn't hold the question back anymore, "So, did you have any particular reason for wanting to come up here?"

She laughed to herself, leaning back and commenting, "So you're nervous about that too."

Sora gave her a bit of a frown in response. "Y-Yeah." He admitted begrudgingly and flopped down on to his back.

She nudged her knee against his side playfully before laying down on her back as well, keeping a small gap between them and resting her hands on her stomach, "I don't want to do anything to makes you uncomfortable. I guess it was sort of silly to think we'd sort of just pick up where we left off."

Sora turned over onto his side, leaning over her as he said with a small laugh, "Kairi, I would have still been a nervous wreck around you even if I had come home right away. Because I don't want to do something dumb and lose you. And I guess maybe I am more nervous because of how bad things were when I first got home, but either way… you're not doing anything wrong." He kissed her cheek, "So don't worry about that."

She looked up at him, locking her eyes with his, "We're both going to make our fair share of mistakes. That's unavoidable. I'll get upset, you'll get upset; but we'll work through it and move on. Unless your personality does a 180 and you become a completely different person, you're not gonna lose me."

He smiled sheepishly, "Maybe one of these days that'll finally sink in."

"I'll remind you until it does." She reached up and put her hands on both sides of his face, guiding him down. He complied, using his right hand to support himself as he leaned over her and caught her lips underneath his. The kiss started out slow and sweet, Sora making sure to keep the small distance between them. But once Kairi moved her hands around his neck, tracing his jawline on the way, he had all but forgotten worrying about that; his skin tingling as her fingers passed over. He deepened the kiss and she had no objections, pulling him just a bit closer. He used his other hand to lift himself back up again, slowly and as subtly as possible in order to not break the kiss. Once his right hand was free to move, he mimicked her by running his fingertips down her side, lightly brushing her bare skin from where her shirt had been slightly pushed up before stopping at the top of her jeans. He felt her shiver a bit and smile into the kiss for a moment before she pulled back.

He lifted himself up slightly, though his one hand remained at her hip as he watched her. "I should get going so I can be back here tomorrow morning. I'm gonna run by my parents' house, too, so I can go get some of my old books." She retreated one of her hands back to her chest, the other stopping to rest on his shoulder as she spoke.

"Okay." Sora answered, not sure of anything else to say.

Her other hand left his shoulder and his hand slid off of her as she sat up. As she leaned over his feet to grab her shoes from the floor, Sora sat up and pushed the window open for her. Placing her shoes outside on the tree, she turned back to give him a peck on the lips, "Goodnight."

"Goodnight." He watched her as she exited and climbed down the tree, making sure that she made it back to the ground safely before closing his window again. Once she was out of sight, he sunk back down into his bed and felt how warm the sheets were where she had just been. Smiling to himself, he pulled the comforter up to his neck and turned over, easily drifting off to sleep.

The morning wasn't quite as peaceful, as he was awoken by the sound of Riku dropping what sounded like twenty pounds of books on top of the desk next to his bed as he called out loudly, "Rise and shine!"

Sora groaned and pulled the comforter over his head, ignoring him. Riku didn't say anything else but he heard the light shuffling of feet against his floor and assumed that it was Kairi. Just as he was about to peek out of blankets, he let out a loud noise as Kairi sat on his stomach. "C'mon, you've gotta get up!" She called as she easily ripped the blanket out of his grasp, pulling it down to just below his neck.

"It'd help if I could breathe a little." He mumbled back, his voice strained. She rolled her eyes and stood up, looking down at him with a hand on her hip as he gasped for air dramatically. As soon as he had sat up, Riku placed an open book in his lap. Looking up, he asked desperately, "Can't I at least eat breakfast first? And wasn't my door locked?"

"We have keyblades, Sora." The older boy answered without even looking up before glancing to Kairi. She bent over to reach into her tote bag, draped on the back of Sora's chair.

"Right…" He blinked and rubbed his eyes, tired.

Kairi pulled out a plastic box with a blueberry muffin and placed it beside the brunette, "So you can study and eat at the same time. I grabbed it from my work yesterday before I came over." She leaned in closer to his ear and whispered not so quietly, "We'll have cake later when Riku's distracted."

"The sooner you get started, the sooner you can take a break and eat all the cake you want." Riku cracked open his own book and sat down at the desk.

"Alright." He sighed, starting to look down, "So what am I starting with, anyway?"

"History." Kairi sat down next to him, "We figured it'd probably be the easiest thing to refresh."

He nodded, starting to read a little bit as he asked, "Makes sense. When are we doing math, though? That's probably gonna be the worst."

"We'll do that last so it's the freshest thing in your memory when you go to take the test." Riku looked over to them, "We'll do a few review days for everything else, too."

Sora looked at his friends briefly, smiling as he looked back down, "Almost sounds like you two could be teachers."

"Basically, for the next two weeks, we are." He glanced up at her and she grinned mischievously as she added, "So pay attention!"

Sora grinned as well and Riku looked up once again, warning, "Stop flirting or I'll make you sit on opposite sides of the room."

"Yes, Master Riku." Sora mumbled sarcastically and Kairi giggled.

The older boy sighed and touched his forehead in annoyance, "Ugh, not that again."

"Sorry, I had to." He looked back down again, "I'll be serious now. Promise."

And he was; especially once Kairi had started on her work, as well. Sora asked for clarification every once in a while, but it was mostly smooth sailing. Kairi even ended up falling asleep after she had finished her homework due to Sora's lack of questions, curled up on his bed with her shins pressed against his back as he continued reading.

When Riku finally called for a break, Sora stood up as slowly and carefully as he could, not wanting to wake her up. But he didn't make it past before the doorframe before he heard, "You're going to eat cake without me?"

"I thought maybe you needed to catch up on some sleep." He shifted back towards her, watching her sit and up and raise her hand up to her mouth in a yawn.

"I probably could use the extra sleep, but I'm okay." She answered as she slid off the bed, walking across the room and right past him as she finished, "I'll have more energy after I get something to eat."

Sora nodded and followed after her, wondering if there was another reason why she wasn't sleeping well or if she was just too busy between school, work, and now helping him. From the way she and Riku were talking, it sounded like they had been doing a decent amount of planning without him. '_Wonder how much time that took them_…' He bit his lip, feeling a bit guilty.

"Alright, what's your problem?" Riku asked immediately as he walked into the room, staring at him intently.

His eyes widened, "Huh?"

"What are you worrying about?" Riku crossed his arms and Sora felt Kairi's eyes on him as well.

Sora looked down at the floor and smiled sheepishly as he looked back up at his friends, "Just… Thank you, guys, for doing all of this for me. I know you're both really busy, so it means a lot."

"We've always got time for you." Kairi touched his arm lightly before looking to Riku, "Right?"

"Yeah." He nodded, adding, "Besides, you saw us. We're still getting work done so it's not like we're wasting time or anything." Catching a small glare from Kairi, he corrected nervously, "Not that helping you is a waste of time. It just—ugh. You know what I mean, Kairi. Stop looking at me like that."

Sora laughed and she softened her expression as he replied for her, "I know what you mean."

"Thanks, Sora." Riku answered appreciatively before turning back to the kitchen counter, "Well, hurry up and eat, guys. We've gotta get back to work soon."

"Yeah, yeah…" The younger boy sighed. Noticing that Kairi was unmoving, he reached behind her and gave her a little nudge forward. She turned her head and gave him a confused look to which he responded, "You go first."

She blinked before giving a small smile, "Oh, thanks."

"Are _you_ okay? Seems like you're in a daze." He kept his hand lightly at her back, taking a step closer to her.

"Just a little tired and hungry, like I said." She took a step forward and he let his hand fall back to his side as he watched her move towards the fridge.

He leaned over the open fridge door as she looked at her choices, crossing his arms over it as he responded, "If you say so."


	9. Facing The Challenge

**Author's note: I'm back in North Carolina now and though I'm not quite settled yet, I'm pretty close so hopefully I'll get back to frequent updates for both this story as well as **_**Sea &amp; Sky.**_** Thanks for your patience and support! **

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Eight: Facing the Challenge

Studying had its good and bad days. He worked the hardest with Riku; mostly because Riku was always checking up on him. Kairi usually did a fairly good job, but sometimes she would get too wrapped up in her own work or she and Sora would distract each other. He did the worst by himself, even though he had done a lot better than he ever had in the past. But thankfully his friends didn't let him do a whole lot of that; they only made him study flashcards for vocabulary words as well as being responsible for reviewing the material they'd already covered before their review sessions where they tested him.

Even though he was fairly comfortable with everything, he still felt extremely nervous as he sat in the empty classroom and waited for the proctor for the exam to come in. He felt a little awkward being back at school, as well, after realizing that he didn't even know anyone going to the high school anymore. Thankfully they had asked him to come in a Saturday since they didn't have a place to test him on a normal school day. If there had been students around or a lesson going on the background, he wasn't sure if he'd be able to focus. Especially if any were to start whispering like some people in town did.

He stared out the window, tapping his pencil against the desk until he finally heard the door open.

"Sora," He looked over to see his teacher from sophomore year, a man of medium height with very lightly spiked black hair, "How're you doing?"

Sora grinned widely and greeted, "Mr. Hanekoma! I'm great. It's nice to see you."

"Nice to see you too." He put down a cup of coffee on the desk before holding out a manila folder in Sora's direction, "You ready for this?"

Sora let out a small laugh, laying down his pencil on the desk, "Heh, I hope so." He felt a little more relaxed now. Out of all the teachers at the high school he could have gotten to proctor his test, Mr. Hanekoma was probably the best person he could have gotten to calm his nerves. Mr. Hanekoma was one of the very few teachers that had often gone out of their way to make sure Sora understood the material completely whenever he asked for help. Some of the questions he asked would often leave teachers frazzled and they would give him answers that left him even more confused, but that was never the case with Mr. Hanekoma; he always had a way to simplify things.

"Now's the time for any last minute questions." He held the folder in place, waving it slightly side to side.

Though he deeply considered it, he smiled and answered truthfully, "I think I'm okay. Riku and Kairi have been helping me."

Mr. Hanekoma put the folder on the corner of his desk and sat down on top of it, "You're still pretty close with them?"

"Yeah." He nodded.

"That's nice. It's pretty rare to have such good friends like that; you're lucky."

Sora grinned widely, "Definitely. The luckiest person in all the worlds." He faltered a bit, "Well, at least I hope so. Luck would definitely help for this test."

Mr. Hanekoma let out a loud laugh before asking, "So I guess that means you want to get started before you let your nerves get the better of you, right?"

He nodded, "Yes, please."

"Alright." He slid back onto the floor and took the test out of the manila folder before turning to Sora, "I'm gonna catch up on some grading while you're taking this but feel free to ask any questions if you need to." Putting the packet down on Sora's desk, he added with a smile, "Of course, I can't answer them _for _you, but other than that, I'll see what I can do."

"Thanks." Sora smiled back. Without further ado, he picked his pencil back up and opened up the test as Mr. Hanekoma headed back to his desk. Seeing that the three questions on the first page were all fairly easy math questions, he let out a little sigh of relief. Flipping through the packet some more, he found a few pages where he knew he might have issues, but overall felt pretty confident. '_See, this isn't so bad.'_ He told himself, starting to work on the first question.

And it wasn't, for the most part. The material he had studied carried him through a good majority of the test, though he came across a few questions here and there that completely blind-sided him. He also asked Mr. Hanekoma for clarification for a few things, but even that didn't help for a few. Thankfully, they were pretty well mixed in with other questions that he was comfortable with so he never got too shaken or discouraged.

But regardless of how well he thought he had done, he still felt that little bit of doubt growing bigger and bigger with each step that he took away from the school. By the time he made it to Kairi's work to meet up with her and Riku, he was feeling like a nervous wreck again.

Of course Kairi's first question was how it went, to which Sora sighed as he sat down, "I dunno. Okay, I guess."

Riku crossed his arms, seated across from him, "What do you mean just okay?"

"Well, most of it was easy. But there were some parts where I didn't know what I was doing." Sora folded his arms across the table and leaned forward to rest his chin on top of them, "I more than likely passed but… it's just scary because it's so important. Like, what if I _didn't_ pass?"

"You just study some more and take it again." He felt Kairi's hand on his back and tilted his head to look at her as she continued, "We'd just keep working with you until you did pass. But I'm sure you did."

"I hope so." Sora mumbled before perking up a little bit, "Oh yeah. Mr. Hanekoma was the proctor. I don't know if he'll be the one grading it, though."

Riku shook his head, "Probably not. It'll most likely be the principal or someone on the school board since it's for your diploma."

"Ugh." Sora groaned and leaned forward again, hiding his face.

Kairi rubbed his back lightly while questioning, "How hungry are you?"

"Starving." He answered without looking up, his voice muffled.

"Riku, let's take him out for lunch." She slid her hands across Sora's back and grasped his shoulders lightly, "To celebrate all of his hard work and to help him relax now that the test is over."

The older boy nodded, "So where do you wanna go, Sora?"

He tilted his head upward, a grin on his face, "Where do you think?"

Riku shook his head and let out a small laugh as he got up, "Alright, let's go."

Kairi took a step back and waited for Sora to get up before joining hands with him and pulling him forward, a smile still on his face.

Sora would eat practically anything, but he always preferred quick and easy food in a relaxed atmosphere. So naturally, his favorite place on the island was a simple burger shop and he would suggest it anytime Riku or Kairi asked where they should eat.

After ordering and waiting at the counter for a few minutes for their food, Sora was practically bouncing to the table once the tray had been passed over to Riku. "See. I knew this would cheer him up." Kairi elbowed Riku in the side, careful to avoid the food he was holding.

"Hurry up!" Sora called out, now seated.

"Maybe a little bit too much." Riku mumbled to Kairi and she laughed, trailing along behind him as they made their way to the table as well. After he sat the tray down and Sora began to eagerly stuff his face with his burger, Riku asked again, "So, now that you're feeling better, how do you think you did?"

"Okay." The younger boy repeated, eating a few fries.

"Really?" Riku's shoulders dropped.

"Even if I feel better now, it's still like I said." He took a few more bites of food, continuing with his mouth full, "It's important, so I'm nervous." Swallowing, he looked between his two friends and finished, "If you and Kairi think I passed, then I probably did. But I don't want to guess for myself."

Riku gave a small smile and ate a few fries as well, accepting his answer, "I'll quit bugging you, then." Kairi nodded as well.

Sora smiled sheepishly, feeling a little guilty, "It's okay. I know why you're doing it. But I'm just telling you that you're always going to get the same answer."

"And that's fine." Kairi bumped her shoulder against his before taking fries from both Sora and Riku, "Now both of you relax and enjoy your food or I'll enjoy it for you."

"Not cool." Riku pulled his food closer to him.

Sora immediately retaliated by taking some of Kairi's fries, a disbelieving look on her face as he said, "Now we're even."

Kairi let out a gasp before grabbing more fries from Sora who tried to push her arms away but struggled, to which Riku commented from across the table, "C'mon, guys. We're in public."

Sora faltered and Kairi ate the fries successfully, beaming at the brunette while his face was now in a pout. Copying Riku, he moved his things away from Kairi and closer to himself. "As long as you don't take anything from me, I won't take anything else from you." She commented, taking a bite of her own burger.

"But you started it." Sora mumbled back, eating his food as well.

"Jeez." Riku sighed.

Kairi continued to eat contentedly, while the brunette would steal glances over to her to make sure she wasn't getting any more ideas about stealing his food. Once she and Riku had finished eating, Sora made a comment, "I this was supposed to be a stress free lunch?"

"I think you'll survive." She stood up and threw away her trash, Riku and Sora both following after her.

"Guess you'll have to find out." He replied, moving around her and heading out the door.

Rolling her eyes, she ignored him and asked instead, "So what did you want to do now?"

"Honestly, I think I'm gonna go home and sleep. I'm exhausted." Sora stretched his arms out and yawned, "I'll hang out with you guys tomorrow, if you're free. Then it's back to working for Jecht on Monday."

"I just need to do some work at night." Riku answered from behind him.

"Same thing for me." Kairi echoed.

Sora swung his hands behind his head, "That's fine. I'm sure I'll want to go to sleep early tomorrow, too. My body needs to recover from all this studying."

"Tsch." He heard Riku let out from behind him.

Sora lowered his arms back down to his side, turning back slightly to respond, "Hey, I haven't done any sort of school work in years. Give me a break."

"You're just letting your laziness get to you." He answered back, "You were fine once you got into the rhythm of things."

"Just because I did it doesn't mean that it wasn't exhausting." The brunette whined, moving his hands to his pockets.

Kairi moved closer to him, "It is exhausting. But hopefully it'll be less so when you get used to doing it again."

"Hm." Sora hummed in response and the trio continued down the path in a comfortable silence until they reached the path that led off towards Riku's house. The younger two stopped and started to turn before Riku walked through the gap between them.

"See you tomorrow. Call me when you're up." He glanced to them both.

Kairi nodded, "Kay."

"Okay." Sora answered as well before the older boy began to head down the path. Turning back and catching eyes with Kairi, he smiled and started to walk again. After another minute of walking, he stopped again and looked at her, "Well, guess I gotta go too."

She put her hands on his shoulder and stood on her toes, kissing him briefly before dropping back down, "See you tomorrow." He smiled widely and she turned around with an accomplished smile, starting to head down the main path again.

He watched her walk away for a moment before heading into his house, his mom jumping up from the living room the moment she heard him swing the door open.

"So?" She questioned loudly.

"So?" He teased with a smirk.

Rolling her eyes, she clarified, "How did the test go?"

"Okay." He repeated his answer again, "Most of it was fine but there were some parts that tripped me up."

"If you were fine with most of it I'm sure you did well." She rubbed his shoulder.

"We'll just have to wait and see." Sora answered before walking into the living room and sprawling across the loveseat, "For now, I just wanna relax."

She smiled, walking into the living room as well, "I'm sure."

After a lazy and uneventful night, Sora went to sleep early just as he said and fell asleep effortlessly. When he heard Kairi's voice the next morning, he was sure he still had to be deep in a dream despite the fact he saw the sunlight shining through his room.

"Sora." He heard again. Blinking, he turned over slowly and stared at the red haired girl sitting on the floor next to his bed, her head resting on the edge of his mattress.

"Am I dreaming or did I sleep in late?" He asked quietly, still feeling groggy.

"Neither." She stood up and gave him a light push, "Scoot over."

Though he was still confused, he obliged and she slipped under the covers beside him. "Isn't my mom home?" He didn't have enough energy to fight with her but he was beginning to wonder if she lost her mind.

"Nope." She turned over towards him, snuggling against his chest and closing her eyes, "She got called into work."

Vaguely remembering hearing the phone ring early that morning, he let out, "Oh." Draping an arm over her middle, he commented, "But that still doesn't explain why you're over here so early. And how you know that." He let out a small laugh, "Are you spying on me?"

Her eyes opened and she gave him a small glare, "No." She turned over onto her back and Sora began to pull his arm back until she held it in place, answering, "I came over because I wanted to and I caught your mom right as she was leaving."

"A likely story." Sora teased, giving her a doubting look.

She began to sit up, "I mean, I can go home and come back later if you want me to."

He used his arm to gently push her back down, "You can stay."

"Good." She smiled mischievously, reaching up and pulling him down to her by the collar of his shirt. Though he was a bit surprised at first, his lips curled upward into a smile as he swooped down to catch hers.

Now Kairi was the one who was surprised. Blinking, she tried her best to match his eagerness; her hands reaching up to lightly grasp the sides of his face. From there, she took control again and Sora had no problem with that, his hands now gripping her hip and shoulder. She slowed the tempo down before picking it back up again and then repeating the process.

Sora eventually broke away for a moment to ask, "What are you doing?"

"Distracting you." She answered before kissing him again.

He pushed her shoulders to pull away again, "What?"

"You'll see." She struggled against him to lean back in for another kiss. Sora eventually gave in with a sigh, letting her kiss him again. She wrapped her arms around his neck and moved them down his back soothingly in an effort to reassure him that everything was alright.

Just as Sora was considering questioning her again, he heard on a knock on his bedroom door as well as someone clearing their throat. Kairi moved out of his grasp swiftly, getting up from his bed before turning around and urging, "C'mon." Sora's lips were parted and he was staring at her like she had two heads. Groaning, she reached down and tugged on his arm, repeating, "Come on! It's just Riku."

Still thoroughly confused, he let her pull him out of bed and lead him over to the door. Just as soon as she got the door open, Riku shoved something into his arms and said, "Put this on."

"What the—" He started as he looked down before realizing what it was; a graduation gown and cap. Gaping, he looked back up at Riku, "So does this mean what I think it means?"

Riku smiled, "Hurry up."

He took a step back and froze, "Wait, do I need to put dress clothes on and stuff?"

"You can literally put it over your pajamas if you want." The older boy shrugged.

"Okay." He shrugged as well, putting the cap on a shelf next to his door while he slipped on the gown. Zipping it up and still feeling like he was drowning in a sea of fabric, he commented, "It's kind of big."

"It was mine." Riku scratched the back of his neck.

Sora laughed, "Thank you." After struggling to put the cap over the spiky hair and leaving it sort of lopsided, he asked, "Good enough?"

Kairi and Riku both laughed and nodded before gently guiding him down the stairs and then to the back patio, where his mom was waiting with what he assumed was a case with his diploma. "So you're the one that put them up to this." He grinned. She nodded and laughed, reaching up to where tears where beginning to gather at the corner of her eyes. "Aw, c'mon. Don't cry." He hurried over, wrapping one of his arms around her.

"I'm just proud of you." She hugged him tightly.

"Thanks." He squeezed her tighter as well.

Reaching into her purse, Kairi pulled out a camera and announced, "Picture time!"

Sora's mom handed him his diploma and he flipped it open to peek inside, smiling in admiration at his printed name. Seeing a bright flash, he quickly closed it and looked up, complaining, "Hey, I wasn't ready yet!" Kairi waved him off so he put his arm back over his mom's shoulder, grinning widely as they posed for the picture.

After the flash, his mom took a step forward and said, "Let me get a picture of you three together."

Kairi used her free hand to push Riku forward while handing the camera to Sora's mom. Both standing on either side of Sora, Sora put one arm over Riku's shoulder and the other around Kairi's waist while they held his diploma in front of him.


	10. A Balancing Act

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Nine: A Balancing Act

"Glad you're finally pulling your weight around here." Wakka called from the other side of the room, "You were pretty hopeless when you were new."

Sora finished putting the insulation into the wall before turning his head, careful not to shift his weight too much on the ladder, "Insulation's probably the easiest thing ever. It's just shoving stuff into walls."

"But you just helped me put in that ceiling." He pointed upward, "_That_ wasn't easy."

Sora moved downward, pushing his ladder a few feet before grabbing another piece of insulation from the pile they had made and climbing back up. Starting the next row, he admitted, "Yeah, I guess."

"You've learned a lot even if it doesn't feel like it." Wakka continued to put in the insulation on his side of the room, "Speaking of learning, are you going to apply to get into the university now that you've got your diploma?"

"Yeah. But I'm not gonna worry about it till it gets a little colder and work slows down. Which should be soon, at this rate." Sora shuddered over dramatically before continuing his work.

Wakka laughed loudly, "It's not that bad yet." He finished up his last piece before climbing down.

"It's cold enough that I have to bring a jacket every day. That's bad enough for me." The younger boy finished up and climbed back down the ladder as well, asking, "So what next?"

"We're actually at a pretty good stopping point for the day. We don't really have enough time to get a good start on the walls so I think we should just leave it as it is." He started putting away some of the miscellaneous tools that were laying around on the floor.

Sora's eyes widened excitedly, "Really? We get to go home early?"

"Sure." He continued to pick things up, "As soon as we clean up, you're free to go."

"Alright!" Sora grinned before hurriedly starting to pick up whatever Wakka hadn't gotten to yet. Once the two had collected everything and locked it up for the night, he was on his way out the door, "See you tomorrow, Wakka!"

Giving a brief wave, he repeated, "See ya!"

Once he was officially off the job site, he picked up the pace quite a bit. He was so ready to take a shower and to change into fresh clothes. Most of all, to see Kairi. Midterms had claimed both her and Riku for the past two weeks and he was only just getting opportunities to hang out with them again. He initially offered to help them study since they had done the same for him, but other than flipping flash cards, he wasn't much help.

He was so wrapped up in his own excitement that he nearly forgot to check the mail on his way in. Already halfway up his porch, he muttered, "Oops." to himself before heading back down to the mailbox. Pulling out two bills for the electric and water, he noticed a small envelope underneath. Plucking it out and laying it on top, he saw King Mickey's seal on the back and his heart dropped down into his stomach.

Without opening it, he already knew what it was. King Mickey or Yen Sid wouldn't waste magic to send a letter just to check in on him, even if they may have wanted to. So that left just one possibility.

He was going to have to leave home again. Just as he was _finally_ beginning to settle in.

His throat tight, he laid the two bills down in the mailbox as he started to open the King's letter. He skimmed the details of the letter, eventually coming the information he needed: two days. He had two days before he had to leave and the trip itself would probably take two days as well.

With that, he grabbed the rest of the mail and rushed into the house. Dropping off the other mail on the table by the front door, he went upstairs and dropped the letter on the desk in his room. He normally took the effort to specifically pick out clothes to wear around Kairi, but today, he grabbed whatever the first things were at the top of his dresser. He needed to see her as soon as possible and that was more important than whatever clothes he was wearing.

But once he was in the shower, he had no choice but to slow down because his mind was racing with so many questions. How was Kairi going to react when he told her? Or Riku, or his mom? How was he going to tell Jecht he needed to leave so suddenly? Would he even be able to help people after he hadn't used the keyblade for so long?

Finishing up, he threw on his clothes and a jacket as quickly as possible and headed to Kairi's. He was nervous about her reaction but he couldn't handle waiting, either. He was sure he would drive himself crazy if he tried to hold it in any longer than he already was.

Kairi answered her door fairly quickly, but seemed very flustered when she opened the door. "Sora," She pushed the door a little more towards him, trying to hide the fact she was wearing sweatpants, "You're so early."

"I need to talk to you." He answered as softly as he could. He didn't want to scare her but he didn't want to lessen the seriousness of the situation, either.

"Um, okay." She pushed the door open and he walked into the living room, receiving a glare from Selphie that was harsher than usual.

'_Well, she already knows…'_ Sora avoided her eyes, looking off to the kitchen.

After Kairi had locked her front door, she walked past him and led him into her bedroom. Once they were both inside, Sora shut the door behind him. "What's wrong?" She asked immediately.

"I got…" He started, but faltered. Seeing Kairi's concerned stare, he looked down and finished, "I got a letter from King Mickey."

"O-Oh…" Kairi looked off into a corner of her room, unsure of what to say, "Well, we knew this was coming."

Sora looked back up at her, "But it doesn't make it any easier." He stepped forward and reached out, hugging her tightly, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay." She answered, but her voice squeaked. Hugging him back, she tried her best to fight the tears that were building at the corners of her eyes, "How long will you be gone?"

"Two days. Maybe three." He answered quietly.

Kairi took a breath before answering, "That's not very long. I'll be okay." She sounded like she was trying to convince herself rather than reassure him. With a sniffle, she asked the next question, "When are you leaving?"

Sora sighed against her hair, "The day after tomorrow."

With that, the tears started to fall from her eyes. "N-not much notice, huh?" She tried to make a joke, but her voice was shaky and her emotions were starting overwhelm her.

He hugged her even tighter, repeating , "I'm so sorry, Kairi." His voice was starting to shake, too, and his apology only made her start to cry harder. "I can't do anything this time, but I promise that I'll make sure that you and Riku can come with me later on. Just like I said before." His eyes watered as he finished, his voice barely above a whisper, "I hate that I keep doing this to you."

"I hate it too, but I know that you have to." She wiped her eyes with her sleeve, "It's not like I can just skip classes and work for two days just because I want to go with you." She took a step backward to lock eyes with him, "But you have to understand that I'm scared. The last time you left, I wasn't sure if I was ever going to see you again. And even though I don't want to feel this way, it's hard not to."

"I know." Sora swallowed painfully, his eyes flickering to the floor before looking back up at her, "I'll stay with you tonight and tomorrow as much as humanly possible but once I leave, you're just going to have to trust me." He reached out and cupped both sides of her face, kissing her tenderly before saying loudly, "I love you."

Another tear fell down her face, but she smiled, "I love you too." Gently moving his arms from around her, she sat down on her bed and looked up at him, "It's just hard. I'm gonna miss you. I missed you even just being too busy from these midterms, but I felt okay because I knew you were just down the street if I really needed you."

He kicked off his shoes and sat down next to her, answering, "It was the same for me. I was really excited that I was going to actually get to spend time with you today." Letting out a small laugh, he finished, "And then I found that letter when I got home."

"Well, we're still together right now." She touched his arm before scooting backwards and sprawling out across the bed, "Even if it's not under the best circumstances."

He turned his torso towards her but kept his feet in place, asking, "Are you tired?"

"Yeah." She admitted quietly, "I was gonna take a nap before we went to go see the sunset." She glanced out the window, where she could see the sky was already turning a light pink, "Which I guess it's too late for now."

He lifted his legs onto the bed and rolled over towards her, draping an arm around her as he said, "Go ahead and take one. I'll stay with you till you fall asleep and then I'll go get Riku as well as some dinner to bring back, okay? And we'll have a movie marathon or play board games all night. Whatever you wanna do."

She laughed a little, "That actually sounds really nice. I can't even remember the last time we did something like that."

Sora pulled her a little bit closer to him and grinned, "Then it's settled."

Kairi tilted her head upward to kiss him before resting against his chest. He rubbed her back soothingly and gave the occasional kiss on her forehead or cheek. She would giggle and peek open her eyes to look at him at first, but the sleepier she got she just gave small smiles.

When she hadn't talked or made noise in a while, he whispered, "Kairi?" Only hearing light breathing in response, he did his best to get off of her bed without disturbing her. Quietly putting his shoes back on, he slipped out into the hallway and gently pulled her door closed.

As he exited, he saw Selphie still seated on the couch in the living room. When he made eye contact, she immediately jumped up and started to move towards her room. "Selphie, I need to talk to you too." Sora blocked her path, his voice low and desperate.

"What for?" She snarled back at him loudly.

"Please try to be quiet, Kairi's sleeping." He pleaded, "Let's go outside."

Though she lowered her voice, she wasn't any friendlier, "I'm betting she cried herself to sleep."

"No, she didn't." Sora huffed in response, "She did cry at first, I won't lie about that. But just _please_ talk to me outside."

"Fine." The younger girl, stormed out and he followed after her. Once the front door was shut, she demanded loudly, "Talk."

"You had every right to treat me like you did when I first got home. I hated myself too, more than you'll ever know. But you've been hurting her feelings for these past few weeks even though your problems are with me, and it needs to stop." Sora motioned towards the apartment and stared her down.

She continued to glare and clenched her fists, opening her mouth to retaliate but quickly decided otherwise. Looking off to the side, she gave an annoyed sigh, not able to argue back.

His expression softened, "You don't have to like me and we don't have to pretend like everything's fine between us. But for Kairi's sake, just be civil with me, okay?"

Letting out another sigh, she answered, "I guess I can do that; for her." Crossing her arms, she asked in annoyed tone, "But you're leaving again, right?"

"For two days. And I wanted to talk to you about that, too." He placed his hands in his pockets, beginning to feel the coldness in the air.

She raised an eyebrow, "What for?"

"I want to surprise Kairi." He answered with a small smile, "So Friday afternoon, before she gets back from class, I was hoping you would be there to let me in so I can wait in the living room until she gets home."

Selphie considered the thought for a moment, seeming unsure. But eventually she gave in, "I'll be there."

"Thank you." Sora smiled widely. Pausing for a moment, he asked awkwardly, "Oh. So, um. I was gonna go get Riku and come back with something to eat. I was probably going to go to Kairi's favorite take-out place; do you want anything?"

She blinked a few times, surprised by his offer. Regaining her composure, she began to walk back towards the front door as she answered, "Curry Chicken." With that, she disappeared back inside.

"Uh… Alright." Sora said to himself with a bit of a laugh. He had expected Selphie to fight tooth and nail against him, but the moment he brought up that she had hurt Kairi, she gave up fairly easily. The situation still wasn't perfect by any means, but it was definitely a start and for that he was glad.

Starting down the main road, he realized he was going to have to call his Mom as well as leave a voicemail for Jecht when he got back to Kairi's apartment. He would tell his mom the news later tonight in person, as it wasn't really something that could be said over the phone, but he wanted her to know he was staying out late. He didn't technically need to call, but he knew it made her feel better.

Sora didn't even have to turn down the path to Riku's house, as he spotted him a little ways down the main road. Picking up the pace, he yelled out, "Hey, you're out late!"

Riku looked a bit surprised but gave a small smile when he saw Sora. "I was tutoring today. I figured if I could put up with you, I could put up with anybody." He answered loudly, "And this time, I got paid!"

"Ha ha, very funny." The brunette responded sarcastically as he got closer.

"So what are you going into town for?" Riku asked as he adjusted his backpack to make his shoulders more comfortable.

"To get dinner for me, Kairi, Selphie and potentially you." His face turned serious as he took a step past Riku, "There's something I've gotta talk to you about."

The older boy hummed in interest, responding, "Well, you said you're getting food for Selphie so is everything with her all patched up?"

"More like… temporarily patched up." He answered honestly, starting to walk, "So are you coming with me?"

Riku started to walk as well, answering, "Doesn't seem like you're giving me much of a choice. What do you mean temporarily patched up?"

He glanced back to the older boy momentarily before explaining, "I got her to agree to be civil with me for Kairi. She still doesn't really like me, but whatever. That's good enough for me."

"So how'd you get her to finally talk to you?" Riku questioned curiously.

"I didn't really give her a choice. But she was kinda freshly angry because of what was going on so that made it easier." Sora started to explain, his voice lowering as he continued, "I got a letter from King Mickey today."

"Oh." He saw Riku lower his head, asking, "So Kairi's pretty upset, huh?"

Sora nodded, "Yeah. I cheered her up a bit earlier, but all this is so I can spend more time with her tonight. As well as you, if you can." He waved his hand towards his friend.

He nodded as well, "Yeah, I can stay over for a while."

"Thanks." The brunette gave a small smile, "I'm starting to feel a little bit better about it, the more the day goes on. I was absolutely devastated when I first saw the letter but I guess there's some positives. I get to see everybody at Disney Castle for a little while and hopefully whatever world we need to go to will be one I've been to before so I can check in on some other friends. Plus I got Selphie to agree to help me surprise Kairi when I get back, so I'm pretty happy about that too."

"Figured it wouldn't take you long to become a sappy romantic." Riku teased with a smirk.

Sora rolled his eyes, "She deserves it with what I put her through." Standing up as tall as he could, he reached over to pat Riku's head, saying mockingly, "Someday you'll understand."

"Pfft." He pushed Sora's hand away, laughing, "Right."

"I didn't really have a choice about finding out what Kairi had been doing relationship wise for the past few years, but I haven't asked you yet." The younger boy crossed his arms and looked at him expectantly, "So?"

Riku looked off sheepishly, "I've just been a few dates here and there. Nothing serious."

Sora yawned mockingly, putting a hand up to his mouth, "How boring. Girls have been drooling over you ever since middle school so I expected more of you."

"Like you can say anything. I'm pretty sure most people would definitely say you're the more boring one." The older boy glanced over to him.

"Touché." He smiled, "But I wouldn't change anything."

"Good. Cuz if you said otherwise, I would probably would have kicked your ass." He put his hands on his sides.

Sora grinned and nodded, "Understandable."

Riku suddenly stopped and Sora gave him a look before he said, "Isn't the place?"

The brunette looked upward and read the sign before rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, "Yeah, it is."

The two walked through the door and Riku took a seat off to the side while Sora went up to the counter and put in the order. Walking back to the table, he commented loudly, "I guess we should have called from your house so that way it would have already been ready when we got here." He sat down at the table.

Riku shrugged, "It'll be fresher by the time we get it back to Kairi and Selphie, though."

"I guess so." The younger boy stared out the window, "I can't believe I'm leaving home again already. Everything was starting to feel normal."

"Things haven't been normal for the three of us in a while and I don't think it ever will be." Riku gave a small smile, "But that doesn't have to be a bad thing."

Sora smiled back briefly before continuing, "It's just gonna take a while to get used to this back and forth stuff. It was always one or the other before, but now I have to do some sort of crazy balancing act." He propped his elbow on the table and rested his head against his open palm, "And I can't help but wonder how long am I gonna have to do this? Like, am I gonna be married and have kids and still be going off to other worlds randomly on top of trying to have a job?"

"It's hard to say… I would hope the worlds would be completely at peace by then. Either way, there's always the possibility that we may just have to pass the responsibility on to someone younger." Sora quickly turned towards Riku, a look of disbelief on his face. The older boy frowned, "I know you don't want to do it, but you can't do this forever. You just said it yourself."

"I know." He put his hands over his face, sighing. Then hearing the number of their order, he dropped his hands back to his side and smiled as he got up, "Anyway, let's drop talking about the heavy stuff for a while. I just wanna enjoy being with you guys."

He nodded in response, getting up as well, "Agreed."

Grabbing all the bags of food, the two boys made their way back to Kairi's apartment. Selphie opened the door, a lot more chipper due to the fact Riku was around. "Hi, come in!" She greeted, pulling the door open, adding, "Thanks for getting me food, by the way."

Sora gave a small smile, "You're welcome." Looking around the living room and kitchen with no sign of his girlfriend, he asked, "Is Kairi not up yet?"

Selphie shook her head before leading Riku over to the couch and directing him to put the bags of food on the living room table. Sora followed suite, placing the bags he had there before quietly making his way over to Kairi's room.

Pulling open the door slowly and closing the door after he had gotten into the room, he called out softly, "Kairi?" She turned over and smiled at him. "So you are up." He grinned, sitting on the edge of her bed.

"Only for a couple minutes." She sat up and moved closer to him, "I thought I heard you."

"So how come you didn't get up, then?" He questioned with a raised eyebrow.

She smiled, playfully wrapping her arms around his neck, "Maybe I wanted you to come wake me up."

"Your food's gonna get cold if you spend too much time teasing me." He leaned in towards her, staying just a few inches away from her face.

"It can wait for a minute or two." She closed the distance between them.


	11. The Passage of Time

**Author's note**: I had a lot of fun writing the Disney characters. They had always made me nervous before, but I think working at Walt Disney World helped me get down their characterizations quite a bit better. Hope you enjoy!

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Ten: The Passage of Time

Between his mom and Kairi's goodbyes, Sora was a mess as he was taking off from the islands. If it weren't for Riku, he wasn't even sure he would have had the heart to get on the gummi ship in the first place. But it was getting a little easier to think the farther away he got, as he moved out into open space.

It was only two days. Two days was _nothing_; not after being away for three years. It was gonna fly by just like every day had ever since he'd returned home. And he couldn't wait to see Kairi's reaction when she found him waiting in her living room, just the thought made him grin from ear to ear. That was enough to keep him going for now.

He was still feeling a little down as he reached Disney Castle, but he instantly smiled as he stepped off the gummi ship and heard Dale's voice. "Sora!" He didn't even see him or Chip before he felt them jump onto his shoulders, hugging his spiky hair. "It's nice to see ya!" Chip greeted excitedly.

"It's nice to see you guys too." He turned his head from side to side to look at them, "Did I keep the King waiting long?"

"Nah, you're just in time!" Chip hopped off his shoulders, rushing down the hallway.

Dale jumped down to follow after his brother, turning back to Sora and waving, "Follow us!"

The brunette followed them at a brisk pace, giving a small laugh, "Thanks." Truthfully, he still hadn't figured his way around the castle yet, despite the amount of times he'd been there. He would recognize the hallway that led into the throne room, but he was completely clueless as to how to make it to that point from the gummi hangar.

Pushing open the door to the throne room, he wasn't given much time to react before Donald and Goofy had him in tight bear hugs, both yelling out his name, "Sora!"

"Hi, guys." He hugged them back just as tightly. Looking up over Goofy's head, he spotted King Mickey and Queen Minnie. Giving a small wave and bowing to the best of his ability, he greeted, "Your majesties."

As Donald and Goofy pulled away from Sora, King Mickey began to apologize, "I'm sorry we had to bring you back so soon, Sora, but it was an urgent matter."

"It's okay." The brunette shook his head, "How can I help?"

"We got word that there's some trouble happening in a world named Atlantica." Queen Minnie started to explain, "They're trying their best to handle the situation themselves, but we thought it'd be best to send them some extra help."

Sora blinked, taking in the information, "Atlantica, huh? Hope Ariel and Eric are okay."

"I'm sure they are. Plus they've got King Triton lookin' out for them, too." Goofy put a hand on his shoulder.

Sora turned his head, looking at him briefly and nodding, "Yeah, you're right."

"So how soon do we need to get going?" Donald took a step forward, waving one of his arms.

"As soon as Chip and Dale get the gummi ship ready, which shouldn't be too much longer, now." King Mickey answered, looking up as he estimated how much time had passed.

Sora glanced down to the floor, realizing that he didn't even notice Chip and Dale leave the room. "Wow, that was fast." He looked back up, "So is it _really _urgent?"

"We don't know much more than what Minnie was saying before, but we want to try and get you home as soon as possible too." He looked over to Queen Minnie who nodded, both smiling at Sora.

The brunette felt his eyes water a little bit, smiling gratefully as he bowed again, "Thank you." King Mickey may have essentially been his boss, but he was every bit as true a friend as Donald and Goofy.

"Aw, it's no problem, Sora. You're helping us out so much, the least we can do is help you back." King Mickey smiled sheepishly, a loud beep ringing out through the room shortly after he finished talking.

"Your majesty, the gummi ship is ready to go!" Chip's voice announced cheerfully.

"Thank you for your hard work, boys!" Queen Minnie answered.

Dale's voice responded this time, "Our pleasure!" After that, there was another beep to signify that they had turned off the intercom.

"Well, guess it's time to get going." Goofy waved his arms towards Donald and Sora.

King Mickey nodded and waved goodbye, "Do your best. I'll see ya tomorrow." Queen Minnie waved as well, smiling sweetly.

"Goodbye, your majesties." Donald answered with a bow, Goofy and Sora following his lead before making their way back to the gummi ship hangar.

After the three of them had said their goodbyes to Chip and Dale and prepared the gummi ship for departure, Goofy asked, "So, Sora. How've you been doing back home?"

"It was… pretty awkward at first." He answered truthfully, a small smile on his lips.

"Weren't Riku and Kairi happy to see you?" Donald asked from Sora's side.

He turned his head to hide his growing smile, but lowered his voice as if he were upset, "Well, Riku was… Not so much for Kairi."

He heard Donald and Goofy shuffle awkwardly, unsure of what to say. "Aw, Sora. We're sorry…" Goofy finally managed to say, holding his arm out but unsure of whether or not to touch the brunette's shoulder.

He turned back around, "It's okay. Everything's fine now." Sora couldn't hold back his grin any longer, "We're actually dating now."

Goofy was immediately happy for him, "Congratulations!"

Donald was a different story. "Don't worry us like that!" The duck used his staff to hit Sora's side, to which he let out a small yelp before laughing.

"Sorry." He apologized with another laugh, continuing softly as he sat down and put on the seat belt, "But I wasn't lying. It was really complicated when I first got home. But once we got past that, everything's been great. I have a part time job helping out my friend's dad's construction company, so like helping build houses and stuff. And my high school let me take a big exam for my diploma and I passed. With lots of help from Riku and Kairi, of course." He leaned back and turned his head to look at where they were now seated behind him.

They both let out exclamations of "Way to go!" and "Good job!".

He smiled gratefully, continuing, "Thanks. I think that about sums it up for most of the important stuff. What about you guys? What have you been up to?"

"Helping to keep Disney Town and the castle in order, like we used to do when the worlds were still separate." Donald answered, smiling a bit as he admitted, "But compared to the adventures we've been on together, it's kind of boring."

Goofy let out a chuckle as Sora answered, "Yeah, everything is a bit more boring now. But sometimes boring is nice." His friends nodded in agreement. "So, ready to go?"

"You bet." Donald quacked in response.

"Ready!" Goofy answered cheerfully.

Initiating the controls for take-off, Sora announced, "Here we go!"

The trip to Atlantica was pretty quick, but Donald had never gotten over the habit of backseat driving and Sora's head was spinning by the time he had landed. Stepping out of the ship, he let out a sigh of relief before he paused. They were on solid ground instead of surrounded by water.

Scrunching his eyebrows, he looked around and asked, "Wait… We're in Atlantica, right? Why aren't we in the ocean?"

"Beats me." Donald shrugged and Goofy seemed clueless as well.

"Guess there's only one way to find out…" He started walking forward, raising his hand to point, "That castle over there is probably where Prince Eric lives. I'm sure he'll let us know what's going on."

As they walked through the small town, they received quite a few stares and whispers, reminding him of the people back on his home world. Though it made him feel a bit uncomfortable, it was a good sign. If the town was had been preyed on by heartless, they more than likely would have been happy to see them. He looked to his friends, giving them an encouraging smile since they seemed a bit uncomfortable too.

"Are you Sora, Donald, and Goofy?" He heard a man's voice from his side and quickly turned around.

Seeing an older man of short stature and dressed in seemingly nice clothes, Sora greeted, "Yep, that's us!"

"The King and Queen have been waiting for you. Follow me." He waved them forward before starting on his way.

"The King and Queen?" Sora mumbled to his friends in confusion.

Goofy suggested quietly, "Maybe Prince Eric suggested us?"

The brunette hummed to himself in thought, remaining silent the rest of the way to the castle. Once they were through the gates, they were immediately greeted by a familiar voice.

"Sora! Donald! Goofy!" Ariel came rushing towards them, "It's so good to see you!"

"Ariel, you—" Sora stuttered, "Y-you're not a mer—"

She smiled and shook her head, "No. I made the decision to be with Eric." She held up her hand, showing them her wedding ring.

"Congratulations!" Sora, Donald, and Goofy all said within a few seconds of each other, causing her to laugh.

"Thank you." She smiled widely.

He paused, acknowledging, '_So _she's_ the Queen now. That makes more sense.'_

"So what was it that you needed our help with?" Donald asked curiously.

Ariel's face fell, turning away slightly as she spoke, "It's Ursula's sister, Morgana. We sailed out to sea to introduce Daddy to Melody and she showed up, threatening to hurt Melody in revenge for Ursula." She turned back to them, "It's pretty well known that Morgana's magic is nowhere near as strong as Ursula's and the ocean is pretty well guarded by my father's men but… I wanted to have you three here, just in case she tries something on land. These soldiers aren't prepared for anything like that."

Donald and Goofy nodded understandingly, but Sora had to ask, "Um… Melody?"

"Our daughter." Ariel smiled widely again, waving towards the castle as she asked, "Do you want to meet her?"

"Gawrsh, we'd love to!" Goofy replied excitedly, practically bouncing up and down. Sora and Donald smiled and nodded, following Ariel up the steps once she had begun to move forward.

Passing through a few hallways and doors, they finally reached a room where Eric was waiting, holding what Sora assumed to be a baby wrapped in blankets in his arms. "Hey, you three. It's nice to see you." He greeted cheerfully.

"Nice to see you, too." Sora answered with a smile, watching Ariel encouraging Eric to step forward with a gentle nudge of his arm.

Once he had, he lowered himself a bit so the trio could see the baby better. "This is Melody." Ariel introduced in a sweet voice. "Melody, this is Sora, Donald and Goofy. They're great friends of mine."

Sora peered down at the baby curiously, smiling as he said, "She looks just like you, Ariel. Except for her hair."

"Yep, that's all me." Eric answered proudly.

Goofy was practically beside himself, "Can I hold her?"

"Of course." Eric passed Melody to Goofy gently, Melody not seeming to mind a bit. In fact, she was probably the happiest baby Sora had ever seen; she seemed like she was nothing but smiles.

"Aw, I miss when Maxie was this little." Goofy grinned down at her before looking up to Ariel and Eric, "They grow up so fast."

"Believe me, we know. She's only a few months old, but she's already grown so much." Ariel gushed before turning to Sora, "Would you like to hold her?"

"S-sure." He answered, a little bit nervous as held out his arms. As Goofy laid her down in Sora's arms, Ariel helped to shift him ever so slightly so that he could support her better.

Letting go, she beamed, "There you go!" He smiled back and looked down at Melody, who was now attempting to blow bubbles with her mouth and laughing at the noises she was making in the process. Ariel leaned slightly over his shoulder, commenting, "She likes you." Sora glanced upward momentarily, his grin growing.

"Can I hold her too?" Donald waved his hand to catch their attention. Ariel nodded, reaching out to support Melody again as Sora kneeled down carefully to Donald. "Awww." He cooed as he held her, "She's so cute!" A few moments later, Melody was squirming and making small whines, which Donald seem very nervous.

"Don't worry, she's probably just getting hungry." Ariel reached to take Melody back, rocking her in her arms as she suggested, "Eric, could you show them where they're staying tonight?"

He nodded, "Yes, of course. Follow me." He began to walk forward, motioning them with one of his arms.

"See ya later, Ariel." Sora waved, starting to walk.

"And Melody, too!" Goofy chimed in and Sora nodded with a small laugh. Ariel let out a small giggle and waved as well before walking out of sight.

Following Eric through another short hallway, he pointed towards two doors, "We've got 2 different rooms you can use, each one has two beds. And the bathroom will be the door at the end of the hallway on the right." The trio smiled appreciatively and Eric started to take a step away, "I'll go ahead and let you guys get settled in. Don't be afraid to ask if you need help finding anything."

"Thank you!" They all replied at once.

Eric laughed, beginning to walk, "Meet me downstairs in the main hall when you're ready."

Opening one door, they poked their heads in before taking a few steps into the room. "Wow!" Donald's mouth practically dropped. The floor was the same white marble that filled the rest of the castle and a few paintings adorned the wall, hanging parallel to the two full sized beds. In the back of the room there was a small white couch that sat just in front of a large window that filled the room with natural light.

Walking over to the window, Sora leaned over the couch and pushed the sheer curtain out of the way, revealing a breath taking view of the ocean below. "Guys, look at this!" He waved them over.

"So pretty!" Goofy commented excitedly.

"This place is great!" Donald echoed from atop the couch.

Sora turned around, "So should we go look at the other room?"

"You bet." Donald jumped down, walking past Sora eagerly and exiting the room. When Sora and Goofy caught up with him and walked into the other room, Sora noted that the second room was a little bit bigger but overall very similar in terms of design and comfort.

"You guys can have this one. I'll take the smaller one." Sora nodded towards the door, signifying he was about to go back.

Goofy titled his head, "You sure?"

"Yeah, it's fine. Just give me a couple minutes and we can head back downstairs." He gave a small wave before heading towards the door.

"Okay!" Donald answered loudly from behind him.

Once he made it inside of his bedroom, he shut the door closed with a small click before walking over and letting himself fall backwards on to the bed. He expected to bounce a little bit, but the mattress was so soft that he practically sunk in. Folding his arms behind his head, he stared up at the ceiling.

'_I can't believe Ariel and Eric are married and have a baby now._ _I mean… it's probably been at least four years since I've seen them, so it shouldn't be too surprising.'_ He let out a small sigh, closing his eyes, '_Everyone's been moving forward while I've just been stuck in place. Wonder how long it'll take before I manage to catch up?'_

There was no doubt that he was making progress back at home, but he'd still missed so much and he was never going to get that time back. That was what bothered him the most. As for his friends on other worlds, he supposed he was going to have to get used to feeling like he'd missed out on a lot. The more time he spent at home was less time that he spent out on other worlds and vice versa.

He let out a small laugh to himself, '_It's funny. Time was probably the last thing on my mind just a few years ago. Now I can't stop thinking about it._' He flopped over onto his stomach, '_Maybe once I get used to "boring" life back at home again, time will go slower. Like what Donald was talking about_.'

He hoped so.

Pushing himself back off the bed, he stood up and moved to the window. Sliding it open, he closed his eyes and inhaled, listening to the sounds of the ocean and the seagulls flying above as he remembered the words Riku said in the realm of darkness, '_At least the waves sound the same_.'

"Sora? You ready?" He heard Goofy knock on his door.

Blinking his eyes open and inhaling, he slid the window shut again, "Yeah, just a sec."


	12. Past to Present

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Eleven: Past to Present

Sora stared out through the windshield and into space, thinking out loud, "I can't believe they didn't find her…"

"Hopefully she just gave up." Goofy suggested in a positive tone, Sora turning his head slightly to look at him as he spoke.

"Yeah. They said she was a lot weaker than Ursula, right? Maybe she realized she was no match against all of us." Donald chimed in as well.

The brunette focused on everything in front of him again, "I hope so. But I know Ariel, Eric, and King Triton aren't going to stop worrying until they find her. So I hope something turns up soon."

"Me too." Goofy nodded his head.

"We can always go back if we need to." Donald answered automatically before hesitating, "Uh… I mean. It's not the best option, but me and Goofy could always go with King Mickey…"

Sora let out a breath, trying not to let himself get too sad about the situation. It'd only been a day and he was already back in the mindset of traveling with Donald and Goofy. But on the other hand, seeing Kairi was the first thing on his mind when he woke up that morning.

Getting used to this was going to be hard.

Eventually, he replied, "It's nice to have stuff planned ahead most of the time… but if it's an emergency, I'll make it work."

"Okay." Donald sounded a little sad too, but Sora could tell he was trying his best to stay positive.

The rest of the way to Disney Castle was a little awkward, none of them really knowing what could be said to really make the situation better. And the mood didn't really improve after making it to the castle and reporting to King Mickey and Queen Minnie that Morgana had yet to be found and that the mission essentially was hanging in the air.

Donald and Goofy followed him back out to the gummi ship hangar, lingering a few feet away from the door and both looking pretty glum. "Don't worry, I'll see you guys again soon." Sora smiled widely, trying to cheer them up.

"Aw, we know. We'll just miss ya, that's all." Goofy rubbed the back of his head sheepishly.

Sora reached out to hug Goofy first, then moved on to Donald, "I'll miss you too."

"Good luck with surprising Kairi when you get home." Donald said as Sora pulled back.

"Thanks." He smiled, standing back up, "Speaking of, I guess I need to get going if I want to beat her back from school." He gave a small wave, "Bye."

They both waved back, "Bye, Sora."

After a gummi ship ride that seemed to take forever, he literally sprinted to Kairi's apartment. Selphie was waiting outside, looking very unhappy as he came into view. "I was starting to think you were gonna be late." She looked down on him as he bent over, supporting himself on his knees as he tried to catch his breath.

"Sorry," He let out a loud breath, continuing in fragments, "Tried… my best."

Her face softened a little bit, but she still looked skeptical as she asked, "So you're going to surprise her looking like that?"

"I'll be okay in a minute." He stood up a little straighter, still giving a few heavy breaths before reaching to the backpack over his shoulders, "I have clean clothes in here."

Selphie gave a nod of approval, "Alright." She motioned toward the door, "I left it unlocked. I'm gonna go out for a bit so you two can be alone."

"Thank you so much for doing this, Selphie." He smiled excitedly, "I owe you so much."

"That you do." She nodded again before waving him away, "Go clean yourself up! She'll be here pretty soon."

He headed for the door, saying "Thank you!" one more time. Once inside, he twisted the lock on the door before heading into the bathroom and setting his backpack on the floor. After changing into new clothes, reapplying deodorant, and a few splashes of water on his face, he felt good as new.

Zipping his backpack, he walked back out to the living room and took a seat on the couch. He wondered for a moment if he should just stand, but he would have plenty of time to stand up before Kairi managed to get the door open. But his nerves also made it nearly impossible to stay still, either. Any time he so much as heard a bird, he almost jumped out of his seat. And the one time he was _sure_ it was Kairi, it was actually her next door neighbor.

Finally he heard the key turning in the door and then there was no doubt. Shooting upward, his heart started to race as he waited for her, staying just out of sight.

As the door creaked open, she called out, "Selphie, you home?"

Sora smiled to himself, biting his lip as he tried to stay quiet.

Hearing no response, she closed the door and took a few more steps into the apartment, her backpack draped loosely over one arm. After she had passed through the small hallway and caught sight of him, her mouth immediately fell open, "_Sora!_" She dropped her backpack to the floor with a loud thud, her arms wrapped around him tightly before he even had the chance to respond.

"Hey," He spoke against her hair, hugging her back just as tightly.

She tilted backwards, asking breathlessly, "I thought you wouldn't be back until late tonight or tomorrow morning at the earliest?"

Sora looked away, a small smirk on his lips as he admitted, "I may have exaggerated a little…"

"That was sneaky." He heard her answer in a loud and teasing voice before he felt her lips on his cheek, "But thank you."

His eyes moved back to her and he dipped his head, kissing her eagerly. Kairi smiled against his lips, kissing him back with just as much energy as she moved her hands up his back to pull him even closer. He deepened the kiss in response, his hands wandering downward until they stopped at her hips. Pulling away and shifting his hands a little to loosen his grasp, he asked, "Did you want to go see the sunset? If we head out now, we could still make it."

Kairi nodded, pulling her arms a little more towards herself. With a breath of air, she answered, "Sure."

Sora slipped out of her grasp before intertwining their fingers together and pulling her out the door, leaving her backpack right where she dropped it. "So what did you do while you were gone?" She pressed her arm against his as she looked up at him.

"Surprisingly, not much…" He used his freehand to rub the back of his neck, "We went to Atlantica and there was a bit of trouble going on but, there wasn't much we could do about it because we were on land."

She squinted her eyes, "On land?"

"Yeah," Sora nodded, "Ariel decided to become a human permanently and got married to Prince Eric."

Kairi looked away, humming in thought before responding, "That must have been a hard decision to make."

He shrugged, "She seems really happy, though. Well, aside from the stuff going on with Ursula's sister."

"You still need to explain that part." She reminded him with a small laugh.

"Right." Sora smiled sheepishly before continuing, "Well, uh. Ariel and Eric actually have a daughter now, named Melody. And they were going out to sea so King Triton could meet her for the first time and I guess Morgana crashed the party. Because of what happened to Ursula, she was threatening to hurt Melody."

Kairi's face fell, "That's terrible! She's just a baby and had absolutely nothing to do with it!"

"Yeah, it's terrible. Needless to say Ariel, Eric, and King Triton are all terrified for her. King Triton's got almost all of his soldiers searching the ocean for her but they haven't been able to find her yet so they called us in to help protect everyone on land. But they still haven't found anything, unfortunately."

She sighed and lowered her shoulders, "Wow, I can't imagine how worried they are."

"I know. I hated leaving there this morning, but there wasn't a whole lot more we could do." He sighed as well, "It really sucks. Melody was like, literally the happiest baby I've ever seen. Ariel and Eric should be able to enjoy their time with her, you know? I'm sure it's already hard enough just being a parent without having to worry about sea witches."

Kairi smiled, swinging their arms a little and agreeing, "Yeah." She gave a little pause before continuing, "So… was it kind of weird to find out Ariel was married and had a daughter?"

He gave a little nod, "I always want to believe that not that much time has passed. Especially because it started to seem like I was at least somewhat catching up here. It's just…" He lowered his head, "I know I lost three years. I know it, but I still can't really believe it. Because for me, everything just sort of stayed the same while everyone else was moving on."

She blinked, carefully considering what to say to him as she gripped his hand tighter. "You didn't lose those three years, you just weren't here on the islands. And yeah, maybe you missed out on some school." She paused again, lowering her voice for a moment, "Maybe a few other things… but you were changing people's lives. Directly or indirectly. I know you probably didn't really think about while you were out there actually doing it, because I didn't either. But it'll hit you how much you really changed their lives when you really sit down and think about it. I don't think you've really got the chance yet because you've been so busy trying to get everything back in order."

They stopped walking just shy of the dock, Kairi letting go of his hand so she could stand in front of him and lock her eyes with his, "But I think you'll even start to see it when you revisit worlds you haven't been to for a while. Even Atlantica. Think about it, if you hadn't helped Ariel then she might not be where she is today, with Eric. With Melody."

Sora lifted his head slowly, taking in her words and letting them wash over him. But he didn't have a response. Not yet.

So Kairi continued, "I know there's not really a way to make you feel better about the things you missed here and I'm sorry for that. But you've already got your high school degree and soon enough, you can go take classes at the university if you want to. As for missing out on things with me and with Riku, those three years will be so insignificant soon. You're home now and you're going to be here for _so_ much more than what you missed."

He kept staring at her for a moment, his mind clearly still spinning. When he finally managed to get his thoughts at least somewhat organized, he immediately collected her into his arms and kissed her before resting his chin atop her shoulder. "Thank you." He said softly before giving a bit of a laugh, "I'm sure you and Riku are both getting tired of me bringing this stuff up all the time, though. I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize." She reached up to rub his shoulders soothingly before leaning towards his ear and teasing in a low voice, "You might make us late for watching the sunset, though."

Sora pulled away, walking over to his newly repaired boat and waved over it with a smile, "Wanna try it out?"

"I dunno, are we gonna get stranded on the island?" She grinned as she walked over.

"It's a possibility." He untied it from the dock, readying it for her.

She sat down in the boat, shrugging, "Oh well. Guess I'll just have to miss class tomorrow morning if we do."

He laughed, sitting down in the other end of the boat before pushing off shore with his hand. Shaking the water off and reaching for the paddle, he commented, "The ocean's starting to get pretty cold."

"It's definitely fall, now." She answered, "Halloween's coming up pretty soon. You know what that means."

"Ah, yeah. Riku's party." Sora started to row, "Do you have a costume?"

She shook her head, "No, me and Selphie are going to go shopping soon. She propped her elbows on her knees and held her face in her hands, amused as she asked, "Do you have any idea of what you're going to do?"

He shrugged, "Uh… I don't know. I guess I'll probably use the magic I would use for Halloween Town. I don't really have the time to go shopping. Plus it's free."

"Cheater." Kairi stuck her tongue out at him.

"I could do the same thing for you, you know." He looked up with a raised eyebrow.

She rolled her eyes, "Unlike you, I don't want to take the easy way out."

"Alright, your loss." He answered in a bit of a sing-song voice and Kairi shook her head. "So if we don't get stranded, are there any papers or other things I should know about so I can get you home at a reasonable hour?"

She grinned into her hands, "There's a few things that I could probably work on but… nothing's urgent. So I'm yours for as long as you want me."

"As much I'd love to have you to myself all night, I think I should probably let my mom know I'm back home before she goes to sleep." Sora looked over to her with a small smile.

"I understand." She gave a smile in return.

After a few more minutes of comfortable silence, they finally reached the play island. "Looks like we just made it." Sora commented as he docked the boat.

"Mhm." Kairi nodded before climbing up onto the dock, looking down to watch him as he finished up and scooting backwards once he reached up to grab the side of the dock. Moving to the front of the dock, she carefully dangled her legs over the edge as she waited for him.

He slid in beside her, his shoulder and leg pressing lightly against hers, though he kept his arms behind himself as he leaned back. "Feels good to be home." He closed his eyes, listening to the same sound of the waves that he searched for out on other worlds. But what really made it feel like home was the weight and warmth he could feel from Kairi at his side.

She titled her head, resting it against his shoulder, "It feels good to have you home."

He smiled, opening his eyes and looking over to her. Kairi, however kept staring out into the sunset; her lips curled upward into a smile as well. Looking back over the ocean, he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her closer. "Hey, Kairi?" He called in a soft voice.

"Yeah?" She tilted her head upwards to look at him, though he was still focused on the sunset.

"How'd you hold up after I left?" He looked over to her with a small laugh, "You and mom both were practically guilting me out of leaving."

She elbowed him teasingly, answering, "I was okay after a while. It was sort of hard to fall asleep but Selphie entertained me for a while. It's nice to have things with her back to normal." She smiled again, "Thanks for talking with her. I know things are still kind of awkward but… at least it's better."

"Yeah, I mean she helped me out with surprising you. Definitely a big step from where we were." He nodded.

Kairi blinked in surprise, "Really? I figured you just used your keyblade…"

"Unlike you and Riku, my first thought _isn't_ to break into people's houses." Sora answered seriously and she gave a pout. He lightly tickled her side with his fingers causing her to smile again before batting away his hand. "But anyway, I asked Selphie before I went out to get dinner the other night. After I told you about the letter." He rested his hand against her side again.

"Selphie just can't say no to romantic gestures." She giggled to herself.

Sora raised an eyebrow, searching for verification, "So it was romantic, then?"

"I thought so." She nodded, looking up at him to ask, "Why?"

"I guess it's just nice to know that I'm not completely clueless." He answered with a grin.

She reached up and cupped the side of his face, staring at him in admiration, "Whatever you are, stay that way." She leaned in to kiss him.


	13. Happiness

**This chapter took a little longer than usual cuz I got hung up on a few parts/ended up re-writing them but I'm happy with what it turned into. It's definitely a nice little break from all the problems going on in the story even though they're sorta hovering in the background.**

**Also I've really been craving Halloween so it was kinda nice to be able to write this haha. Thanks to my followers on tumblr who helped me out with my name debate, as well! **

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Twelve: Happiness

"_Sora._"

"Hmpf?" He turned around to Riku, a pretzel halfway sticking out of his mouth.

Riku looked down at him in annoyance, crossing his arms, "I asked you to come over and help set things up, not eat everything before people get here."

Swallowing first, Sora answered in a whine, "C'mon, it was one pretzel." He pointed to his teeth, which included his vampire fangs he said, "Besides, It's not like I can eat a whole lot with these."

Just as he had said to Kairi, he had used magic to borrow his Halloween Town attire. However, to tone it down a bit, he decided to forgo the mask as well as the gloves.

"I'm sure you'll make it work somehow." His friend continued to put other bowls of food out on the table. The doorbell echoed through the front hallway, prompting him to turn his head toward Sora, "Could you get that?"

"Sure." He spun around automatically but started to get nervous as he approached the door. There were still plenty of people on the island he hadn't talked to yet or hadn't even seen since he returned home so the party was bound to be an eventful as well as awkward.

'_Probably more awkward._' He thought to himself with a sigh. Some of Kairi's ex-boyfriends would probably be there and to be honest, he still didn't know who they were. Kairi didn't like to talk about it and he didn't want to pry, so he left it alone. Though from her explanation of how the relationships went, he figured it probably wouldn't be too hard to spot them if they saw him and Kairi together.

Opening the door to see Serah's older sister Lightning, he was a little relieved. Nonetheless, she was still an extremely intimidating person. He greeted her nervously, "Hi."

"Hi." Her eyes flickered to him for a second before walking through the door, her facial expression blank.

Sora started to say as he pointed down the hallway, "Riku's in the—" but Lightning walked past him, completely ignoring him as he finished, "…dining room."

"Seems like you're off to a great start." He heard Selphie's voice comment from outside.

"Tell me about it." He mumbled as he started to turn around. Selphie was standing in the doorway in a short dress themed like a sailor's uniform with a small hat atop her head. Catching sight of Kairi behind her, he started to feel his face grow warm as he looked over her costume. She was wearing a pink satin dress, somewhat reminiscent of a ballet tutu in the front but it had a longer chiffon skirt that wrapped around the sides of her legs. Last but not least, she had a small crystal tiara atop her head.

"Nice wings, by the way." He looked back to Selphie, trying his hardest to not stare at either of them.

He blinked, confused for a moment before he remembered, "Oh. Thanks." Nervously, he motioned to both of them, "You two look great."

Kairi smiled and her younger friend replied less than enthusiastically, "Thanks. Nice to see you, but I'm gonna go find Riku." She glanced back to wink at Kairi before heading in through the door.

As Kairi took a few steps towards him, Sora commented curiously, "So, you're taking the princess thing seriously now?"

"Just for tonight." She gave him a coy smile.

"Hmm. Okay." He ran his hand down her arm, leaning down to give her a peck on the lips.

She giggled, "The fangs are… different."

"Sorry." He smiled sheepishly, "I didn't really think about it."

Kairi shook her head, parting her lips to respond before they heard a loud group of people approaching that made them both turn their heads. As they came into the lighted area, she greeted, "Noctis, hi!"

"Hey, Kairi!" He greeted as well, appearing much more energetic and happy than the last time Sora had seen him in the coffee shop. They stopped a few feet away and Noctis introduced the rest of his group, "This is Prompto, Gladiolus, and Ignis."

"Nice to meet you." She gave a wide smile to all of them.

Sora gave a small wave, "Hey. I'm Sora."

Noctis laughed a bit, "Yeah, I kinda overheard the girls gossiping that one day. But nice to meet you officially." He shook his hand before heading in, "See you guys around!"

"Yeah." Sora nodded, stepping out of the way to let them through.

"Cool costume!" Prompto commented loudly to Sora as he passed.

He laughed, "Thanks." Looking back over to Kairi, he suggested, "We should probably go inside before we get stuck on door duty all night."

She nodded enthusiastically, "Definitely." He put his hand on her lower back as he guided her inside; shutting the door once she had made it a few feet down the hallway. When he turned around, she had her hand on her hip as she said, "I still can't believe you cheated with your costume."

"I did not!" He retorted loudly, laughing again as he walked towards her, "Magic is _not_ cheating."

She angled herself away from him, "Mhmm. Sure it's not." She started to walk towards the dining room which now seemed to be empty, as Riku had probably moved them all to the much larger living room.

"Hey, come back here!" He called out teasingly as he chased after her, she narrowly avoiding his grasp a couple of times before he caught her around the waist just as she passed the table.

She tilted her head back against his chest and looked up at him as she asked, "What? Are you going to try and hold me hostage until I admit you're not cheating?"

"I'm thinking about it." Sora answered honestly, a small grin on his face.

As Riku walked into the room, he commented in an unsurprised voice, "Already off to a strong start with the PDA, I see." Sora dropped his hands back to his sides, embarrassed, but Kairi didn't really seem to care. Pointing his fingers at them, he added, "No alcohol for you two. I don't even want to know what you'd be like after that."

Kairi crossed her arms defiantly, "I'll have a glass of wine if I want to."

"Just one?" Riku raised an eyebrow and his voice sounded full of doubt.

"…Maybe. We'll see."

Sora watched them curiously, assuming there was probably some sort of story behind their conversation that he wasn't getting.

"Well, Sora or Selphie have to deal with you this time, not me." He reminded her with a wave of his hand before starting to head back into the living room, Kairi sticking her tongue out at his back

"What was that about?" The brunette asked from behind her.

She turned around slowly to face him, sheepishly explaining, "I got ridiculously drunk one time to the point where I made myself sick and he won't let it go."

Sora frowned and avoided her eyes, knowing exactly what year and why without her giving an explanation.

"Hey," Kairi called to him softly, putting both her hands on his shoulders and resting her arms against his chest, "Don't linger on that too much, okay? It was a long time ago now, it never happened again, and you're here now." When his cobalt eyes finally flickered back to hers, she pressed herself closer to him and smiled, "Let's have fun." With that, she began to walk backwards, pulling him towards the living room where there was now loud music accompanied by many voices and the sound of laughter.

"U-um." He hesitated as she turned around, still tugging him by one hand.

She stopped, turning back and asking softly, "You okay?"

"Yeah, it's just been a long time since I've been around this many people. Practically everyone on the island between the ages of fourteen and twenty five is going to be here tonight, you know?" He answered quietly.

"Are you worried about the people who are weird about you leaving the islands?" She titled her head.

He nodded and admitted, "Them and a few others."

"Well, if anyone has a problem with you, I'll drag them outside and beat them up." She leaned in towards him, whispering into his ear, "Then they'll have to live with the fact a girl in a princess costume kicked their ass."

Sora laughed loudly for a minute. He wasn't sure if she got what he meant when he said 'a few others', but he was hoping so, because that made the idea even greater. After he calmed down a bit, he kissed her cheek and motioned her forward, "Alright. Now that I know we've got a plan, I'm ready."

"Okay." She smiled sweetly, taking his hand and leading him into the room.

It was easy enough to slip into the conversation since the amount of people was still relatively small, making it easier for Sora. But by the time more people started to show up, he was already feeling pretty comfortable; comfortable enough that he even managed to slip away from Kairi and Riku, though they were both still visible. He was still mostly talking to people he was relatively close with, like Tidus and Wakka, but he eventually wandered over to a few others like Serah and Vanille, getting to know them a little better.

When Serah's boyfriend Snow pulled the two away to some of his friends and Sora was left alone again, he considered raiding Riku's snack table again. Starting to turn around, he felt himself accidentally bump into someone. Reaching out to catch their shoulders, he apologized, "Oops! I'm sorry, I kinda forget how much space these wings take up." Letting go once he had gotten her up right, he studied her. She looked familiar but he couldn't quite figure out why. She was a slender girl with wavy brunette hair and gorgeous green eyes, dressed in a body hugging red dress that resembled the pattern of a ladybug, black thigh highs and heels.

She laughed at his comment, answering, "It's okay." Taking a closer look at him as well, she squinted her eyes and questioned, "Wait. Are you Sora?"

"Yeah, that's me." He answered sheepishly, not sure of what else to say.

She pointed to herself and smiled, "I'm Aya, remember? We used to have homeroom together before…" She paused, trying to think of the right word. Laughing a little, she continued, "Well, before the universe fell into chaos is the best way to put it, I guess."

He laughed at her wording as well as he searched his memories, "Aya! Right, I remember now."

She smiled a bit wider at his recognition, responding, "It's good to see you again. But I'm sure it's kinda boring being back here, right?"

"In some ways." He admitted with a small smile, continuing, "But it kind of gets tiring being away from home for so long, too."

"I can imagine. I'm sure I've only heard just a tiny bit of what happened, but you're so brave!" She gushed, taking a step closer to him, "I can't even _imagine_ doing everything you've had to do. I don't think I could."

Sora scratched the back of his neck sheepishly, "I just did what I had to, really."

Aya pushed his shoulder playfully, "Don't be modest! I mean, if it wasn't for you, the islands wouldn't even be here right now!"

"I guess so." He shrugged, giving an awkward smile.

"Seriously, you're amazing." She reached out to touch her hand against Sora's arm, smiling widely.

And for Kairi, that was enough. She stepped in, putting on her sweetest smile as she tugged Sora's sleeve gently, "Hey, Sora. Riku wants to talk to you."

"Okay." He answered, looking back to the girl he had been talking to, "It was nice to see you, Aya."

"Same to you." She gave a little wave as Kairi lead him away.

Once Kairi had pulled him away from the crowd of people and up the stairs, where no one else was allowed to go other than themselves and Riku, Sora gave her a questioning look, "So where's Riku?"

"I lied." Kairi admitted with a huff, leaning against the wall behind her.

"Why?" He held his hands up, confused.

She gave him a questioning look, "She was flirting with you."

"I thought she was just being friendly and asking questions." He answered honestly, "And even if she was, I wasn't flirting back."

"I know." Kairi bit her lip, "But still. I can't just really stand by and watch her do it."

Sora's lips parted in disbelief before he questioned in an amused tone, "Wait. You were jealous?"

She crossed her arms, embarrassed, "Yeah, so?" He began to laugh and she felt her cheeks start to burn, snapping back, "What's so funny about that?"

"It's funny," He leaned in towards her but kept himself a few inches away, still grinning as he continued, "Because you don't need to worry. At all."

Kairi gave a tiny smile, but her voice sounded doubtful, "Why's that?"

Sora reached out to cup the sides of her face, "You're smart, brave, kind, beautiful…" He moved his hands downward, his fingertips tracing her frame. One of his hands stopped at the top of her hip, though the other wandered just past her skirt, stopping at her thigh as he continued, "Incredibly sexy…" His eyes flickered back up to hers as she shivered from his touch, her mouth falling open in surprise. Smirking a bit from her reaction, he leaned in even closer to her and finished, "No one else could ever compare."

He had quite literally left her breathless, which was a first for her. She normally always had some sort of witty response at hand, but now her heart was racing in her chest and coherent thoughts were nearly impossible with Sora lingering so close.

And it was obvious he could tell, letting out a small chuckle at her expense; his warm breath tickling her cheek. Shooting him a small glare, Kairi did the only thing she knew would make him shut up. She closed the tiny distance between them, her hands moving behind his back as she mashed her lips to his. His fangs were still relatively noticeable as he kissed her back eagerly, though it didn't take long to get used to the sensation; or at least to get distracted by another. Sora gripped her thigh a little tighter, intensifying the kiss. She melted into him as she kissed him back, her hands wandering up and down his back.

"Really?" They heard Riku's voice from the stairs, followed by his footsteps until he reached the top and stopped behind him, "This is exactly what I was talking about earlier."

Kairi made a little noise in surprise and Sora broke the kiss and lowered his head, but didn't budge otherwise. "Didn't drink a thing." He answered loudly.

"Half a glass. Maybe not even that much." Kairi answered as well, though hers was in much more of a mumble of annoyance.

"Great. I don't know if that makes it better or worse." They heard him start walking again, and they both pulled back from each other, turning slightly to watch him, "Well, consider this as me kicking you back downstairs. I was just on my way to the bathroom." He motioned towards the door on his right.

Kairi rolled her eyes, "Sir, yes, sir."

"We're going." Sora answered seriously, allowing Riku to retreat behind the door. Touching his forehead against hers, he joked quietly, "Quit getting me in trouble."

"You get yourself into trouble." She replied with a smile before pulling herself out of his grasp and turning towards the stairs.

Sora quickly fired back with an amused smile, "_You_ were the one that brought us up here."

She put her hands on her hips, briefly turning back to look at him as she said, "And you were the one who tried to seduce me." She started down the stairs.

He rushed forward and reached out to catch her waist, asking in a laugh, "Seduce you?"

"Yeah." Kairi nodded, "Trying to taint my heart of pure light with your darkness." She teased, feathering her fingers against his chest.

"In that case…" He started to return his arm to his side but she almost immediately reached out to grab his hand back.

She pouted and gripped his hand tightly, "I was just kidding."

"I know." He guided her down the last few stairs. When she had made it down the floor, Sora leaned down to whisper into her ear, "Besides, you tried to seduce me first; in my own bed." He grinned as he pulled back, finishing, "So I don't believe your innocent act."

Kairi playfully punched him in the shoulder, "I did not! That was just… practice."

"Practice?" He repeated with a raised eyebrow.

"Exactly." She tugged on his hand, not bothering to clarify, "Let's get back to the party before Riku kills us."

He let her drag him back into the living room, numerous eyes watching them as they walked in. Most people seemed amused, though there were a few judgmental stares as well. But for the first time since returning home, Sora didn't care.


	14. Winter Chills

**Author's note**: **honestly this chapter turned out completely different than what I expected it to. Sora and Kairi just kinda did their thing and I went with it. Next chapter should be more back on track to what I had originally planned. **

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Thirteen: Winter Chills

It was all too clear that winter was beginning to loom over the islands as Sora laid in his bed, the chill in his room tempting him to stay under the covers and go back to sleep. Just yesterday he had been in a world that was in the midst of summer and he already missed it so badly. Sure, the islands didn't get nearly as cold as it did on other worlds during the winter, but it was cold enough.

Groaning a bit as he rolled out of bed and put his feet on the cold floor, he quickly scurried from dresser to dresser to change into jeans, a long sleeve shirt and a hoodie, leaving his dirty clothes in his wake. Finishing the rest of his morning routine, he nearly bumped into his mom after opening the door to the bathroom.

"You're up early for a Sunday." She laughed.

"Gotta take advantage of my free time." He grinned, taking a step out of the door so he could let her in.

She lingered in the doorway, turning slightly towards him, "So you're on your way out, then?"

"Yeah. I've got some things I wanna talk about with Riku and Kairi. But since it's Sunday, they both always have homework, papers, yadda yadda." He made a talking motion with his hand, "So I'll be back probably long before dinner."

His mom shook her head with a smile, reminding him, "You know you'll have to worry about all that stuff again soon, right?"

Sora gave an over dramatic sigh, "Don't remind me. I won't worry about it till school actually starts."

Two weeks ago he had finally gotten the time, as well as the bravery, to venture over to the university. Along with a letter from the high school, Riku and Kairi had both personally stopped by to see the dean's office about Sora's situation. He was thinking they would give him a hard time, especially because he still had no idea what he even wanted to do, but they turned out to be very accommodating.

Unlike Kairi and Riku, he was going to only be a part-time student. But, he would also take classes during summer and winter while they had breaks. That way, he had a workload he could handle but also wouldn't get too far behind. After they had gotten that down pact, they started talking about majors so they could help him pick out what classes to take. Though they discussed a few with him, they all decided it was best for him to stay undecided for a semester or two and signed up for general education classes.

And with that, he was officially going to be a university student in January.

"It's only little less than two months away!" She replied in a sing-song voice.

"Meh." Sora grumbled as he started to walk away, "I'll see you later." His mom laughed and went into the bathroom, closing the door behind her.

The brisk air hit him even harder the moment he walked out the door, the wind cutting against his face and encouraging him to walk even faster. While he was glad Kairi's apartment was closer than her parents' house was, he was still wishing that she lived as close as Riku did so that he wouldn't have to deal with cold. Even after putting up his hood and tucking his hands in his pockets, he felt very little relief.

By the time he knocked on their door, his teeth were chattering and it felt like forever while he waited for the door to open.

Selphie answered, still in her pajamas and music blaring from the earphones dangling from her neck. She gave him a tired wave and retreated back inside, leaving the door open, "Morning. Kairi's still asleep."

Stepping inside and closing the door behind him once he had ditched his shoes, he followed her into the living room and asked quietly, "Really? Isn't it almost 9:30?"

She shrugged, taking a spot on the couch and curling her legs underneath herself. Draping a blanket over her legs, she went back to reading the magazine that she had left on the table.

Making his way to Kairi's door, he tapped it lightly with the back of his hand and heard her answer, "Come in!"

Opening the door and poking his head in, he commented, "So, you are awake." She was still laying down in her bed, almost completely covered by her comforter.

"Sort of." She mumbled in response, "I didn't really expect you to be up this early, either."

"Sorry." He closed the door and took a seat on her bed, letting his legs dangle over the side but twisting his torso towards her.

"It's okay." She reached one of her hands out of the blanket to lightly grasp his, closing her eyes and smiling as she asked, "So, how'd it go?"

He made a face and shrugged, "Okay. Not a whole lot happened… But I do have some exciting news for you."

Kairi peeked one eye open at that, intrigued, "Oh? And what's that?"

"If you can get off work, I've got a trip coming up that you and Riku could come along for shortly after your birthday."

He hadn't even finished talking by the time she had sprung up into a sitting position, her face very close to his as she asked, "_Really?_"

Sora squinted at her and let out a little laugh, "Of course really. I wouldn't lie about that."

"I'll go in today and talk to my manager." Kairi seemed like she was ready to jump out of bed and run down to the coffee shop right at that exact moment, her voice very rushed, "So what are the dates, exactly?"

"It's the tenth and the eleventh. But don't you have a shift tomorrow?" He held her shoulders, "I don't think waiting till then will really make a big difference."

She sighed, but admitted, "I know. I'm just really excited." She kissed his cheek, "Thank you."

"You're welcome." He smiled at her before she slipped out of his grasp and off the bed. Tilting his head, he asked, "So where are you going?"

"Just to the bathroom. I'll be right back." She moved towards the door.

"Oh. Okay." He continued to sit up for a few moments after she left the room, but eventually found himself stretching out across her bed and closing his eyes.

Before he realized what happened, he heard Kairi's voice from above him, "I leave for five minutes and you fall back asleep?"

She tried her best to give a stern glare but when Sora blinked his eyes open and looked up at her with a grin, she couldn't help but smile.

"It's cold and your bed is comfy." He replied sleepily, watching her move closer to him.

Leaning over him, she asked, "You haven't had breakfast yet, have you?" She was still wearing her pajamas, pink plaid pants as well as a white t-shirt with some sort of graphic on it, but her hair had obviously been brushed through.

"Nope." Sora closed his eyes again and Kairi rolled hers. After several sleepovers throughout their childhood, Riku and Kairi had both found out fast that Sora was hopeless in the mornings before he had food.

"Well that explains everything." She stood back up, acknowledging with a faked sigh, "I guess I'll have to make something for you."

"Pancakes?" He suggested eagerly, tilting over onto his side to face her.

Kairi shrugged, "I guess I can do that."

"Thank you." He grinned again before plopping back down and closing his eyes.

Kairi huffed as she walked back over to the bed and pulled on the sleeve of his hoodie, "That doesn't mean you get to go back to sleep! You should at least go sit out in the living room and keep me company while I'm cooking."

"Why can't Selphie do that?" He asked in a tired grumble.

She pouted, still pulling on him, "She already started getting ready for work. _Pleaaase._"

"Okay, fine…" He finally sat up and slid off the bed, kissing her to make up for the hard time he was giving her.

After somewhat accepting his apology, she led him out to the living room and dropped him off by the couch, warning, "Don't fall back asleep!" After rounding the corner and going into the kitchen, she gave him another testing look from behind the bar.

Sora waved her off, laying down across the couch but made sure that he was still facing her so she wouldn't complain. The couch wasn't nearly as comfortable as her bed had been, but it was still tempting to shut his eyes and go back to sleep. But any time he tried, he would immediately hear some sort of loud groan from Kairi. "I'm just blinking! Am I not allowed to do that?" He looked over towards her with a frown.

"I'm pretty sure blinking doesn't require you to close your eyes for five seconds or more." She retorted, her back towards him as she focused on flipping the pancake she was currently working on.

Followed by the sound of a door closing, Selphie walked out into the living room wearing a black dress, tights, and a nice pea coat. "I'm going to go ahead and get out of here before you two kill each other." She gave them both a small glance, turning back to Kairi as she said, "I'll see you later tonight."

Kairi turned around with a small laugh, "Bye, Selphie. Hope you have a good shift."

"Bye." Sora echoed.

"Thanks!" Selphie answered before heading out the front door.

Sitting up a little, he asked, "So where does she work, anyway?"

"She's a waitress at the Boathouse." Kairi answered as she turned back to the stove.

He shook his head, "Figures she would work at the fanciest place on the island."

"What can I say, she works really hard for what she wants. She makes really good tips too." She added as she put the last pancake at the top of her pile, then reaching up to turn off the stove.

Seeing that the food was done, he sat up straight and moved his feet to the floor, "Did you ever think about working there?"

She shrugged, admitting with a small smile, "Kind of. But I like where I work… I think being a waitress would just be too hectic. Plus Selphie is… Selphie. I'm sure I wouldn't get nearly the same amount of tips that she does." She turned and opened the refrigerator door, digging out things that Sora couldn't see.

"I disagree." He answered immediately.

"You're a little biased, don't you think?" She peeked up at him for a moment as she worked on putting together their plates.

"Maybe, but c'mon, Kairi. Even if you're not as outgoing as Selphie, you're still definitely really good with people. And your looks alone would win some people over." With a slight frown, he looked to his feet and admitted, "I saw how some guys looked at you at school, but most never said anything to you since me and Riku were always around."

"Yeah, and I'm glad for that, because I really don't like that sort of attention." She gave a loud, annoyed sigh, "After I went through that whole serial dating…thing… I snapped on a few guys. Even got labeled as a psycho for a little while." She let out a little laugh, "But whatever; they deserved it."

Sora snorted, "Well, I know how strong you are, so I know better than to piss you off."

"Which is why you're the one that's sitting here in my apartment about to be served breakfast." Kairi waved him over to the dining room table.

Grinning, he jumped up and made his way over to the table, where Kairi placed his plate of pancakes, strawberries and whipped cream in front of him as he sat down. His mouth falling open in surprise, he commented, "_Wow_. I was just expecting plain pancakes, not all this. Thanks, Kai!"

She squinted, seemingly caught off guard. She put down a glass of orange juice next to his plate before standing back up with her hand on her hip, "Thanks, but… Kai?"

"I, uh…" He stuttered, unsure of what to say, "I don't know. It just came out."

"Hmm." She hummed to herself as she put down her own plate and glass of juice across from him.

Sora watched her as she sat down, "Should I not call you that?"

She shook her head and started to cut into her pancakes, "No, it's okay."

"Are you sure?" He asked softly, still not touching his food.

She put her silverware down and looked back up to him, "Really, it's fine. I have a few bad memories associated with that nickname, yeah, but that's not your fault. Keep using it and turn it into something positive; I'd rather you do that than avoid it." She nudged his legs with her feet, causing him to smile.

He let out a little breath of air, "Okay." With a pause, he added, "I know you don't like talking about everything that happened when I was gone but… I'm still pretty much completely in the dark, here. You've helped me a lot with everything I've been going through, so it'd be nice to be able to return the favor."

"I know." She frowned, "I will, I promise. It's not even anything that serious, it's just that we're pretty much always having fun together and I don't want to ruin the moment."

Sora smiled and laughed a little as he asked, "So what, we need to set aside a day to talk about negative stuff?"

"Maybe." Kairi smiled, too. "Now eat your food before it gets cold." She reached over and stuck her fork into one of his pancakes, ripping off a small piece from the edge and eating it.

Sora made a circle with his arms and shielded his plate while giving her a half-hearted glare, "No, stop it! I'll eat now."

"Good." Kairi went back to eating her own food, asking a few moments later, "So, what are your plans for the rest of the day?"

He took a bite and spoke while he chewed, "Stay here for a little while, then go talk to Riku about the trip as well. That's about it. I figured you'd both be starting to study for exams."

She sunk down into her chair, "I should, but I don't want to."

Sora watched her curiously, "Seems like you actually want me to distract you from your work for once."

"Maybe I do." She nudged his leg with her foot again, careful to keep her expression neutral and to focus on the little food that she had left.

Finishing his plate and laying his silverware on top of it, he smirked, "Guess you must have _really_ missed me this time."

"I always miss you when you're gone." She batted her eyelashes over dramatically as she stood up, taking her plate and reaching out to take Sora's.

He caught her hand, answering, "More than usual, I mean. But anyway, let me do the dishes since you made this for me."

She smiled as she slipped her hand out of his, gently putting her plate down on top of his, "Thanks." She touched his shoulder briefly before heading back out into the living room.

After gathering all the dishes and dumping them into the sink, he looked up at Kairi as he let the water run. She was in the same spot that he had been early, though she was watching him contentedly instead of falling asleep. He smiled to himself as he spread the dish soap and began to scrub everything down with the brush he had found lying behind the faucet.

Once everything had been rinsed and placed in the drying rack, he finally made his way over to Kairi. She looked up at him with a sweet smile, pointing to his face, "You've still got a little whip cream right here."

He had an idea of what her agenda actually was, but he played along. "Really?" He stuck out his tongue and licked the corner of his lips.

"I'll get it." She held out one of her arms and motioned him towards her, "Come here." She reached up to lightly cup his face and kissed him just below his cheek, which to his surprise actually _did_ have whip cream on it. Nonetheless, she still did exactly as he thought she would; swiftly moving towards his lips, as well as reaching out to tug on his hoodie so that she could pull him down, closer to her. After a few minutes of awkwardly leaning over, Sora pulled away long enough to kneel down on the couch before kissing her again.

Though he had been the one to initially start letting his hands wander, Kairi surprised him when her lips and tongue strayed downward. His breath caught in his throat as she made a trail across his jaw line and down the side of his neck, lingering there for a moment. Sora relished the sensation, closing his eyes and letting out the breath of air that he'd been holding in. Eventually, he couldn't take it anymore.

"Kairi." He called out her name and she immediately stopped, looking up at him curiously.

Sora crashed against her again, kissing her roughly and almost as desperately as he had when he first returned home. She smirked against his lips as she realized that she had the power to affect him like that any time she wanted. She kissed him back with equal force until he started to ease her backwards onto the couch.

He followed the same path as she did, though his kisses were lighter and he was a little more adventurous, managing to wander all the way down to her collar bones. He wanted to make her feel just as good, and the little gasps and noises that Kairi made let him know that he succeeded. Pushing his weight off of her, he hovered over her to kiss her again; this time slowly and tenderly. After he pulled away again, he sat up straight and moved a little bit away from her, admitting, "I've gotta stop or you really will get nothing done today." Laughing a bit, he glanced back at her to add, "And I need to get to Riku before he dives headfirst into his books, too."

"That's fair." Kairi smiled as pushed herself up, smoothing out her shirt once she had done so. "I love you." She leaned in to kiss him on the cheek, lingering by his ear as she continued, "Tell Riku that he better be able to come."

Sora raised an eyebrow, "Or else…what?"

"I don't know yet. I'll think of something." She pulled away from him with a pout.

"I love you too." He briefly brushed his hand against her arm as he stood up, "Definitely keep thinking about that threat. Riku's too busy for his own good, so we'll probably need it."


	15. Pressure

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Fourteen: Pressure

"Can we go upstairs? Your floor is really cold." Sora stood in the front hallway of Riku's house, his arms wrapped around himself.

"I guess. You're lucky I was studying in my room, anyway." Riku walked past him and up the stairs, "If you ask me, it feels refreshing."

Sora shook his head as he followed after him, "Refreshing is the beginning of fall or spring. This is just miserable and it's only going to get worse."

Riku didn't respond, continuing to walk to his room. Once he had sat down at his desk and shuffled around some of his books, he asked, "So what was this really important question that you needed to ask?"

"It feels so much nicer up here." Sora commented happily to himself as he sat on the carpeted floor of Riku's room, leaning his back against the foot of the bed. When Riku's question finally registered in his brain, he answered enthusiastically, "Oh, right. Well, I have plans for all of us to go on a trip to another world right after Kairi's birthday, on the tenth and eleventh. It's not exactly a vacation because there's still work to be done and stuff, but I promised Kairi I would try to include you guys when I could so… please tell me you can come?"

Riku turned around to face him, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly, "You're getting really good at pressuring me to make decisions, lately."

Sora flashed a quick smile, "Sorry. It's just because it's not the same without all three of us. I mean, I know you won't be able to make it every single time I ask this, but this time's for Kairi's birthday, you know. _Please_ try to make it happen." He pleaded, scooting a bit closer to Riku and pouting for an extra dramatic effect.

"I'll do my best." Riku turned his head away, back towards the desk.

Sora laughed excitedly, jumping up to give him a quick hug, "Thank youuu!"

Riku returned the hug awkwardly until Sora plopped back down on the floor. "Have you even asked Kairi yet?" He asked, absent-mindedly flipping through a few pages of the book closest to him.

The younger boy smiled, "Yeah, I told her first thing this morning. She was so excited she jumped out of bed and was literally going to run to her work to ask her manager about it." He finished with a laugh.

"Oh, did you just go to her apartment last night instead of going home?" Riku glanced back to him curiously.

Sora looked utterly confused and his cheeks turned a slight shade of pink, "No, I just went over as soon as I woke up this morning… Why would you think that?"

"You've been dating for a little over three months," Riku shrugged, "I figured you've probably stayed over there a couple of times by now."

"I—we…" He tried to string a sentence together, but his face was burning and his mind seemed to have stop working completely, "We haven't—"

Riku held out his hand in front of Sora's face, "Stop, before you manage to break your brain. I get it."

"We're just working our way up to it gradually." Sora managed to reply in a squeak, growing more and more embarrassed by the moment.

"You really don't have to defend your sex life or lack thereof, Sora." Riku shook his head, "You and Kairi do whatever's best for you two. I was just guessing, you don't need to be embarrassed."

He folded his arms and let out a small huff of air as he tried to change the subject as rapidly as possible, "So, anyway, I told her to just wait until tomorrow until she has a shift. But the coffee shop's pretty well staffed; I don't think she'll have any issues. So that just leaves you. And Kairi told me to say that you'd better come 'or else'." He made quotation marks with his fingers.

"Well, there's a slight chance I might have to find out what 'or else' actually means, because I can't promise anything." Riku let out a small laugh, "But like I said, I'll try my best." Sora smiled a little from his answer, but an awkward silence came over them before Riku thought of another question. "By the way, how is that whole balancing thing going? I know you've still got to add school into the mix eventually, but is it at least getting somewhat easier?"

"Uh, yeah. I guess so." Sora shifted his arms behind his head, "It's not so bad when I have Donald and Goofy with me. But I've been by myself the past two trips and all I could think about was how much I wanted to come home." He stretched out his legs, "Actually, it's kinda funny you brought up that conversation. Remember how I was talking about how it's going to be when I'm married and have kids and all that?"

Riku squinted, confused, "Yeah, what about it?"

"Well, finding out Ariel and Eric had gotten married and had a baby the next day just really put into perspective how long I'd been gone." Sora looked towards the door, lost in thought as he rambled on, "Like, imagine if we'd all been just a little bit older and I could have come home to you two in that situation. I barely even could consider the thought of coming home to find out Kairi was just in a relationship because it hurt too much so thinking about it like that is just so crazy. Plus I never would have forgiven myself if I missed out on something so important for either of you."

Riku laughed a little, unsure of what to say. "Well, all you missed out on was school, really. I guess prom, if you cared about that. And graduation, but I hope we made up for that."

"Yeah, you did." He smiled appreciatively, but quickly frowned again, "And yeah, I try not to think about prom. That's one of the pictures Kairi has in her wall in her room that I've been too afraid to look at."

Riku snorted. "You shouldn't be too afraid to look because we just went together as friends. I'm pretty sure that picture is of me, Kairi, Noel and Yuel."

"Really?" Sora gave a small grin, feeling a bit stupid but also very relieved.

"Yeah, really." Riku laughed, "I bet none of those pictures are as scary as you think they are."

Sora's shoulders sunk a little, "Kairi gave me a pretty short summary of everything that happened while I was gone, but… I don't really know the details, so I still feel pretty weird about it."

Riku angled himself back towards him, "Think about everything she's said to you. Does it really seem like she has any fond memories of the past three years?"

He blinked, "Well, no, but—"

"Then what are you scared of?" Riku raised an eyebrow.

Sora's mouth hung open, but he didn't have a real answer. "I don't know."

"So, as usual, you're worrying about nothing." Riku reached down to ruffle his hair, earning a small glare from Sora, "Just give her time and she'll tell you."

"I know _that_." Sora defended, tilting his neck so that his head was out of Riku's reach, "She told me she wants to tell me, but there's never really a good time. Because we're always having so much fun together and she doesn't want to ruin the moment."

"So you didn't even need to talk to me, she already said everything you need to know."

"What?"

Riku let out a loud sigh, "I swear, Sora. You have the thickest skull in the entire universe." He reached down to flick his friend's forehead, "Kairi's happier than she's been since before we left the islands, maybe even happier than she's ever been, and it's because of_ you_."

"_Hey_! Ouch…" Sora winced and rubbed his temple with two of his fingers. Once he'd gotten over the pain, his lips curled into a small smile, "You think so?"

He threw up his hands, "Everyone thinks so. Selphie wouldn't have given you another chance if she didn't think so, right? And like I said, Kairi basically told you herself."

"You know how I am with Kairi; my brain turns off when I'm around her. It's honestly a miracle that she even likes me." Sora shrugged, glancing off for a moment.

"Yeah, I'm still trying to figure out exactly why she picked you over me." Riku teased, turning back around to his desk so that his back would face Sora.

Sora let out a scoff and stood up, "On that note, I think I'll go home now."

"Good. You're distracting me from studying." Riku still didn't look at Sora, his eyes focused on the book in front of him as he waved his hand towards the door.

Sora rolled his eyes before breaking into a grin, "See ya later, Riku."

"_Bye_, Sora." He flashed a quick smile in response.

oxoxoxoxoxo

"So, how's it feel to be twenty?" Sora asked smugly as he offered his hand.

"Not much different." Kairi copied his answer in a nonchalant tone as she grabbed his hand, letting him pull her up from her seat.

Riku chimed in from the other side of the table, "Don't worry. You'll feel the fun being replaced by adult responsibilities soon enough."

Kairi rolled her eyes, "Just because you're a better liar than Sora doesn't mean that I'm going to believe you."

"Literally everyone in the universe is a better liar than Sora." Selphie added as she made her way around the table to Kairi's side.

Sora made a face as he grabbed a few of Kairi's presents, including his own, "Is that supposed to be a bad thing?"

"It's not for me." Kairi reached out to grip his hand as he came closer to her, giving it a quick squeeze before leading him and everyone else outside, "Thanks for lunch, everybody." After the chorus of "you're welcome", she looked to Riku and Selphie, "I wish you guys could make it out to dinner."

"Yeah, thanks for leaving me alone." Sora mumbled to Riku and Kairi immediately elbowed him in the side, "Ow!"

It wasn't that Kairi's parents didn't like him, he had just always been extremely awkward around them. More specifically Kairi's dad.

He had never particularly liked Sora, though he never really disliked him either. When Kairi and Sora were just friends, there wasn't much he could say but it seemed like his negative feelings grew once they started dating.

Not that Sora could blame him. He'd never been the smartest or most responsible guy on the island and now he had a pretty unstable future on top of that, even though he was trying his best to make ends meet. Still, it was understandable for Kairi's dad to think he didn't deserve her. Sora still had his moments where he didn't think he did, either.

But there she was.

"You'll be fine." She rolled her eyes, "He's not going to say anything. Not tonight."

"He'll probably be too much of a mess to even worry about you. He's super emotional over Kairi growing up." Selphie added with a laugh.

Sora bit his lip, thinking, "Hm." It definitely would work in her dad didn't pay attention to him, but if he was overly emotional that could also be an easy way to set him off. Feeling a hand on his shoulder, he looked up to see Riku.

"Just remember that if anything goes wrong, you have an advantage over everyone else in this world; you have a way off of it." He winked.

Sora laughed, "Hey, that's true!"

"Ugh. Don't encourage him, Riku." Kairi looked over to him with a pout.

"Sorry." Riku's hand slipped back down to his side and he stopped, "Anyway, it's back to studying for me… I'll call you guys when I'm done with my exam tomorrow so we can finish packing up the gummi ship."

"Good luck!"

"See you tomorrow!"

Kairi turned towards Sora and tilted her head, "Aren't you going home too?"

He raised the arm that had several bags hanging off it, "I figured I would help carry this stuff back to your apartment first."

"Me and Selphie can handle it." She motioned the other girl forward before giving him a stern look, "I wanna make sure you have time to pick out something nice to wear _and_ not leave your room like a bomb went off."

Selphie reached out her hands, wiggling her fingers, "C'mon, give 'em up."

"Fine, you win." He held them out for Kairi and Selphie to take, "So should I meet you at your apartment?"

Kairi shook her head as she took her share of the presents, "No, I know how much you hate walking in the cold. I'll come over here."

He frowned, "I mean, I don't enjoy it but I can handle it—"

"Go get ready." She interrupted him and gave him a light push forward, smiling as she did so.

He stepped forward again to hug her, careful not to squash her presents as he leaned in to kiss her cheek, "See you in a little while."

"6:30 sharp, got it?" She grinned as she pulled away.

Sora started to turn, "7:30, got it."

"_Sora_!" He heard her whine loudly.

"I'll be ready, don't worry."


	16. Too Fast, Too Slow

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Fifteen: Too Fast, Too Slow

"Sora!" He heard Kairi's voice only a moment before he was nearly knocked over by the force of her body crashing against his. "Thank you so much for your present." She hugged him as tightly as she could, "I love it so much. It made me cry."

He grinned widely as he hugged her back, carefully slipping his hands between her back and her backpack, "You're welcome."

"How did you get all of those pictures of the three of us?" She leaned back, looking at him curiously.

"I dug around my house, got some from Riku, and a few from your parents too." He let out a smile laugh, admitting, "It took a while…"

'_A little too long'_, he thought. Now he was completely clueless as to what to get her for Christmas since he had put so much energy into this gift.

She smiled sweetly before pecking his lips, "Thank you, again. It's just too perfect." Giggling, she reached up to touch his hair, "I think my favorite page is all of our graduation pictures together. Mostly because of your cap."

"Yeah, me and hats don't really go well together." He laughed as well. "I really liked putting it together, too. It made me feel like I got to experience some of the things I missed, in a way. Plus I'm looking forward to taking pictures for it in the future."

"That's great, Sora." She answered enthusiastically before pulling away from him, though she held their hands together still, "Speaking of the things you missed… Remember what I said about setting up a day to talk?"

He tilted his head, "Yeah, but I thought you were joking."

She shrugged, "I kind of was… but I want to tell you soon because I know it's been making you uncomfortable and I just want to get it over with, too. So I want to talk about it shortly after we get back."

"Whenever you want." Sora kissed her forehead, "But we should get moving. Don't want to keep Riku waiting too long."

"Right, right." She nodded and let go of his hands, both beginning to walk. "So," Kairi called to him in the sweetest voice she could muster, "Can you tell me what world we're going to now? _Please_?"

He made a face as he considered his options, "I guess I could. But I might need a little more convincing that I shouldn't keep it a surprise."

"Please." She repeated, putting on her best pout and grabbing one of his hands, "I'll let you have some of my leftover birthday cake."

"That's a start." He shrugged thoughtfully, "But not enough."

Her shoulders fell and she whined, "_Sora_."

"C'mon, I'm not that hard to impress." He looked over to her with a grin, "Just think a little."

She slid in front of him to block his path, pressing both of her hands against his shoulders roughly as she leaned in to kiss him. And she held nothing back, her tongue pressing against his lips almost immediately.

Sora obliged and followed her lead, but was pretty shocked at how quickly she could turn from her usual sweet and gentle self into _this_.

It was actually kind of impressive.

The kiss was brief despite the intensity, but his head was completely spinning by the time she pulled away. Wide eyed, he mumbled the words, "_Damn_, Kairi." He usually didn't curse much, but he could think of nothing better to say.

And she seemed fairly proud of herself too, a smug look on her face as she asked, "Will you tell me now?"

"I'll tell you anything after that." He took a breath, "Radiant Garden. We're going to Radiant Garden."

She gave a brief smile before beginning to walk again, "It'll be nice to see everyone and see how the town's looking. They've got to be almost finished rebuilding by now, right?"

"Yeah, they were pretty much doing the finishing touches the last time I was there." He followed after her with his shoulders slumped, his mind becoming more clear from the little bit of disappointment he was feeling, "I thought you'd be more excited since it's your home world and all."

"I've told you before, _this_ is my home." She made a circular motion with her hand, "All of my memories and the people I care about most are here." She reached out to squeeze his hand, "And I am excited. Remember how I reacted when you first told me? Besides, you were the one saying we needed to hurry up before you made me beg."

She washed away any of the doubts he had when she squeezed his hand. Smiling widely, he admitted, "I guess I am guilty of that."

"I didn't mind _too _much." She answered in a suggestive tone and flashed a smile.

"I was honestly just expecting you to offer to make my favorite cookies for the Christmas party at Riku's or something." He raised an eyebrow and leaned in closer to her, "Are you sure you're a Princess of Heart? It seems like you've got more darkness than I do."

"Lust and love go hand in hand a lot of the time, it's not always linked to darkness." Kairi started off seriously before elbowing him lightly in the chest and winking, "So, whether you like it or not, I'm always going to be more innocent than you."

Sora mumbled to himself, "Lust, huh?"

He barely ever associated that word with his feelings for Kairi. Things like love and adoration, sure. Of course not all of his thoughts about her had been completely innocent, but he usually tried his best to stop his mind from wandering too far.

Despite the jokes he made, he did always believe that she was pure; that he needed to be careful around her and to go slowly because surely her wants were certainly different than his wants. Yet here she was, telling him that all of the thoughts he had been having were perfectly normal. That he'd probably been protecting her when he didn't need to _again_.

He truly was clueless.

"Hey, Kairi," Sora started out, sheepish and quiet.

"Yeah?" She tilted her head to look up at him.

He took a breath, "Do you think we're moving too slow? Or too fast?"

"Does it matter? We're almost there now." She pointed out.

"I, uh...I mean in our relationship." His eyes were focused on the ground and he felt like was fourteen years old again, so uncertain around her.

"Oh." Her lips parted in surprise, letting out a small laugh, "Well, maybe a little slow in the beginning, but I think we both really needed that. But it's perfect the way it is now. You kind of really surprised me with what you did at the Halloween party once we were away from everyone, but that was anything but a bad thing. I liked how confident you were."

Sora laughed at himself, "And of course I thought I went a little too far."

She shook her head, "Sora, I've only told you about a thousand times that you don't need to worry. If you do anything I don't like, I'll tell you. I'm not exactly shy, you know." She stroked his arm lightly with her free hand, "What exactly made you bring all of this up, anyway?"

"Just something Riku said." He answered automatically with a shrug.

Kairi suddenly seemed embarrassed and pulled away, though their hands remained linked together. "D-do you talk to him about what we do together? Isn't that kind of weird?"

"No!" He shook his head and waved his free hand, starting to blush as well, "No, I haven't told him anything like that. It's just that when I was at his house to ask him about this trip, I was talking about being with you that morning and he assumed I spent the night. So after what you said in combination with that, I just started worrying maybe I was being too hesitant."

"Just let me know whenever you're feeling unsure and we can talk about it." She swung their hands back and forth, "And I'll do the same for you."

He nodded, "Okay, I will. But for now, let's just focus on getting the gummi ship packed up."

"Aye, aye, Captain." She replied teasingly, putting two fingers up to her forehead and doing a salute.

Sora laughed and rolled his eyes, "Psh. If anything, you're the captain. This is supposed to be all for you."

"Hm." She smiled thoughtfully, "In that case, let's leave today."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down, Miss Over Eager. We all need to catch up on our sleep. Plus no one's expecting us until tomorrow." He continued to pull her along, the gummi ship finally coming into view.

She gave an overdramatic sigh, "Fiiiine…"

"At least you were planning on bringing Riku along this time." He lowered his voice.

Kairi squinted, "Of course. Why wouldn't I?"

"Well, you were the one suggesting that we took the raft without him." Sora reminded her with a raise of his eyebrows.

Her mouth fell open and she stumbled over her words for a moment before finally saying, "I was just trying to drop hints that I liked you because you were so oblivious. I wasn't serious."

"Okay, okay. If you say so." He laughed again as the approached the gummi ship's door. Letting go of Kairi's hand, Sora stuck his head in and called out loudly, "Riku?"

"Took you guys long enough." Riku emerged from the storage room, "I just finished loading up all my stuff."

Sora took a step in and shrugged, "We've just got to arrange everything, make sure it's strapped down and then make sure all the controls are working okay. It won't take too long."

Kairi stepped in after him, commenting sarcastically, "Good morning to you too, Riku."

He waved her off, moving towards the front of the gummi ship, "I'll let you two get to it."

"Alright." Sora walked to the storage room, Kairi following just behind him. "Do you have anything you don't want to get squished?" He glanced back to her.

"Um… Just this one." She grabbed a small purple bag off from the pile of things they'd loaded up the day before and held it in her arms.

He started grabbing bags from the floor and stuffing them onto the shelves, "Okay, just set it to the side for now and we'll put it up last."

She nodded, putting the purple bag down in a corner before reaching over to help Sora. Once they had gotten everything up off the floor, she asked, "You said something about straps?"

"Yeah. Uh…" He looked around the room before he finally found them hanging up above his head, "There they are." He reached up and handed some to Kairi before demonstrating, "So all you have to do is clip it through one of these little holes around the middle of this bar. Then just pull it across and clip the other side the same way and you're done."

"Seems easy enough." She clipped the first side easily, but struggled to pull the strap across far enough to make it to other side.

Sora gave a little smile, "Need help?"

"N-nope." She huffed, pulling harder until she finally managed to make it reach. Securing the clip to the other side, she exhaled, "Phew."

"Guess it's that whole arm strength thing, like you were talking about when I first got home." He shrugged.

She turned back to him with a smile, "Probably. But I should get some of that back starting tomorrow!"

"We'll see." He motioned to the straps still in her hands, "Do you want me to go ahead and do the rest of these?"

"If you don't mind." She dropped her straps into his open palm and pressed her lips against his cheek, "Thank you."

He closed his eyes and leaned slightly closer to her as she kissed him, smiling. "Sure."

"I'll get out of your way and wait outside the door." She slipped past him, her hand briefly grazing his shoulder as she did so.

As he started to work on the next strap, he heard Riku call out to Kairi, "Did you bribe Sora into doing something for you?"

She giggled, "Sort of. I didn't really have to bribe him, though."

"Can't say I'm surprised."

After finishing up, Sora stepped out into the main area of the gummi ship, "If you guys pick on me when I'm in earshot, I can imagine what you say by yourselves."

"Nothing but good things, of course." Kairi smiled widely with a rub of his shoulder.

"Right." He looked at her doubtingly.

Riku changed the subject, "So are you gonna check out all of this stuff?" He waved his hand over the control panel of the gummi ship, "It's been so long since I've touched any of this, I don't really remember how to do anything."

"Jeez. Guess I have to do everything around here." Sora made his way across the ship, nudging his friend out of the way. After he had pulled a few levers and flipped a few switches, the gummi ship's engine started with a loud roar, "See, that's all there is to it."

Riku crossed his arms, "I just needed a reminder."

As Sora shut down all of the controls, he turned his head to ask, "You want to fly it tomorrow, then?"

"Uh…" He reached up to scratch his neck sheepishly, "Probably not."

"Ah, how the tables have turned." Sora gloated with a wide grin, leaning back against the wall.

Riku rolled his eyes, "Enjoy it while you can."

"What's that supposed to mean?" The younger boy raised an eyebrow.

"After a few more of these trips off the islands, I'll be back to my usual self. Just wait." He started to head out of the gummi ship, "Let's lock up and head home."

Sora let out a huff of air but felt his annoyance fade away once he felt Kairi's hand on his shoulder, "You coming?"

"Yeah." He answered loudly before he leaned into whisper into Kairi's ear, "But maybe we _should_ go tonight; without Riku."

She smiled, answering, "We both know we'd feel extremely guilty tomorrow if we did. Especially you."

"Still. He deserves it." He whispered back, smiling as well.

"I think your ego will recover." She held his face in her hands briefly and smiled at him, then reached down to loop her arm around his and pulled him forward, "C'mon."


	17. Reunions

**Sorry this chapter took so long &amp; that it's a little short, this past month has been chaos… My grandfather passed away and shortly after that, I had TWO emergencies with two of my cats (out of three) and I had to take both of them to the vet within one week of each other. So my brain was just fried most of October… But I've finally finished this chapter lol. Hope you guys enjoy it! **

_I Can Barely Say_

Chapter Sixteen: Reunions

"Wow, you two have really grown up!" Yuffie circled Riku and Kairi, both smiling sheepishly as they watched her.

Sora crossed his arms, asking curiously, "What about me?"

"Huh? What do you mean?" She squinted and tilted her head.

Aerith chimed in, "You've grown up too, Sora. But we haven't seen Riku and Kairi in quite a while now."

"Yeah, I know. I was just kidding." He took a step back to give them more space, a little frown still clear on his face.

"This one'll always be a kid to me!" Cid reached over to roughly grab Sora's shoulders, causing everyone to turn their heads.

Sora huffed at first, but smiled as he said, "Thanks, Cid."

"Sorry, Sora, but I've got to say the same thing." Leon admitted with a small smile of his own.

His mouth dropped again, "Aw, c'mon, Leon! I've been able to take care of myself for how many years now?"

"Still. I'm always going to think of you as the goofy kid I first bumped into in Traverse Town."

"No problem with that. He still is a goofy kid." Riku commented, stepping between them.

Sora thought about sending a glare his way, but instead replied nonchalantly, "I'm the goofy kid who can let the Heartless have you for lunch if you're not careful."

Riku rolled his eyes, "Please. Like I can't protect myself from some Heartless."

"You're forgetting you're out of practice." He pointed out in response, "Don't worry, you'll apologize later when I have to save your butt."

"Right." Riku scoffed.

"Alright. Enough, you two." Kairi interrupted, holding her hands out between them.

Aerith gave a small giggle, "We really should let you go do your job."

"It was nice seeing everyone!" Kairi pushed Riku and Sora forward, who were still arguing under their breath, before she turned around to say, "We'll be back later for dinner!"

"See you then!" Yuffie called back.

"Would you two stop picking on each other for five seconds?" She sighed as they started walking, heading towards the outer garden.

"C'mon, Kairi. This is the first time _ever_ that I can brag that I'm better than Riku. Let me enjoy it." Sora whined, taking a step closer to her.

"Yeah, Kairi. Let him enjoy it." He smirked, "Because later he's gonna have to take it back."

Sora immediately shot back, "Am not!"

She groaned, reaching up to rub her forehead, "You know, I really didn't picture this trip starting off with you two both acting like you did when you were kids."

"But it's a good thing. Makes me feel more at home again." Sora laughed, "But I guess we can tone it down. Or I can, at least."

Riku shrugged, "Fine, I'll tone it down too."

"Thanks." She gave a small smile.

As they walked through town, many of the residents waved to the trio; a few specifically calling out to Sora and stopping to talk to him for a few minutes.

"Wow, seems like everyone here knows you almost as well as people do back home." Riku commented, a little bit intrigued.

"Well, this sort of was my home away from home, in a way." Sora scratched the back of his neck sheepishly, "Plus this is kinda where the chaos started. Even though there's been a lot of progress, there's still a lot of darkness lurking here from Xehanort's experiments… so Heartless tend to pop up here more often than on other worlds."

Kairi looked down at her feet with a frown, "Oh, wow…"

"Uh, well. Even if they're more common here, it's still pretty spread out now. They can go months here without any trouble. And even when there is, most of the time Leon and the gang can handle it." Sora quickly clarified, his voice a little nervous, "I think it's getting better with time."

"I hope so." She answered softly.

Sora started to frown until a familiar voice caught them all off guard, "Why the long face, princess?"

Kairi whirled around faster than any of them, immediately retorting, "I told you not to call me that!"

"Lea," Riku called out, surprised, "What are you doing here?"

"I live here? Besides, I wasn't going to let you guys take all the glory." He walked out in front of them, a smirk on his face.

With her hand on her hip, Kairi suggested, "We could leave all of them to you and let you have all the glory if you want."

He laughed nervously, admitting, "That might be a _little_ too much for me."

"I still swear you two could be brother and sister the way you two fight with each other." Riku smiled with a shake of his head.

Grinning, Sora chimed in, "Hey, Kairi. If Riku and I had to cut it out, shouldn't you try to get along with Lea, too?"

"That's right." Riku echoed.

"Oh, I will." Kairi looked entirely displeased as she stared at Sora, "But you're going to regret saying that."

His mouth fell open, pleading, "C—c'mon, Kairi, it was just a joke!" Her expression remained unchanged.

"They're dating now." Riku mumbled to Lea, though Sora wasn't paying attention.

"Ah." He nodded, "Finally."

"Tell me about it."

"Well, enough of this awkward stuff." Lea grabbed Sora's shoulder and tugged him forward a little bit before letting go, "Let's get to it before the Heartless spread to other parts of the town."

The brunette let out a little sigh, "Right." He led them through the entrance to the garden and Heartless immediately made their presence known, materializing out of nowhere and wasting no time in lunging towards the group. "Here we go!" Sora summoned his keyblade and rushed in, his friends following behind him before splitting up across the garden.

He hadn't been fighting long when he took a few blows from a Heartless. After lashing out in response and defeating it, he felt the warmth of a cure spell wash over him. "Wha?" He did a quick spin and spotted Kairi who gave him a brief smile as she continued fighting. "Thought you were mad at me." He commented loudly before moving on to another Heartless.

"I'm over it for now." She answered, sounding a little out of breath.

The new Heartless vanished into smoke with Sora's next strike, "Tell me if you need any help!"

"I'm fine for now." She took a breath, "Just a little tired."

He nodded, doubtful, "Uh huh. Okay."

As the Heartless seemingly began to clear out, he moved towards Riku, who seemed even more wiped out than Kairi had been when he last checked on her. "Cure." Sora lifted his keyblade in Riku's direction. Though it seemed to help a little bit, Riku was still slow in some of his movements.

"Thanks." He sighed before taking another strike.

"Do you want me to finish them off for you?" Sora suggested, "I mean, the sooner we're done, the sooner we can all go relax."

He could tell by his face that Riku wanted to say no to keep his pride. But in the end, he gave in, "Fine. Sure."

Sora gave a little smirk before effortlessly taking out the last two Heartless. Looking back at everyone, Lea seemed to be just a little tired while Riku and Kairi looked like they were both ready to collapse.

Scrunching his eyebrows, Lea looked over to the other two, "What's wrong with you guys?"

"They've gotten to slack off at home." Sora answered in an amused tone, dismissing his keyblade and putting his hands on his hips.

"I wouldn't call going to school slacking." Riku snapped back.

Kairi nodded and exhaled, "Yeah, what he said."

"I guess, but me and Sora are the ones doing all of the really hard work." Lea bragged before catching sight of Sora's stare, "Okay, well, maybe mostly Sora. But hey, I've kept this place safe when you're not around!"

"And I'm sure Leon, Isa, and everybody else have nothing to do with that." The brunette answered sarcastically.

Lea groaned, "Alright, alright. It's a team effort. But I'm the only one with a Keyblade here on a regular basis, so I do have to do some of the heavy lifting sometimes. At least give me that."

"Okay, I'll let you have that." He answered, letting his hands fall back down to his sides. Though Riku and Kairi had laughed a little during his and Lea's exchange, they still didn't look all the way recovered quite yet. "Are you guys gonna be okay to head back?" He tilted his head.

"Maybe at least half way. You might have to carry us after that." Kairi answered with a smile.

"Great." Sora laughed.

"In that case, consider yourselves left behind." Lea replied with a wave of his hand, "Unless Sora's carrying both of you."

He quickly shook his head, "No way. I'm pretty sure my spine would break. I don't even think I could lift Riku—maybe when we were closer to the same height, but not now."

"Thanks, Sora." His best friend answered in a mumble, "But really, we'll be fine. Let's just get going."

"Alright." He let Lea lead the way, hanging back to keep an eye on both Riku and Kairi since he was worried they were underplaying their conditions since it wouldn't be the first time. It frustrated him immensely, but they were both so stubborn that they truly believed what they said so it was a hard habit to get them to break.

Thankfully they managed to make it back to Merlin's house without issue, where they had a relaxing yet chaotic dinner. Merlin prepared most of the food with magic, but Aerith made a few things that, to be honest, were very odd. Too nice to really say anything about it, everyone ate them with no complaints. They weren't really _bad_ to Sora, just not really pleasant either. Aside from that, Yuffie accidentally flung her tea across the table when she was using her hands to describe the latest addition to town, causing everyone to scramble away from the table. It turned out that it wasn't hot enough to really do anything and Merlin's magic made it easy to clean up, but it was kind of terrifying in the moment.

Needless to say it was a huge relief when they finally made it back to their hotel room.

Until Riku dropped the bomb that he wanted Sora to share Kairi's bed rather than his.

"C'mon, it's only a full size bed. We'd barely fit, but you and Kairi are both small so it'd still be comfortable for you two together." He argued, already sprawled out across the one bed.

Kairi walked out of the bathroom and walked past them, crawling under the covers and laying down immediately, "I really don't care either way. I'm tired and going to sleep so you guys can figure it out on your own."

Sora looked back to Riku who answered, "I'm not moving. So your choice: with Kairi or on the floor."

"Okay." He grumbled, grabbing his pajama pants from the top of his bag and taking them into the bathroom with him. He took his sweet time changing and brushing his teeth before finally walking back into the room, dragging his feet across the floor as he did so. Kairi looked like she was fast asleep and Riku looked like he almost was, despite the fact he was still wearing all of his clothes and still on top of all of the blankets.

He wasn't sure why he was so hesitant and why his face felt like it was on fire. Even if he'd never spent the night at her apartment, they'd still taken naps together and it's not like they were going to be doing anything other than sleeping. Still, he shot a glare over to Riku's sleeping form before sitting down on the bed and slipping his legs underneath the blankets.

Kairi blinked open her eyes before turning over and whispering, amused, "So you gave up arguing with Riku?"

"Well, yeah, you told me to do that hours ago." He joked in response, grinning.

"Hmm. Guess I did." She closed her eyes and moved closer to him, resting her head against the bottom of his neck and his chest.

Sora blinked, feeling flustered again, his voice low as he pointed out, "Uh. What about Ri—"

"He's sleeping." She interrupted him and he felt the vibrations of her voice against his skin, "And I wanna go back to sleep too."

"But what about in the morning—"

She reached up lazily, briefly touching his face with her eyes still closed, "Just get comfy and go to sleep. Don't worry about anything else." So he did, draping an arm around her and intertwining his legs with hers, enjoying her warmth and easily drifting off.

He slept better than he had in years and he came to the conclusion that waking up to see Kairi next to him was definitely one of the best feelings in the world.


	18. Coming Clean

**This chapter should be a little bit more like what you're used to reading. I apologize again for how short last chapter was, but I just seemed to get more and more bad news last month. Things are going better now, though I think writing this helped me cope with the bad stuff in a way.**

**There was originally only two chapters planned after this but I think I've gotta add another one in lol. So I'm getting close to the end, but we've still got a little bit. **

_I Can Barely Say_

Chapter Seventeen: Coming Clean

"I'm so sore…" Kairi's voice was muffled by her pillow, her body sprawled out across her bed.

Sora sat beside her, letting out a small laugh, "You and Riku became such big babies. Consider sparring for fun every once in a while so you won't be so out of practice when we have to fight for real." After they both practically pushed Riku home, Sora was tasked with making sure Kairi made it home without collapsing. After making it that far, he decided he'd just stay at her apartment for a while. He wouldn't admit it to them, but he was a bit tired too. But he just used the excuse of wanting some alone time with her; which of course wasn't totally a lie.

"Ughhh…" She groaned, flopping over onto her side, "I already have too many things to do without having to worry about that."

Sora squinted, "Like what? You're on winter break now, so all you've got is work which is only part time."

"Well I meant for when I was in school. But I've also got to start Christmas shopping, you know. You should too." She nudged him with her foot.

He shrugged and let out a breath of air, "Yeah I guess." His lips curling upward into a smile, he continued excitedly, "Aside from the shopping, I'm really excited to be back at home for Christmas. All the decorations in town and Riku's parents' party… I missed that stuff so much. I mean, the Halloween party was fun too, but, nothing beats when it's just us three and our families." He paused before correcting, "Well, I guess other people's parents are there too, but all we have to do is say hi to them and we're set for the night."

Kairi giggled, "It's been kind of boring with just me and Riku, so hopefully you'll liven up the party a little bit."

"Of course I will." He looked down at her, "But, can't be too mischievous. Don't want to get on Santa's bad list." She let out another laugh as he continued, "Speaking of… Riku owes me SO many Christmas presents for telling me Santa wasn't real! I missed out on seven years because of him."

"Still mad about that?" She sat up, repeating, "Ow" a few times as she did so.

"Yeah!" He crossed his arms, "Aren't you?"

She shrugged, "I mean, I kept believing for a few years after you stopped… so it didn't really affect me as much."

He squinted, "Wait, really?"

"Yeah, you never noticed that I never really gave you a straight answer whenever you asked about it?" She titled her head and looked him curiously.

"No, not at all." Sora shook his head, "Geez. Guess I didn't listen to you very well…"

Kairi shrugged again, a small smile on her lips, "You did and you didn't. It depended on the subject."

"Hm." He slouched and let out a little sigh.

Letting a moment of silence pass by, Kairi spoke quietly, "Speaking of listening… I think I need to go ahead and tell you about what happened when you were gone; what I've been avoiding."

"Really? Right now?" He blinked, confused, "We just got back. Are you sure you don't want to wait?"

"I keep pushing it off." She took a breath, "And I need to just tell you before I make it worse."

Sora furrowed his brow, "Make it worse? What do you mean? I thought you said it wasn't even that serious."

"Well—it is important, even if it's not serious. And it's not fair to you to keep it a secret." Kairi's confidence seemed to dissipate with every single word she spoke.

"O—okay…" Sora answered, suddenly feeling so unsure. She was downplaying whatever it is, because otherwise she wouldn't be this nervous to tell him. The last time he'd seen her like this was shortly after he came home; when he thought she'd told him everything there was to tell.

She was only a couple of inches away, but the gap between them felt immense as she leaned her back against the wall and started talking, "I'm just basically going to go more into detail about what happened. You already know about the whole serial dating thing. But I didn't tell you about the one boyfriend that was particularly emotionally abusive and manipulative. Not that I can really say much, considering I dated them to try and stop missing you. He was the one who called me 'Kai'. And he pretty much only ever called me Kai—never Kairi. So that's why the name sort of made my skin crawl when you first used it. Even though it was you and I know you're nothing like him, it just brought back so many bad memories."

His concern for her was stronger than the anger starting to build up in his chest, but he couldn't stop himself from asking, "Who was it?"

"Sora, I dealt with him, okay?" She pleaded with him to drop it, "Riku wanted to do something too and I wouldn't let him. So I won't let you either."

"But Kairi—" He raised his voice, but she interrupted him.

"_Please_." She touched his arm, "As much as I hate to say it, that's not all I need to tell you. Just let me keep going, okay?" His eyes studied her and he gave a solemn nod, his jaw tight. "Thank you." She sighed, lowering her head again as she continued, "Because this part is going to be even harder to tell you."

Sora was almost in a daze at this point. What else could she possibly tell him? How could it get worse? His mind was racing and he already felt sick to his stomach, but his eyes were glued to her.

Her voice waivered as she started talking again, "After how I acted at the Halloween party and watching me date all of these guys who were absolutely terrible to me, Riku pulled me aside because he was really worried about me. And I fought back and forth with him for a while, telling him I was fine and that I didn't need someone to watch over me." Her eyes were starting to tear up, but she smiled to herself as she admitted, "I was stubborn and stupid and it took me two months of dating that asshole to realize it. When I finally did, I basically crawled back to Riku, crying like a baby. I was a complete mess and… a-and," The tears finally started to drip down her cheeks as she blinked, "We kissed."

If it was possible for his heart to shatter, he was pretty sure this is what it felt like. There was a sharp pain in his chest and he suddenly felt so, so empty.

"We only kissed that one time, and we didn't really date, but we were just sort of there for each other for a while in a way that no one else could be. It wasn't like when everyone on the island forgot about you—it was just like no one cared. Like they moved on. But we couldn't—I couldn't." Kairi further explained, seemingly hoping that what she was saying would somehow make it okay.

But it didn't.

She gripped his arm a little tighter, her voice desperate as her crying intensified, "Sora—I'm sorry."

He was cold and unmoving, his voice barely above a whisper as he asked, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because Riku was there for you when you came home. He put you before everything else and made sure you were okay." She wiped her eyes with her sleeve, "I was too confused, hurt, and guilty to be there for you like that. I couldn't take that away from you. I wanted to tell you—I've always wanted to tell you. And Riku has too, but we both decided I should be the one to do say it. But I couldn't figure out how, because no matter what it was going to end up like this…"

"But this _long,_ Kairi?" His head finally snapped upwards, "I've been home for months. I've been okay for months. I know I was in bad shape, but you should have told me sooner." He raised his hands to his face and pressed his fingers against his forehead, "Waiting so long—waiting until I was so comfortable at home again…and with you. And with Riku." He slipped off of her bed and stood up, "I feel like I need to start all over again now."

She continued to cry, her shoulders shaking as she repeated, "I'm sorry…"

"I just need to be alone for a while, okay?" Sora moved towards the door, not waiting for a reply.

Just as he swung the door open, he heard her voice squeak, "Okay." He closed the door quietly and tried to sneak out, but Selphie was sitting in the living room and caught sight of him after a few seconds.

"Sora," She called out softly. He lifted his head curiously, watching her as she asked, "Are you feeling okay? You look really pale."

He saw her earbuds draped around her neck as usual, the faint sound of music coming out of them still as she talked.

She hadn't heard. Good.

"I'm just… tired. So I'm heading home." Sora lied, immediately starting to walk again so that he could hide his face. Even if he was almost bad at lying, Selphie could catch him in a lie better than anyone else; even when they were kids, though Kairi was a close second.

Even if her voice was doubtful, she didn't press the subject, answering awkwardly, "Well, see you later."

"Bye." He slipped his shoes back on and headed out the door, but had no idea where he was going to go.

The play island, the dock, places in town, the gummi ship, his own room; all of the places he felt most comfortable had too many memories of them. Everywhere did, really. Even when they were apart, he thought of them constantly, but now all he wanted to do was to _not_ think about them. Because the more he did, the more he felt sick to his stomach.

He eventually wandered to a sharp hill with an overlook of the ocean below, surrounded by nothing but grass and a few trees. He'd been here before, but there weren't any strong memories tied to this place like the others. At least it wasn't overwhelming and he finally felt like he could breathe a little.

He sat down in the shade of a tree, leaning his back against it as he looked out into the ocean. The sharp curve of the hill hid the beach below from this distance, but the ocean glittered in the midday sun beneath a clear sky. But the air was cold and sitting in the shade probably only made it worse, though Sora's strong dislike for winter was probably the last thing on his mind right now.

'_I guess I shouldn't be that surprised_.' He folded his arms against his chest in an attempt to keep himself warmer, '_Everyone always told me that he was a better match for her and I always knew how much he cared about her too. Of course something happened between them when I wasn't around to get in the way.'_

He knew Kairi truly did love him and that whatever had happened with Riku was probably no more important to her than what had happened with the other guys, but he still couldn't shake the pain and his rising self-doubt. And worst of all, he couldn't stop analyzing all of the times when they'd all been together. The awkward silences, Kairi's weird behavior that one afternoon while they were all studying together, the Halloween party that Riku had teased her about; those moments were few and far between, but he'd picked up on them and wanted to think nothing of them until now. It all made sense and yet he was still incredibly confused, his mind spinning with questions.

"Sora," He felt a sharp drop in his chest as he heard Riku's tired voice, almost out of breath, "There you are." The brunette avoided eye contact, standing up and gripping on to the tree as he considered running. But the moment he took a step forward, his friend called him out on it, "Wait. _Please_ talk to me."

"…I wouldn't really know what to say." Sora answered honestly, still avoiding Riku's eyes.

"Fine, then listen. Just don't go anywhere." He took a step back, giving Sora more room.

The younger boy heaved a sigh and answered quietly, "I'm listening."

"I'm sorry. I know I can probably say that a thousand times and it won't matter, but I just want you to know that from the start. It shouldn't have happened. But I felt like I had lost you and it felt like I was losing her too. I was desperate, scared, and lonely. I know I said that I was over my feelings for Kairi years ago, but I was wrong." Riku swallowed hard and bit his lip, stammering as he continued, "I-It was careless and I immediately regretted it."

Sora mumbled in response, his expression unchanging, "Well, it's done now, so…"

Riku was the one to sigh this time, "I know and I hate it. But we both knew it was wrong and that's why nothing ever became of it. She loves you; we both know that."

His eyes flickered upward, a mix of curiosity and a little bit of anger, "So is that why you haven't really been on any dates? Because you still have feelings for her?"

Riku squinted and shook his head fervently, "No, that has nothing to do with Kairi. That's just me."

"Hm." Sora hummed in response, not sure of the validity of his answer.

"Sora, I meant every word I said to you when you came over to my house to invite me on that trip. I want nothing for the best for you two. And I'm sorry I put that in jeopardy even in the slightest, but if you want to be mad at someone, then be mad at me. Even if she went along with it, it was my fault."

It was tempting to lay all the blame on Riku. They'd butted heads their whole life and it was easy to be mad at him, unlike Kairi. But unfortunately, he knew that it wouldn't work.

"There's a lot of things I'm feeling right now and mad is only one of them." He answered honestly, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.

"I—I know. I betrayed your trust." Riku stared off towards the ground.

"You should have told me from the beginning. When I first got home and you told me she'd dated other guys—you should have just told me right then." Sora raised his voice, his frustration growing, "I know you were waiting on Kairi, but it would have been so much easier to handle when I thought she hated me. It still would have hurt, but not this much."

His voice grew quieter as he tried to explain, "I didn't want come between you two and she was too scared to tell you." He looked up, his face growing stern and serious as he continued, "Remember how scared you were to talk to her when you first got home because of how you felt about hurting her? It was the same for her—it just took her longer to explain. And it only got more complicated when you two started reconnecting and she realized she couldn't bear to lose you ever again. She was afraid this would destroy you… and well, she wasn't wrong to be scared."

"She's not going to lose me." The brunette mumbled in response.

"She doesn't know that right now." Riku pointed out, "All she knows is that you said you needed to be alone and you walked off."

Sora gave a small laugh of disbelief, "Well, you know, it's kind of hard to comfort someone after they tell you something that makes you feel like your heart just shattered into a thousand pieces."

He inhaled sharply, "That's understandable. And she understands that too… Basically what I'm saying is, just reach out to her. Let her know you're still there even though you need time."

Though it wasn't bad advice, Sora couldn't help but wonder out loud, "Am I really that awful with Kairi that you need to always tell me what to do?" Most of the time he willingly asked for advice with Kairi, but it was irritating that Riku always seemed to have the answer; like he knew her better than he did.

"That's not it at all. I want you two to make up because you're both my best friends and I want you to be happy. You're both hurt and so I just suggested what I think is the best way to help both of you." He took a breath, "Maybe being alone for a while is helpful, yeah, but I'm sure you'll want to be with Kairi again soon. I'm just saying don't let your emotions get the better of you and to not shut her out. You can do that to me if you want; I don't care, because I know this will be like every other argument we've ever had except this time I know you have the right to be mad at me. So I don't care if you want to avoid me or whatever."

He shook his head, "I'm not gonna avoid you, either. I'm not that cowardly." Sora started to walk, past Riku and on to the path leading back towards the residential area of the island, "I just don't really want to talk anymore today."

"Can you at least just call Kairi to tell her you made it home?" Riku called out loudly to his friend's back, exasperated.

Sora didn't answer, but he had the intention of walking back to her apartment eventually anyway. Though he didn't want to admit it, he knew that Riku was right. He didn't want Kairi to feel as if there was any doubt in his mind about her because that was the farthest thing from the truth. He was hurt and he probably would be for a while, but he loved her and nothing was going to stop that.

He dropped by his house to let his mom know he was home and to get a little more of alone time before going to see her. Everything was quiet when he got back there; the living room was empty, there were no sounds and everything was starting to get dark as the sun was setting.

He blinked his eyes and wondered, '_Is she even home?'_

Selphie's bedroom was empty, so it was possible she and Kairi could have went somewhere or Selphie could have just left for a shift at work. Kairi's door was shut, so there was only one way to find out.

When he leaned against the door, he heard the faint sound of sniffling and started to twist the door knob. As soon as she saw him start to open the door, she popped out of the blankets and onto the floor, "Sora!" He hugged her back as she clung onto him, she repeating whispers of, "I'm sorry" and "I love you".

Though he would answer "I love you too", he wouldn't say much else if she ventured farther than those words. So they stayed there for a while, just embracing each other in the darkening room.


	19. Letting Go

**Again, I completely apologize for the amount of time that it took to write this. Life hasn't been going my way once again and having to write Sora dealing with his own issues was kind of hard when I was barely able to handle my own. **

**My goal was to post this chapter before or on Christmas so that I could write the next chapter for New Years Eve but unfortunately I missed that mark… I hope you guys still enjoy it even though it's a tiny bit out of season lol.**

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Eighteen: Letting Go

"Are you done yet?" Sora leaned against the wall tiredly with several shopping bags hanging from his arm, watching Riku circle the jewelry counter for what felt like the hundredth time.

"Just give me literally ten more seconds." He mumbled in response before finally asking the associate for what he wanted and paying for it. As he walked back to Sora, he sighed, "You're lucky because your mom just tells you exactly what she wants. Mine wants to be _surprised_."

He shrugged in response, starting to walk towards the exit, "I let Santa deal with the surprises."

"What's with all the presents, anyway?" Riku pointed towards the multiple bags.

Sora looked down at the bags and answered sheepishly, "I got stuff for everyone at Disney Castle. And something for Ariel and Eric's daughter, Melody. Plus a few others…" He took a breath and shivered as they stepped out into the cold, explaining, "I asked about it the last time I was in Christmas Town. You can just leave things under the tree for people in other worlds and Santa will take care of it. But I just mostly got small stuff; he already has a really busy night so I don't want to make it too much more difficult."

He listened thoughtfully with wide eyes before commenting, "That's really great that he's willing to do that… I guess I need to go back to the mall soon, then." Riku gave a little laugh, "You just made my Christmas list a lot longer." Stopping in his tracks, he asked, "Wait, wait, wait. How recent was this trip? Did you know that you could send stuff here?"

Sora rolled his eyes and reached into his pockets to grab his gloves, "It was at the beginning of this year, when it was starting to look like it was possible to come home. And I don't owe you any presents."

Riku groaned, "Seriously? I'm sorry about the Santa thing. How was I supposed to know?"

Sora didn't answer as he struggled to keep the bags from falling off of his arm as he put his gloves over his hands.

"You're not gonna be grumpy at the Christmas party, are you?" The older boy asked in a teasing tone, but the way his voice lowered told Sora he was definitely asking earnestly as well.

It'd be the first time that all three of them would be together ever since Kairi confessed what had happened and Sora couldn't decide if it was good or bad that the Christmas party only involved their families rather than the whole island like the Halloween party.

He shrugged, answering back with a muttered joke, "Maybe I'll get into the Christmas spirit by then."

"I hope so." Riku let out a breath of air. Watching his friend's sapphire eyes give him a questioning look, he defended, "I mean I obviously understand _why_ you're like this… but you know. I just want us to be able to have fun and enjoy it."

"Yeah." The brunette stared forward, his expression blank.

Letting a moment of silence pass by, Riku asked, "So, you doing anything else today?"

"I'm gonna go over to Kairi's after I wrap all this stuff." He answered automatically, vaguely lifting his arm to motion towards the presents.

With that, he gave a small smile, "Oh, okay."

Sora caught a glance of him and frowned, scrunching his face as he asked, "What? It's not like I ever stopped seeing her."

"I know. Just glad you're not keeping to yourself." The older boy answered honestly.

"Okay…" He huffed and looked away.

They walked in silence after that until they had reached the road that lead down to Riku's house. Before he departed, he gave a small wave, "See you tomorrow night!"

"Right." Sora nodded and kept walking.

Finally alone, he sighed. He didn't really want to be like this, either; especially when Riku was trying so hard to stay on his good side. But it was like the words escaped his mouth before he could even think about what he was saying lately.

It was the same way with Kairi. Every time he fired back a cold response, the look she got in her eyes crushed him. He tried to make up for it, but he couldn't stop it from happening, and it was starting to get to the point where it seemed like just being around him made her nervous.

At first he wanted to believe she deserved it in some way, as did Riku, but he was already tired of trying to hold a grudge. He just wanted to move forward, but for some reason the way he was acting wasn't reflecting that at all whenever he was around them.

But that had to change tonight.

Riku could maybe handle being a punching bag for a while, but there was no way he could handle seeing Kairi close to tears again. He wanted to see her smile; and _really_ smile, not the half-hearted ones she'd been giving him for the past week or so.

He spent probably a little under an hour digging out the wrapping paper and bows, hunting down a pair of scissors, and actually wrapping the gifts before he finally started to make his way over to her apartment. But among all that chaos, he finally came up with a plan.

If words were what kept messing him up, then he wouldn't use words. He had thought to himself during their first kiss since he'd returned to the islands that it seemed like that was the better way to show her how much he'd missed her. So maybe the same thing was true now; to show her how much he still cared about her and how much he wanted to move forward from this.

After being let in and giving Selphie a brief greeting, Sora pulled Kairi into her bedroom and shut the door quietly.

"Sora, what—" She started to say, but he lifted his hands to cup her face and his lips covered hers before she could finish her sentence. She kissed him back awkwardly at first, thrown back by his intensity, but started to match his passion as his lips wandered down to her neck and his fingers started to brush against the bare skin underneath the hem of her shirt. Kairi let out a few sharp breaths as she felt his lips and tongue continue down a path to her shoulder and she tugged down the zipper of Sora's jacket, pulling it off enough so that he only had to shrug his arms slightly for it to completely fall off.

With that done, she imitated him and reached under his blue sweater to run her hands across his stomach and around his back, admiring and tracing the lines of his muscles as well as the few scars that he had gained over the years.

He dipped his head, catching her lips again and pulling her tightly against him. Still, she kept pulling him even closer to herself until they ended up toppling over onto her bed. Though she looked surprised for a moment, she continued kissing him eagerly until Sora pulled away. He kept his one hand at her side, still underneath her shirt, but moved the other to cup her face again and grinned, "Whoa, calm down. I wasn't planning to let it go this far."

Kairi flushed, "I wasn't either! It was an accident."

"I'm just teasing you." He kissed her forehead, still leaning over her.

She flashed a smile, her eyes looking up to search for his. "So what exactly _was_ that?"

He let out a small sigh and lowered his head, lightly pressing his cheek against hers as he hid his face, "I'm sorry I've been so distant lately… I've really been trying not to be, but for some reason things that I don't even really mean just keep flying out of my mouth. So I figured that I could just show you how I feel, instead." He lifted his head again, giving a small smile as he asked, "Did it work?"

Kairi laughed and reached up to run her hand through his hair before resting it against his cheek, "Yeah, it did."

"Good." He closed his eyes, "I just want to move on from this. I know it's not going to go away, but I'm just tired of hurting. And I'm tired of hurting you and Riku even though you've both already apologized a million times and there's really nothing else you can do."

She didn't answer verbally, but lightly rubbed her thumb against his cheek in a comforting way.

Blinking his eyes open, he gave a small smile again as he suggested, "I know it's sudden and it's cold outside, but do you want to go watch the sunset today?"

She nodded and he started to lift himself off of her before she pulled him in for another kiss. "I love you."

"I love you too." He pulled himself upward before tugging on her arm and pulling her up as well, "C'mon, we've gotta hurry if we wanna make it on time."

oxoxoxoxoxo

Decked out in the traditional ugly Christmas sweaters, they walked into Riku's house together and got bombarded by what felt like dozens of older adults. Aside from the standard "Merry Christmas", they heard several comments about how much Sora had grown, how everyone just _knew_ they'd end up together, and even someone asking about when Sora intended to propose and he promptly proceeded to choke on the water he was sipping on at the time. Plenty of people on the islands did get married young, but Kairi was in school and he was only just about to start. Not to mention the fact that he was constantly traveling between worlds on top of that.

Kairi, on the other hand, found the whole thing hilarious (after making sure he didn't actually choke).

Finally making it into the den where Riku was waiting on the couch, Sora collapsed backwards onto it with a heavy sigh and the older boy laughed, "That bad on the way in, huh?"

"Someone asked if he was going to propose soon and he nearly died from choking on his water." Kairi answered in an amused tone, sipping on her own glass of water after she finished speaking.

He let out a laugh, "That definitely sounds like something that would happen to Sora."

"We're only twenty—I just really didn't expect that question at all." He defended with a wave of his hands.

"Oh, so now it's _only_ twenty." Riku pointed out with a smirk, "A few months ago you thought twenty was getting old."

The brunette groaned, holding his forehead as he tried to think of a response, "It is, but it isn't... Ugh. I don't know." Kairi leaned against his side with a small smile, linking her arm in his and resting her hand on his leg.

"Well, you seem to be back to your old self today." Riku smiled and reached forward for his glass of wine, taking a swallow.

Sora lowered his hands into his lap, "Yeah. About that—I've been trying to let go and move on but I was really struggling with it. So sorry for being a jerk, I guess."

"Apology accepted," Riku took another swig before jokingly adding, "I guess."

The brunette gave a little glare but it was quickly followed by a small laugh, "I deserved that." He leaned backwards against the couch, "It feels sort of weird being at one of these parties after such a long time, but it feels right too."

"I think that's just the feeling of getting older, because I can say the same. Especially seeing Riku just casually drinking wine." Kairi motioned towards him.

"I'm legally allowed to have it now, so of course it's going to be casual." He shrugged in response, "But I mean, I see what you're saying."

"Everything just stayed the same for so long that we didn't really think anything could change." Sora managed to put the feeling into words, "At least until we got off the islands. But being back home just sort of gets you into that mindset again."

Riku nodded, "Hmm… Sounds about right."

"So that means you need to get us off the islands more, Sora." Kairi teased him with a small poke to his shoulder.

He scoffed, "I can try, but between both of your schedules… and now _mine_, I can only imagine it's going to be chaos trying to even get my life sorted out."

"That's right. I almost forgot you're starting school next month." Riku put down his glass, focusing on his friend intently, "Are you excited? Nervous?"

"A little bit of everything is the best way to describe it. I don't even know." Sora gave a little sigh, "It's gonna be tough, that's for sure."

Kairi gave a small smile, "We manage, I'm sure you can too. You may just have to make your naps a little bit shorter so that you can manage time better."

"Ha ha. Very funny." Though he answered sarcastically, a wide grin spread across his face, "Well, at least I've still got a little over 2 weeks before I have to worry about it."

"It'll go by faster than you think." He heard Riku say from his side and he turned his head to look at him.

"Gee, thanks. That's just what I wanted to hear." He raised his eyebrows in disbelief, but a smile still pulled at the corner of his lips.

Kairi exhaled, "It's really not that bad. I know it seems a lot more intimidating than high school, but it's kind of better for a few different reasons. First of all, your classes are split up by days and it'll probably be rare for you to spend 6 hours in class like you did in high school. Once you get used to the classes themselves and the workload, I think it's better. You have way more time to do other things."

"Seems pretty hard to believe when you and Riku complain you're busy all the time." He looked back to her, doubtful.

"It's all about time management during the semester. You'll get the hang of it." She answered simply, "Just wait till summer—then there'll be plenty of free time."

"For you," Sora quickly corrected, "I'm basically going to be in school forever since I'm so far behind. I have to take summer classes."

She gave a sheepish smile, "Sorry."

Riku, however, shook his head, "Summer classes might be a little more intense, but they're shorter, so you'll still have plenty of free time."

"Hmm." The brunette blinked, "Then I guess maybe this won't be too bad."

"Well, I know you two are stressing me out by talking about school when we're supposed to be on break," Kairi placed her hand heavily on Riku's table, making a loud noise to interrupt the two boys, "So let's do some Christmas-y things already!"

"Food, presents, games, movies?" Riku listed everything off the top of his head, "What do you want?"

She elbowed her boyfriend, motioning for him to choose, "Sora?"

"Presents." He answered automatically, tilting his head slightly to look at Riku, "Though I _still_ don't think you deserve what I got you."

Riku practically fell off the couch before a look of annoyance crossed his face, "What do you want me to do? Send Santa an apology letter!?"

Sora shrugged, "Maybe. Doesn't sound like a bad idea."

He sighed heavily, "Okay. Okay. I will, but later tonight after we run out of things to do."

Sora hummed to himself in thought and Kairi smiled, watching the exchange quietly. "Promise?" He finally asked, his face completely serious.

"P-promise." Riku stuttered, a bit taken back.

Sora flashed a grin before jumping up from the couch, pulling Kairi with him, "Alright, then let's do it."


	20. Stay

**I'm sorry this story has sort of fallen by the wayside in recent months. Alongside the fact my life is just really not going as I planned, I have issues when it comes to ending stories lol. And this story means a lot to me, so it made it all the more harder. **

**Thanks for all of your support and I hope you guys enjoy this last chapter. **

I CAN BARELY SAY

Chapter Nineteen: Stay

"So Riku's officially off the market, then?" Selphie asked loudly from the bathroom, focusing on herself in the mirror as she put her earrings in.

"Uh, I wouldn't say that, exactly." Sora stood in the hallway in the space between the bathroom and Kairi's room, leaning against the wall, "It's the first date with whoever it is."

She poked her head out into the hall, "He didn't tell you who it was?"

"Nope." He shrugged, "He's being super secretive."

Kairi stepped out of her room and into the hallway, now donning a light purple sweater dress as she chimed in, "But he's always been that way. He won't say anything until it's serious."

"I guess." Sora admitted with a drop of his shoulders, "But still, he can't tell _us_?"

Kairi shrugged and Selphie went back to doing last minute touch ups on her hair, "Either way, I still wish he would have given me a chance. I think we'd be a cute couple."

"Don't you have a date tonight, Selphie?" The brunette boy gave a questioning look towards the younger girl.

She turned the bathroom light off and walked out into the hallway, "Yeah, so?"

"Lucky guy…" He mumbled in response as she walked past him.

"Oh, shut up." She rolled her eyes, stopping to turn back around when she reached the kitchen, "Are you sure you two don't want to go into town too? I feel like it'd be really boring to just sit around here."

Kairi shook her head, giving an appreciative smile, "It's okay. Sora can't stay too late since he has to leave tomorrow. I've got some champagne and we can just listen to what's going on in town on the radio, so we're set."

Selphie shrugged, "Suite yourselves. I'm probably just gonna crash at my parents' house since it's closer, but I'll see you in the morning, Kairi. And Sora, I guess I'll see you eventually?" She gave a tilt of her head.

"I should only be gone for two days at the most. The King and Master Yen Sid know I'm about to start school again." He answered, sliding off the wall and standing up straight.

She gave him a confused look but nodded, "Uh, okay. Sure. See you then." She turned around and headed for the door, calling out loudly, "Bye!"

"Bye!" Kairi called after her, watching her shut the front door.

"So you gonna take me back to school shopping?" He joked, dangling an arm over her shoulder.

She rolled her eyes, "I guess. Mainly only because I need to get a few things for myself, too; otherwise I'd just tell you go by yourself. Since you're an adult now and you're supposed to be responsible, blah blah blah. You know, the stereotypical lecture."

He dropped his arm back to his side and raised an eyebrow, "Sounds like you got one yourself recently."

"Maybe." Kairi flashed a grin and retreated into the kitchen, pulling out the aforementioned champagne.

He followed after her, calling out, "From your dad? What about?"

She shook her head, holding the bottle up, "Nothing really, just him butting into my life and complaining about how I manage my time even though I live on my own now."

Sora let out a small sigh, "About spending time with me, right?"

"A little bit, but it's not just you." She tried to ease his worries, explaining, "He honestly doesn't even like that I'm still working at the coffee shop. I originally got it as a summer job and he expected me to quit when school started up again so I could focus. But it's nice to make your own money and I like working there so I don't see a reason to quit if I can manage everything. It's not like I'm failing my classes; he's just being a pain, but I know he means well."

"He's not ready to let go yet." He crossed his arms with a small smile, "He still sees you as his little girl."

Kairi gave a roll of her eyes, "Well, I've basically been able to handle being on my own ever since leaving the islands the first time and the fact that he _still_ can't cope with it drives me insane." She pushed the bottle towards him, "Do you have any idea how to open this without potentially killing us both or breaking something?"

He quickly shook his head and let out a laugh, "Not unless the Keyblade would work on it, but somehow I doubt that." He took it gingerly and turned towards the front door, "Uhh. We can take it outside? That might be the safest option."

"That might work." She nodded enthusiastically before leading him out, immediately wrapping her arms around herself when they stepped outside, "Brr. It's so cold!"

"Well hopefully we won't be out here for very long." Sora angled the bottle away from his body and turned his head, spinning the bottle slowly with his thumb over the cork until it eventually shot off, landing only a few feet away.

Kairi rushed after it and picked it up before holding it up to him, "Not bad!"

"Didn't even spill it!" He grinned proudly, holding it closer to his body.

"But can you pour it into a glass?" She put her hand on her hip, giving him a questioning look.

"Nope."

She laughed and held out her arms, "I'll take it from here."

He gave her the bottle and followed her back inside, slipping his shoes back off and locking the door as Kairi worked to pour the champagne.

"I'm guessing you don't want much." She said loudly from the kitchen, hunching over so that she could peek through the bar opening to where he was.

"Even if I didn't have somewhere to be tomorrow, it's gross. So yeah, just a little." He gave her another grin as he made his way to the kitchen.

She laughed, "I know, I know. But we've gotta at least make a toast—it's customary." She held out his glass, holding her own close to her chest.

He took it and raised an eyebrow, watching her curiously, "So what exactly are we toasting to? It's not even the new year yet."

"Yeah, but you said that if you were going to drink anything you needed to do it early in the night, so I'm improvising." She looked up at him with a little smirk.

"Uh, okay." Sora let out a sheepish laugh and watched her patiently.

She cleared her throat dramatically before raising her glass, "To a year of new beginnings!"

He reached out to tap his glass against hers with a loud clink before pulling it back and swallowing a sip of the champagne. Trying his best to hide his distaste, he joked, "So how long did it take you to come up with that?"

"You'd be surprised." She answered with a twirl of her glass, "I thought of a couple of other things but sometimes it's best to stick with the simple thing that pops into your head first."

"I guess so." He nodded along taking another tiny sip before making his way over to her couch and leaving his drink on the table, making sure to use a coaster, "So what'd you have planned for tonight exactly?"

Kairi shrugged as she made her way over to him, "Nothing, really. I figured since we did the crazy holiday parties for Halloween and Christmas that this one we could just relax." She gave a small smile, "I know everything ended up okay, but I also know you were pretty nervous about both of those parties. And New Year's Eve is an even bigger thing for the island, so I thought this would be for the best."

"Yeah, I'm sure we wouldn't have ended the night without someone whispering about something." He leaned his head back, "I'll be so glad when that stops—or at least dies down. I mean, it has a little bit in the past few months, but even once every few weeks is still bad enough."

"It is, and you know they _know_ that it's a terrible thing to do because they'll only do it when you're alone." She sighed heavily, "I hate that those jerks make it so hard for you to feel at home again."

Sora sat back up and bit his lip, admitting sheepishly, "Well, that's not the only part of it… There's kind of something else too."

Her eyes blinked open, "What is it?"

"Well, uh," He hesitated and scratched his head, "I don't really want to go into too much tonight, but not knowing who these guys were that you dated is sort of awkward. Especially at things like the Halloween party or even just us walking around together, because I feel like it's only a matter of time until someone says something and I'll just be completely lost. And like, it's not even because I'm dating you now, I just feel like since we've been friends for sixteen years that not knowing chunks of your life is weird. You don't even have to go into detail about who was what to you, because I know that's personal and really not my business unless you want me to know but—just pointing them out would make me feel better, I think."

"So you just want to know their faces?" She put her glass down on the table as well, her voice a mixture of curious and suspicious.

He sighed, "Yeah, I guess. Mainly it's just because everyone on the island knows everyone so… Sometimes it literally feels like I'm the only one who _doesn't_ know."

"I understand." She rested her hand just above his knee, smiling softly.

"Good, I really _really_ didn't want to sound like the stereotypical paranoid boyfriend or something." He let out a small laugh.

Raising her eyebrows teasingly, she answered, "You still kind of did for a second, but you saved yourself with the last thing you said."

"Phew!" He jokingly wiped his forehead with the back of his hand and Kairi rolled her eyes and smiled, amused.

After coming to a realization, she stood up and moved past Sora's legs to switch on the radio, "Guess I should turn this on, everything's going to start soon."

"Do you think there's actually going to be a good band for once this year?" Sora joked before he paused, "Or wait, I'm guessing there was probably a good band in the years I was gone just because."

She grinned and shook her head as she sat back down next to him, "No, there wasn't. And there probably won't be again this year. I still think me, you, and Riku should have learned how to play some instruments and started our own."

"You can play piano a bit." He reminded her and she scoffed, "I'm sure people would have said the same things about us that we're saying about them, anyway."

"True." She admitted with a nod, "Well, we don't really have to listen to them anyway—it's just always nice to have a little bit of white noise in the background."

Sora shrugged reached out to his glass, taking a small sip and making another face as he answered, "Yeah, I guess so."

"I can just pour it out, you know." She gave a little laugh, "You don't have to drink it."

"I can handle one glass—just very slowly." He put it back down.

She shook her head, "Alright, if you say so." She tapped her fingers against her leg, "Do you have anything that you want to do? Any new year 's traditions I'm forgetting that you absolutely can't live without?"

Sora grinned and shook his head softly, "Nah, I think you've got everything covered. But," He put his weight onto his hand and leaned over her, lingering close to her mouth, "Since I'm about to leave again, we could do something like this."

He brushed his lips over hers and she closed her eyes, smiling against him as she raised her hand to the back of his neck. "Not a bad idea." She hummed as she threaded her fingers into his hair.

"Glad you think so." He let out a small laugh and reached upward to let his other hand lightly trace her frame, his confidence boosted.

She leaned into his touch, letting him draw her in closer until she was sitting in his lap and he reached around her back to hold her in place. Her hands moved across his back and down his arm as he departed from her lips and made his way to her neck, lingering there even as she spoke, "Sora, I want to ask you something."

"What is it?" He paused but hovered close to her, the warmth of his breath still noticeable on her skin.

Kairi let out a breath of air and tightened her grip on him, her voice shaking, "Can you stay?"

Sora pulled away and blinked, a frown taking over his expression, "Kairi, you know I can't. I can't just leave people waiting when they need help—"

"I didn't mean it like that." She interrupted, though her voice was barely audible, "I just meant… could you stay here tonight? With me?"

His lips parted in surprise, but otherwise he didn't budge, "O-oh."

Kairi blinked a few times before lowering her head and hiding her face, "I understand if you can't."

"Of course I will." Her sadness snapped him back into reality and he reached around her, hugging her as tightly as he could manage and spoke his apology against her ear, "Sorry, you just kind of threw me off guard."

She nodded against him, "It's okay." Pressing her lips against his cheek briefly, she added softly, "Thank you."

He pulled back and cupped her cheek before leaning in to kiss her once again, his thumb gently running over her skin. Their kiss dissolved into a few short pecks and Kairi pulled away again, resting her head in the crook of his neck as she continued to hold on to him.

"I have to call my mom to tell her I'm not coming home, though…" Sora realized out loud, a small cringe passing over his face, "But, uh… I think I'll wait until after I know she's asleep."

Kairi laughed, nudging her head against him as she did so, "You're twenty now, remember? You shouldn't be embarrassed."

"Like you would tell your dad if you still lived at home." He looked down at her and she smiled.

"Alright, so maybe I wouldn't." She closed her eyes and played with the ends of his hair at the base of his neck, "So just tell her you decided to stay at Riku's."

He shook his head, "She knows I'm here and that Riku's out on a date too. Lying about it would only make me look worse. This isn't like when we snuck out to the play island and told our parents we were all at each other's houses. Or Selphie's house, in your case."

She laughed again at that, "No, it's not."

Sora leaned down to kiss her forehead, pushing some of her hair out of the way, "I told you that you're always getting me into trouble."

"I guess so." Kairi admitted with a wide grin as she looked up at him, "But I hope I'm worth it."

"_Most_ of the time." He answered with a smirk and she sent him a small glare in return, "But we've been getting into trouble together ever since we were little kids, you know. So I wouldn't have it any other way."

At that, she softened and gave a small smile before she sat up, leaning out of his arms and towards the table to grab the two glasses of champagne that had been forgotten. "To making mistakes and getting into trouble together, just like we always have." She held out his glass.

Sora took it and nodded, clinking their glasses together, "I like this one better."

"Me too." She took both of the glasses back and leaned into him again.


End file.
